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Dinosaurs and Anal Buttsex: Definite Proof of the Bible and Recent Creation
The world is in turmoil. Peripheral matters, such as the well-deserved Covid Plague that Jesus sent to torment sinners and political upheavals have shifted the focus of the Christian population to these minor issues and made us all but forget the most severe threat to our Christian™ communities: Anal sex. Recently, the atheist community finally resolved the one issue that has kept them from believing in the inerrancy of the Bible, Recent Creation and Jesus. How did dinosaurs make love? Now that question has been solved and the staggering answers provide us new, powerful tools to convert the secularists into True Christianity™. Of course, as Satanists, they cannot help mentioning the unmentionables, but due to the importance of the issue, the vocabulary of the quotes below is unsuitable for women and the most sensitive True Christian™ men.
OK. The scientists found a dinosaur carcass that had perished in Noah's Flood (Genesis 7:21-22). It was so well preserved that it cannot be trillions of years old unlike claimed by the pale ontologists who study these things. In contrast, it is approximately 4000 years old based on my ponderings and Prayers.
In the white rectangular you can see the private parts that this dinosaur was shamelessly flaunting on the moment of its death. In magnification they looked like this (panel D in the image below).
This means that they had intercourse, i.e., made love, through the same orifice that is the anus. That is, they only had ANAL SEX. Buttsex. Homosexual sex.
This means that this nasty anus had "lips" and "bulges" to increase the unnatural pleasures of this sinful creatures. No surprise that they perished soon after the Flood due to the impossibility of their sexual debauchery.
As nauseating as this is, this means that the Bible is the only correct source of knowledge and that these results prove its inerrancy.
As you can see, these two brontotyrannosaurides are sniffing each other's anuses in preparation to anal sex. No wonder the nerdy young sodomites often study to become pale ontologists and are so eager to examine these bones that are often several centuries old. They want to justify their own cravings for anal buttsex by referring to these beasts. Based on Biblical warnings, we can now determine that anal sex was a practice between men and women and these beasts, as well, as why else would Jesus have prohibited it?
Leviticus 20:15-16
And if a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death: and ye shall slay the beast. And if a woman approach unto any beast, and lie down thereto, thou shalt kill the woman, and the beast: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
No wonder the dinosaurs were all put to death. This gives new, horrible insights into the newest Pixar Film "the Good Dinosaur". Here's an image showing exactly the same situation, a dinosaur sniffing the anus of a future sodomite in insatiable lust.
There we have it. The biggest mystery of modern Creation Science has been solved. The Bible rules unchallenged. Do not hesitate. Spread these good news in the Mall, on the Street, and in Republican conventions.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
1st preserved dinosaur butthole is 'perfect' and 'unique,' paleontologist says
In the white rectangular you can see the private parts that this dinosaur was shamelessly flaunting on the moment of its death. In magnification they looked like this (panel D in the image below).
But these aren't mere buttholes, these are cloacae, or vents, that have been pleasantly described as the "Swiss Army knife of buttholes," by Science Alert. Used for breeding, defecating, and urinating, these vents are found in vertebrates and are truly multi-purposed.
The dinosaur's derrière is so well preserved, researchers could see the remnants of two small bulges by its "back door," which might have housed musky scent glands that the reptile possibly used during courtship
None of the reproductive soft tissues (like a penis) were preserved. So the researchers can't say whether the dinosaur was male or female. Even so, this dinosaur likely had copulatory sex, unlike some birds that bump butts when they do a "cloacal kiss" during reproduction, Vinther said.
- Dinosaurs could not have had buttsex before the Fall from Grace (Genesis 3:6) as unnatural sexual practices did not exist in the original Paradise. This means that they have to be about 6300 years old or younger.
- Dinosaurs were subject to the Fall from Grace similar to all other Creatures as proven by... Romans 8:22 - For we know that the whole creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together until now.
As you can see, these two brontotyrannosaurides are sniffing each other's anuses in preparation to anal sex. No wonder the nerdy young sodomites often study to become pale ontologists and are so eager to examine these bones that are often several centuries old. They want to justify their own cravings for anal buttsex by referring to these beasts. Based on Biblical warnings, we can now determine that anal sex was a practice between men and women and these beasts, as well, as why else would Jesus have prohibited it?
Leviticus 20:15-16
And if a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death: and ye shall slay the beast. And if a woman approach unto any beast, and lie down thereto, thou shalt kill the woman, and the beast: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
No wonder the dinosaurs were all put to death. This gives new, horrible insights into the newest Pixar Film "the Good Dinosaur". Here's an image showing exactly the same situation, a dinosaur sniffing the anus of a future sodomite in insatiable lust.
There we have it. The biggest mystery of modern Creation Science has been solved. The Bible rules unchallenged. Do not hesitate. Spread these good news in the Mall, on the Street, and in Republican conventions.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
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