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  • Rev. Jim Osborne
    True Christian™ Televangelist
    Director of Fundraising and Tithing
    On the Look Out for Wife #6!
    True Christian™
    • Jun 2009
    • 8622
    #16
    Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

    Originally posted by MidwestCatLady View Post
    Glory be, Rev. Jim - we HAVE met for a reason! I certainly can fax you over my CV and some samples. However, most of my publications are articles for regional newspapers or for medical publications (to denounce heathen beliefs like MTV and modern medical lies). My illustrations are simple pen and ink . . . that might be perfect for Penguin art.
    Excellent! Sounds great. The simple pen and ink might work for the penguins, but I'm thinking we really need some vivid red and orange hues for the hellfire flames. Make the fire jump off the page and scare the dickens out of the little 5 year old's reading it.

    Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.

      Comment

      • eliot mayfield
        God Squad
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2006
        • 9324
        #17
        Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

        In my book , the sequel! The flames will be a pop out feature! And don't try to buy me out! My profits go to Landover!
        Matthew:
        5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
        5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
        10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
        10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


        sigpic

          Comment

          • Mad Prophet Helmholtz
            Recovering Outpatient From The Landover Rehabilitation Unit
            Forum Member
            • May 2009
            • 666
            #18
            Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

            Eliot, Rev. Jim, whilst you argue amongst yourselves about who came up with the idea, why don't you give credit where credit is due?

            Originally posted by Eliot Mayfield, 6/4/2009
            I have discovered, or rediscovered a book about egg stealing gay penguins. It was posted here before by mad prophet hiemrholtz
            http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showt...light=penguins

            I have written a true version of the story just for True Christian™ children. I hope you read it to your child tonight.
            See, Rev. Jim stole Eliot's idea, which was in fact MY idea! If it wasn't for me, Eliot wouldn't have had the idea, therefore I am the one being plaigiarized. I think both of you need to lay off on the idea. Spaceship Jesus has inspired me with a story for children and I will be damned to hell if I let you greedy folks steal MY book!!!

            Oh, MidwestCatLady, go ahead and send your work over to me. Rev. Jim will probably gyp you on your cut of the pay anyways.
            sigpic
            SPACESHIP JESUS appeared to me in Astronaut form when I was staying in a motel in 1974. He then told me the TRUTH about our world and what illusions the SATANIC ALLIANCE uses to control us! To this day, I still receive SPACESHIP RADIO SIGNALS INTO MY BRAIN. Absolve yourself of your limited Matrix existence.

            Hosea 9:7
            The days of visitation are come, the days of recompence are come; Israel shall know it: the prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad, for the multitude of thine iniquity, and the great hatred.

              Comment

              • eliot mayfield
                God Squad
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 9324
                #19
                Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                Your link was to a pro-gay atheist story for kids. I wrote a pro-Christ children's book. All you did was post a link. I provided a literary service.
                Matthew:
                5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                sigpic

                  Comment

                  • Meek and Humble
                    Biblical Poet, Warrior and Scholar
                    Biblical Black Belt
                    Jr. Pastor
                    True Christian™
                    • Dec 2008
                    • 6197
                    #20
                    Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                    Brothers, stop this quarreling! You're acting like a bunch of Joos!

                      Comment

                      • eliot mayfield
                        God Squad
                        True Christian™
                        • Sep 2006
                        • 9324
                        #21
                        Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                        I have contacted my attorney, John Deaux, and expect to hear from him directly!
                        Matthew:
                        5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                        5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                        10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                        10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                        sigpic

                          Comment

                          • eliot mayfield
                            God Squad
                            True Christian™
                            • Sep 2006
                            • 9324
                            #22
                            Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                            There's gay penguins all over the place! I was googling to see where "MY" book was rated and found that homosexuality and egg stealing is rampant among penguins. I say we organize a Penguin hunt, and start protesting at zoos that allow homsexuality among penguins.
                            New york
                            San Fransissyco
                            Germany
                            China
                            That's the list so far. I will do some more googling and get back to you.
                            Matthew:
                            5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                            5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                            10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                            10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                            sigpic

                              Comment

                              • MidwestCatLady
                                Forum Member
                                Forum Member
                                • Jun 2009
                                • 164
                                #23
                                Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                                Gentleman, I think there is plenty of room for multiple Penguin books. Pop-up books, books with photographs and story books with colorful illustrations. It could be a series depicting the birth and life of a gay penguin. First we could kill off one of the parents - crushed to death by a polar bear and sent to Hell, then in the next book the other parent gets eaten by a walrus and goes to Hell and finally the little penguin joins his/her two momies in Hell after a Godless life as a confused homer and suicide. What a happy children's trilogy with so many good lessons!
                                sigpicGenesis 1:20-22
                                21And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that it was good.

                                  Comment

                                  • Mad Prophet Helmholtz
                                    Recovering Outpatient From The Landover Rehabilitation Unit
                                    Forum Member
                                    • May 2009
                                    • 666
                                    #24
                                    Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                                    Yes, but when I posted that link to the penguins I thought in my head, "Gee, wouldn't it be great if we wrote a book explaining how these penguins are going to burn in Hell?"

                                    I know you can read my thoughts Eliot. You live in Czechoslovakia which is a COMMUNIST country. Soviet black projects like Mindwave Scanners and Nueron Signal Collectors allow KGB and Iron Curtain spies to read the minds of NATO leaders. Cuban Missile Crisis averted when Nikita Kruschchev used SOVIET MIND READING TECHNOLOGY ON JOHN F. KENNEDY and learned that Kennedy was willing to launch a nuclear attack against Moscow and that is why he removed the missiles from Cuba.

                                    FLASH FORWARD TO 2009...Eliot Mayfield uses decades-old soviet tech out of mothballs to steal ingenious ideas from Mad Prophet Helmholtz. Cycle of time turning around again. Nietzschean Eternal Recurrence in full force.
                                    sigpic
                                    SPACESHIP JESUS appeared to me in Astronaut form when I was staying in a motel in 1974. He then told me the TRUTH about our world and what illusions the SATANIC ALLIANCE uses to control us! To this day, I still receive SPACESHIP RADIO SIGNALS INTO MY BRAIN. Absolve yourself of your limited Matrix existence.

                                    Hosea 9:7
                                    The days of visitation are come, the days of recompence are come; Israel shall know it: the prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad, for the multitude of thine iniquity, and the great hatred.

                                      Comment

                                      • eliot mayfield
                                        God Squad
                                        True Christian™
                                        • Sep 2006
                                        • 9324
                                        #25
                                        Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                                        Originally posted by Mad Prophet Helmholtz View Post
                                        Yes, but when I posted that link to the penguins I thought in my head, "Gee, wouldn't it be great if we wrote a book explaining how these penguins are going to burn in Hell?"

                                        I know you can read my thoughts Eliot. You live in Czechoslovakia which is a COMMUNIST country. Soviet black projects like Mindwave Scanners and Nueron Signal Collectors allow KGB and Iron Curtain spies to read the minds of NATO leaders. Cuban Missile Crisis averted when Nikita Kruschchev used SOVIET MIND READING TECHNOLOGY ON JOHN F. KENNEDY and learned that Kennedy was willing to launch a nuclear attack against Moscow and that is why he removed the missiles from Cuba.

                                        FLASH FORWARD TO 2009...Eliot Mayfield uses decades-old soviet tech out of mothballs to steal ingenious ideas from Mad Prophet Helmholtz. Cycle of time turning around again. Nietzschean Eternal Recurrence in full force.

                                        Kennedy was a Catholic and nuns dress like penguins! I'm here battling the commies. Don't you start on me goofball!
                                        Matthew:
                                        5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                                        5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                                        10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                                        10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                                        sigpic

                                          Comment

                                          • Rev. Jim Osborne
                                            True Christian™ Televangelist
                                            Director of Fundraising and Tithing
                                            On the Look Out for Wife #6!
                                            True Christian™
                                            • Jun 2009
                                            • 8622
                                            #26
                                            Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                                            What the hell?

                                            We're talking about Eliot stealing my idea now all the sudden the Cuban Missile Crisis is being brought into this?

                                            FINE, FINE, ELIOT! You are breaking me down! I can't believe I'm having to concede to you....

                                            Fine....

                                            How does 2% sound?

                                            Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.

                                              Comment

                                              • eliot mayfield
                                                God Squad
                                                True Christian™
                                                • Sep 2006
                                                • 9324
                                                #27
                                                Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                                                Originally posted by Rev. Jim Osborne View Post
                                                What the hell?

                                                We're talking about Eliot stealing my idea now all the sudden the Cuban Missile Crisis is being brought into this?

                                                FINE, FINE, ELIOT! You are breaking me down! I can't believe I'm having to concede to you....

                                                Fine....

                                                How does 2% sound?
                                                Ask my lawyer! He told me not to say anything until after your butt is in a sling in front of 12 jurors! Single digits will not sway me.
                                                Matthew:
                                                5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                                                5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                                                10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                                                10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                                                sigpic

                                                  Comment

                                                  • nonethanks
                                                    Toffo eating Girly-Man
                                                    • Jul 2009
                                                    • 70
                                                    #28
                                                    Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                                                    Originally posted by eliot mayfield View Post
                                                    Ask my lawyer! He told me not to say anything until after your butt is in a sling in front of 12 jurors! Single digits will not sway me.
                                                    how about 000% of the whole income? those are three digits

                                                      Comment

                                                      • eliot mayfield
                                                        God Squad
                                                        True Christian™
                                                        • Sep 2006
                                                        • 9324
                                                        #29
                                                        Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                                                        Boy, you need some guidance. Somebody needs to guide you to the woodshed where you get a lesson in manners.
                                                        Matthew:
                                                        5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                                                        5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                                                        10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                                                        10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                                                        sigpic

                                                          Comment

                                                          • nonethanks
                                                            Toffo eating Girly-Man
                                                            • Jul 2009
                                                            • 70
                                                            #30
                                                            Re: GLORY! SF "gay penguin" couple broken up by female penguin!

                                                            Originally posted by eliot mayfield View Post
                                                            Boy, you need some guidance. Somebody needs to guide you to the woodshed where you get a lesson in manners.
                                                            where you got lessons, I'd never allow anyone to tell me how to think and behave. I am me.

                                                              Comment

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