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  • Rebuko the Clown
    The Friendliest Clown in Town™
    Proud recovering ex-alcoholic, ex-addict, and ex-convict
    True Christian™
    • Jun 2010
    • 197

    #1

    A FREE "Jumping Castle" inflatable ride - My gift to Landover!

    ive been traveling thru the southwest like new mexico and arizona for the past couple of weeks on my mission to spread the WORD OF GOD to the unsaved. ive been doing childrens partys and clown shows and have all ready gotten 10 people adults and children to turn there lifes over to JESUS. PRAISE!

    However yesterday there was a horrible accident. i was called to do a party at a private home and i even brought a jumper. its an inflatable castle that kids jump around on. REAL FUN. well it was pretty windy and we didnt know if we should put the castle up or not but i told the girl's parents that its fine and the kids would be let down if we didnt put it up.

    Unfortenately a strong gust of wind lifted up the castle and the two girls inside of it went sailing thru the air, then got throwed off willy-nilly. The 7 year old fell off just as it started to take off so shes fine but the castle went about 20 feet into the air and crashed on top of the neighbors roof and the 10 year smacked her head pretty hard on the clay tiles of the roof and is now in bad condition at the hospital.

    So i obviusly have to get the hell out of arizona. i have no insurance for it and im looking at police charges and a lawsuit from the parents. so i dont need this jumper anymore. Im on my way back to Freehold as we speak...im in Amarillo TX right now on internet cafe.

    I AM GIVING THIS JUMPER TO LANDOVER BAPTIST CHURCH AS A LOVE OFFERING INSTEAD!!!

    It is an 11x11 jumper and ill even throw in the blower. Jumpers like this run about $1000 but im giving it for FREE. theres some pretty bad tears in the side but it can be patched up and made good as new. This will be perfect for church picnics and pancake breakfasts.

    Heres a pic of it (before the accident)



    YES! I AM A CLOWN FOR CHRIST! Owner/Operator of Lord's Derisive Laughter Christian Clown Ministry.
    Read my inspiring testimonial of how I came to Christ!
    Rebuko's Sleepover Castle - Let your kids spend the night at my place for a One-Night Jesus Camp experience!
  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78551

    #2
    Re: A FREE "Jumping Castle" inflatable ride - My gift to Landover

    Has there been any pickanninnies in it? Because getting it fumigated would cost money.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

    Comment

    • SUV
      True Christian™ Princess
      The Driving Force behind RA12
      Have at it, anytime!
      • Sep 2006
      • 11027

      #3
      Re: A FREE "Jumping Castle" inflatable ride - My gift to Landover


      Now THAT'S a piece of Plastic! With that around I might not be missing our Manger scenes so much at this unHoly time of the year!

      Comment

      • James Hutchins
        True Christian™
        Just a Regular Nice Guy
         
        • Jun 2009
        • 29433

        #4
        Re: A FREE "Jumping Castle" inflatable ride - My gift to Landover

        I bet God blew the kids away because they made blasphemous comments.
        Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
        Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
        Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
        Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
        Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
        Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

        Comment

        • Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson
          Pastor of Praise and Worship
          A True Christian™ Straight Shooter
          True Christian™
          • Jul 2009
          • 3890

          #5
          Re: A FREE "Jumping Castle" inflatable ride - My gift to Landover

          Originally posted by James Hutchins View Post
          I bet God blew the kids away because they made blasphemous comments.
          Like calling someone a bald head or something equally horrible to anger God.
          Praise and worship with Pastor Will. Services at 9 a.m., 11 a.m. and 6 p.m.


          Contact me. pastorwillsampson at gmail.com

          Comment

          • James Hutchins
            True Christian™
            Just a Regular Nice Guy
             
            • Jun 2009
            • 29433

            #6
            Re: A FREE "Jumping Castle" inflatable ride - My gift to Landover

            Originally posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson View Post
            Like calling someone a bald head or something equally horrible to anger God.
            Exactly. Words given in anger are often a source of Gods wrath.
            Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
            Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
            Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
            Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
            Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
            Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

            Comment

            • Cranky Old Man
              Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
              You kids get off his lawn!
               
              • Jan 2010
              • 22348

              #7
              Re: A FREE "Jumping Castle" inflatable ride - My gift to Landover

              Originally posted by Rebuko the Clown View Post
              Unfortenately a strong gust of wind lifted up the castle and the two girls inside of it went sailing thru the air, then got throwed off willy-nilly.
              Girls jumping around in a windy environment? Only filthy whores do that. Why were those girls out of their house anyway? Clearly God punished them for behaving like little harlots.

              The über whore who invented this filthy habit:
              5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
              To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
              James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

              Comment

              • Daisy Mae Johnson
                The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 15708

                #8
                Re: A FREE "Jumping Castle" inflatable ride - My gift to Landover

                Oh, what a wonderful gift. A free Rapture Ready Castle!

                Just climb in and be ready to be whisked away to Heaven in comfortable air pillows.

                It would be just like riding on a cloud! Those kids were so lucky!
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