My routine sin inspection at my daughter's house uncovered something particularly sinister this week--a hula hoop artfully hidden in the garage beneath some cross-linked polyethylene tubing. Apparently my daughter and her hellbound husband secretly gave the despicable toy to my ten-year-old granddaughter as a birthday present earlier this week.
"What's the big deal if she has a hula hoop? They're harmless and fun," my whore of a daughter said dismissively.
"We might as well break her hymen right now," I screamed, pinning my granddaughter down. The cries and protests of my daugther and granddaughter moved me, and I restrained myself by simply beating them.
Friends, hula hoops essentially train children how to fornicate.

The above picture infuriates me. The little girl is swivelling her hips and becoming excited and uncontrollable. She is overcome with lust. More than likely she will grow up to be a harlot, all because of a "harmless" and "fun" toy. Here are some more youngsters on the fast track to being pimped by garishly-dressed Negroes.

I am old enough to remember the hula hoop craze. One couldn't step outside without seeing throngs of children and adults gyrating and shimmying. I still have nightmares. It was like being trapped inside of a porno film. Surely it was only by the grace of God that the rampant hula hoop orgy subsided.
My brothers and sisters in Christ, help me to preserve the integrity of young girls' cooters everywhere. If you discover a hula hoop, destroy it with a pair of garden clippers as I did. The future of our great nation depends on it. Praise Jesus.
"What's the big deal if she has a hula hoop? They're harmless and fun," my whore of a daughter said dismissively.
"We might as well break her hymen right now," I screamed, pinning my granddaughter down. The cries and protests of my daugther and granddaughter moved me, and I restrained myself by simply beating them.
Friends, hula hoops essentially train children how to fornicate.

The above picture infuriates me. The little girl is swivelling her hips and becoming excited and uncontrollable. She is overcome with lust. More than likely she will grow up to be a harlot, all because of a "harmless" and "fun" toy. Here are some more youngsters on the fast track to being pimped by garishly-dressed Negroes.

I am old enough to remember the hula hoop craze. One couldn't step outside without seeing throngs of children and adults gyrating and shimmying. I still have nightmares. It was like being trapped inside of a porno film. Surely it was only by the grace of God that the rampant hula hoop orgy subsided.
My brothers and sisters in Christ, help me to preserve the integrity of young girls' cooters everywhere. If you discover a hula hoop, destroy it with a pair of garden clippers as I did. The future of our great nation depends on it. Praise Jesus.
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