Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

[Johny Joe Hold]

If ever there was proof we need to carry weapons everywhere, including in church, it was this story from England.

A younger woman met an older woman in a church group. The older woman offered to loan money to the younger woman but changed her mind. Off came the older woman's head.

This kind of gruesome crime happened because Satan slipped into that church. We tend to think of LBC church as a safe place. But Satan is always trying to get in the door. We must be on guard. Firearms are needed against Satan's army.

https://www.christianpost.com/news/woman-sentenced-for-decapitating-friend-from-church-group.html

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

A younger woman met an older woman in a church group. The older woman offered to loan money to the younger woman but changed her mind. Off came the older woman's head.

There has been no public service announcement to advise people to avoid that particular church group, or even to tell them which church it is. This is disgraceful! It does sound very typical of the sort of person who goes to the Church of England, though.

I get the impression that she didn't carry out the beheading actually in the church. This makes sense, as I believe many Anglican vicars employ security people called "church wardens" to be on the lookout for concealed swords, always a worry in the sort of rough districts that still have Anglican "churches". As the woman killed was from one of the Ninja or neighbouring races, it looks very much as though Matthew 26:52 may apply here.

[Unfalsifiable]

Re: Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

I noticed that too, Sister Jo. Very subtly not mentioning anything about the type of Church.


It wasn't Landover, that's for sure. That money would never have even been considered for some random woman's house renovation. It would have been in the jet fund. And as for the will? That would have been made out to Pastor Zeke before she walked through the door.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

I noticed that too, Sister Jo.

Please don't call me "Jo", dear. Thank you for your consideration. In return, I will not address you as "Falsie".

No, it was definitely not Landover Baptist Church which (wisely) eschews English real estate.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

I'm trying to imagine the introduction?

Vicar
— Hello, this is Miss Thanatogenos¹

Thanatogenos
— [smiles] Please, call me Aimée²

Vicar
— [nods] Dowsable³ ..well, I'll leave you two to chat [blinks]

Aimée
— Lend me £242,000⁴

Dowsable
— Yes

NEXT DAY

Aimée
— Have you brought the wedge?

Dowsable
— [apprehensive] No, I ……… ……… ………

One thing I noticed was that the younger was a "spiritual healer" which, since this was not a Baptist Church or (if it is) not a genuine one, very likely means witch. Jesus is the healer, not the Thanatogenoses of this world. It's also unusual for healers to remove heads. How can anyone look at these things and still imagine there's an actual message in every false church? One may as well look for random acts of kindness in atheistic Japan and thereby declare their emperor God! Some of them do, of course, officially, though, he isn't.

1. Not her real name
2. This isn't real, either
3. Pseudonyms used to respect privacy
4. I certainly had NOT ANTICIPATED such a sum was involved!!
4. Thought maybe £50

[Dennis Lukes]

Re: Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

If the headline people actually bothered to read the article, she was sentenced for killing her friend, not beheading her. Nowhere does the article indicate that decapitation was the actual method of death, merely that the the head was removed at some point. She may have been beheaded postmortem. I understand this was the fate of Oliver Cromwell, so there's some precedent for this sort of thing in Merrie Olde Englande. Therefore the craniectomy would only fall under the category of corpse desecration. Sister Joanna (NOT "Jo"), does your heathen nation consider that to be a crime?

No, the main issue here is immigration. Usually they're the ones decapitating white people, but hey if Chong had stayed where she belonged she wouldn't have gotten chopped up.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

She may have been beheaded postmortem.

I understood from the piece that that was certain. I don't want to speculate on the precise timeline though, for reasons of good taste.

Oliver Cromwell

I suppose the Cromwells are an "interesting" family. Did you know the precedent for Gitmo was established by Oliver, using the Channel Islands for an identical purpose? But what a walking horror story he was. The person I'd least like to meet from history. And let's be frank: there's some pretty stiff competition. Why can't people just leave things alone?

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

Therefore the craniectomy would only fall under the category of corpse desecration. Sister Joanna (NOT "Jo"), does your heathen nation consider that to be a crime?

I think it might fall into the category of "Prevention of the lawful and decent burial of a dead body", Brother ... though presumably not if you arranged for both the head and torso to be buried lawfully and decently?

I believe you are right about Oliver Cromwell. At least, someone was dug up, beheaded and then reburied elsewhere. This has always seemed harsh treatment for the corpse of a man who basically meant well, and was responsible for the death of the perfectly ghastly king Charles I. Mais où sont les Cromwells d'antan?

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Woman Beheads Friend She Met in Church

Dead. What we enjoy as inhabitants of continents declared free: Greenland, Australia, Antarctica, Pacific & Atlantic island realms, The United States, Canada, vast resources, Norway, Lapland (is that even a place by savage standards?) look no further than the promise of God to bless whom He chose.