[Nutella88]

Re: I left last night

So it is fine for the husband to "cheat" ? If the woman is not willing to have sex?. And I do believe that she said that Sex is not the problem.

[Levi Jones]

Re: I left last night

So it is fine for the husband to "cheat" ? If the woman is not willing to have sex?. And I do believe that she said that Sex is not the problem.

I do believe she said it was. She caught him doing the nasty m-word on the computer. That's her fault. If she had taken care of business at home, it wouldn't have come to this.

[Nutella88]

Re: I left last night

Our marriage bed had grown cold, and I thought that it was because he had lost interest in sex. Well to find him doing this proves that he's only lost interest IN ME!

This does not look like she has been denying him love.

[John W. Booth]

Re: I left last night

So it is fine for the husband to "cheat" ? If the woman is not willing to have sex?. And I do believe that she said that Sex is not the problem.

To date, only two sons have come of this marriage. By definition, a True Christian wife IS willing to have sex for the purpose of procreation as the True Christian husband is intent on enduring the act for the same purpose (and ONLY that purpose) for as long as the wife is able to conceive. Are there other problems? Sure, but none of which should ever have been made public or that should've caused the sons to have ever been separated from their father.

It's hard to imagine, Nut, that you will ever have much of a chance of attaining Salvation through Jesus Christ if you can't take His laws seriously. The Bible is quite clear on what your role as a husband must be and it sounds like BeliverInGod's husband took his responsibility TO GOD very seriously when he and his wife exchanged their marriage vows. If you have a problem with the instructions God gave us, maybe you can change His mind. Let us know how that works for you.

[Nutella88]

Re: I left last night

So he is allowed to cheat?

[Levi Jones]

Re: I left last night

So he is allowed to cheat?

Short answer no. Long answer maybe. Concubinage is spoken of in the Bible.

The New Testament clearly says that marriage is to between one man and one woman, but there are other arrangements available to men.

[Nutella88]

Re: I left last night

I do not believe that for a minute. And neither should she.

[Levi Jones]

Re: I left last night

I do not believe that for a minute. And neither should she.

Why are you against the sanctity of marriage? What is your malfunction?

[Nutella88]

Re: I left last night

"Being a Sassy-Mouthed Feminazi Bitch" Thank you Levi Jones.

I get all of this hatred just because I was trying to help a "Human"

[James Dewitt]

Re: I left last night

W
Now having said that.Make sure what exactly he was doing it too. There are two different ways of looking at this. If he was masturbating to lets say a Video then it's a minor problem that can be fixed. Now if he had found another person online to share sexual pleasures with, then yes that will be bad and not easily fixed. Has he been making you feel worthless in the last couple of month/weeks. If so have you suspected anything at all? Things like this may help us to help you (you don't have to like me, but those things can definitely help)

Please guys don't attack me over this. I am not justifying that the Video part is good or less evil. It's just a huge difference. Video is just an image..a person well is another person.

Masturbation ( handrosexural) is a sin no way around it.
Genesis 38:9-10
9And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother.
10And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also.

[BelieverInGod]

Re: I left last night

it seems to me that your disdain for your husband's authority goes way back. When you mention, " the "corrections" that have become harsher and harsher", I wonder why you haven't be able to learn earlier to stop the behaviors that led to the earlier (and obviously continuing) "corrections". What has kept you from complying with his directives? You know the rules, yet as recently as yesterday you defied him and entered his office against his rule. His activity in the office, as disgusting as it is, is actually irrelevant. You continue to defy him and you blame him for your defiance.

Well I wouldn't of gone in there if he had responded to my dinner calls. How did I know he didn't have a heart attack in there? Should I just leave him to rot? As for his corrections being harsher, he just seems to be getting pickier. Things that he's never complained about in 10 years of marriage now are worthy of having my face shoved into the floor (he rarely punches, more grabs/twists/shoves)

His sons belong at home where they can learn from their father's Godly example. Taking them as your hostages while you run off and enjoy your tantrum is wicked. If your brother has a spine, he's run you out of his apartment by now and has helped your husband's sons to reunite with their father. Shame on you for confusing the poor boys and leading them to believe that wives should be able to just walk off on their husbands in the face of adversity. You call yourself "BelieverInGod", but we both know what it is God would have you doing right now. You go on home now.

Well it's not like the boys could stay home with their father. He leaves on the road tomorrow, is he supposed to take them with him? Where is he supposed to stick them while he's working? Into animal crates?

Everything will be better once you have finally learned your place and have begun to work a lot harder at making a perfect home for your husband and his sons (future fathers). As for your attractiveness, surely you aren't saying it is utterly beyond your means to keep yourself fresh and pretty as a daisy for him. It's called work.

But how can I make a perfect home when I don't know what he wants? There have been times I've tried to get romantic by sending the kids off to my brothers for a 'sleepover', having a romantic dinner set up and wearing a new dress and the most I get is a grunt. If I ask if everything is alright, it's "fine", and that's it.

You don't have a problem with the advice offered by the 1611 King James Bible, do you BelieverInGod?

No I don't have problems with advice from the KJV, but what about these?

Genesis 29:20 And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her. (I love the Jacob and Rachel love story, so romantic )

Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

Colossians 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

This does not look like she has been denying him love.

Thank you Nutella, no I have not denied him anything. I do admit that sometimes the house could be cleaner than it is, sometimes dinner isn't ready on time, sometimes I feel like there's a little tornado of kids and dogs running after my cleaning destroying my work for the day. It gets overwhelming at times. I'll also admit that there's days that he's come home off the road and I haven't even hit the shower yet because I've been busy and the time just got away from me.

To date, only two sons have come of this marriage. By definition, a True Christian wife IS willing to have sex for the purpose of procreation as the True Christian husband is intent on enduring the act for the same purpose (and ONLY that purpose) for as long as the wife is able to conceive. Are there other problems? Sure, but none of which should ever have been made public or that should've caused the sons to have ever been separated from their father.

Actually we have three sons 9,8 (don't let anyone tell you you can't get pregnant while breast feeding) and 18 months. I guess I only talk about the oldest, because the middle child is a typical middle child, quiet, unassuming, never really stands out in a good way or a bad way. And the youngest, well at 18 months, he isn't doing a lot to be dealt with yet.

Sister, go back to him.

So what? You caught him with his pants around his ankles. If you weren't so frigid and were taking care of him, he would have no need to do those sorts of things.

He called me and said how sorry he was. He loves you and he is willing to take you back. Old Man Hatchet even volunteered to do some True Christian™ marriage counseling for you two lovebirds.

Old Man Hatchet also started a thread where he is looking for donations to buy shoe polish for wife beaters He also called me insolent on that thread. I don't think he'd be willing to hear my side of the story.

He's leaving the house tomorrow and will be on the road until Friday afternoon. I'll be going back to the house tomorrow to get some more stuff. I need to get the kids schoolwork, and I'll grab the kids mattresses so they aren't sleeping on the floor.

[Nutella88]

Re: I left last night

There is nothing wrong with the food being a little late. Cleaning after kids is crazy hard work. You can clean one area of the house,start on the next area, and once you are finished with the second area the first are is messy again. The simple solution is giving the kids a playroom. Let them mess that up as much as they will like. Oh no that is so wrong that you have not taken a shower before he got home... Honestly it is not. We cannot expect you to clean the entire house,cook,take care of the children and the dogs (which simply can take up all day) and then expect you to be clean from head to toe and dressed in a red dress. I personally do not belief in beating a woman, it only results in distrust.

I would like to know.

What expectations do you want your husband to fill?

[Nutella88]

Re: I left last night

And how does the Woman not have a right to take her children? She has done nothing wrong, he was the perpetrator.

[Levi Jones]

Re: I left last night

There is nothing wrong with the food being a little late. Cleaning after kids is crazy hard work. You can clean one area of the house,start on the next area, and once you are finished with the second area the first are is messy again. The simple solution is giving the kids a playroom. Let them mess that up as much as they will like. Oh no that is so wrong that you have not taken a shower before he got home... Honestly it is not. We cannot expect you to clean the entire house,cook,take care of the children and the dogs (which simply can take up all day) and then expect you to be clean from head to toe and dressed in a red dress. I personally do not belief in beating a woman, it only results in distrust.

I would like to know.

What expectations do you want your husband to fill?

Sister, don't listen to this person. He has truly repented! He needs you now.

Mark 2:17
When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

He has repented. He will sin no more.

You can't seriously be talking about separating him from his children?! Don't you know he would do everything in his power to stop you from doing that? Don't you?
In time you'll feel differently and you'll thank me for giving you this advice.

[Nutella88]

Re: I left last night

@Levi : Thanks for calling me a person this time

Honestly this debate can go on forever and always, the best advise here is that you talk to God and everyone around you. Family,friends and even your own Husband. Try to work things out before taking such a drastic measure. Don't get me wrong, there is a breaking point, which your husband should not trespass.