2005 – Israel officially hands over Jericho to Palestinian control, in direct violations of God's commandment to kill everyone in it:
1995 – Mississippi formally ratifies the Thirteenth Amendment, becoming the last state to approve the abolition of slavery. The town of Freehold will NEVER ratify this bit of unBiblical juditial activism.
1988 – Iran-Contra Affair: Lieutenant Colonel Oliver North and Vice Admiral John Poindexter are indicted on charges of conspiracy to defraud the United States. They rejoice in being persecuted for Jesus' sake, as the Bible commands.
1978 - God punishes France with the 5th largest oil spill in history.
1970 - The complete text of the New English Bible was published, simultaneously, by the Oxford and Cambridge Presses. A disgusting heresy: if God had wanted us to read the New English Bible, God would have written the New English Bible. Instead, He wrote the King James Version.
These heretics have no faith in God. If they believed God was omnipotent, they would understand that God does not need people to write and translate and interpret for Him. These heretics believe that God is so puny He can't even write a book by Himself!
1968 - My Lai: "U.S. infantrymen had killed 128 Communists in a bloody day-long battle" according to Stars and Stripes. 11th Infantry Brigade is issued a special commendation for its victory. After reading reports of alleged killings, Colin Powel states "In direct refutation of this portrayal is the fact that relations between American soldiers and the Vietnamese people are excellent."
1963 – Mount Agung erupts on Bali killing 11,000 sinners.
1952 - The first religious program on TV, "This Week in Religion," debuted on Dumont television. It was the only ecumenical program of TV's early religious offerings, and ran for only two years, last airing in October 1954, probably due to censorship by the communist Eisenhower administration. Tele-evangelism has come a long way from those dark days.
1921 - Russia: Bolsheviks stage final bloody assault on rebelling Kronstadt sailors. Trotsky executes all involved, earning the title of "Red Butcher." Later he too would rebel against the ruler God had chosen (Stalin) and would be beaten to death with an ice-pick. Lesson of the day: obey all rulers, even Lenin and Stalin, because they were put into power by God:
1915 - Birth of Dr. Robert H. Bowman, missions pioneer. In 1945, along with John Broger and William J. Roberts, Bowman helped found the Far East Broadcasting Company. Today FEBC reaches thousands of Pacific island clusters with the Gospel through Christian radio.
1865 – War of Northern Aggression: The Battle of Averasborough
1850 - Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter is published. God does not demand fashion changes for adulterers. He demands death by stoning.
1849 - God blesses Reverend James E Smith: he becomes a father at age 100 with a woman 64 years younger.
1792 – King Gustav III of Sweden is shot. God's pre-emptive punishment for Sweden being the poster child of Euro-socialists and liberals everywhere. Hey libs, if Euro-socialism is so great, why can't it stop your kings from getting shot?
1621 - Birth of George Neumark, German educator. Twice in life he lost everything: once by robbers and once by fire. As a poet, Neumark is best remembered as author of the hymn, "If Thou But Suffer God to Guide Thee." (He obviously didn't, seeing as God sent robbers and fires to punish him).
1617 - Savage indian Pocahontas dies on ship George at Gravesend. Proof that women on ships leads to disaster. Probably God's pre-emptive wrath for the terrible Disney movie.
1521 – Ferdinand Magellan reaches the Philippines. Finds lots of wonderfully submissive women who steal all of his shoes.
1190 – 150 Jews and jewesses commit the sin of self-murder at Clifford's Tower, York.
37 – Caligula becomes Roman Emperor. A proto-neoconservative, he gave us the saying "Let them hate us, so long as they fear us". The fact that he was slandered by a pornographic film only hightens his glory.
Among Caligula's achievements was the liberation of Mauretania, which may not be a lot but it's more than Obama has conquered. Also, in order to keep government money from being spent on welfare, which makes the serving classes get uppity, he spent it on palaces for himself. Perhaps this was inspired by Jesus:
597 BC - 2 Kings 25:
After a fierce, prolonged siege, the walls of Jerusalem are breached and the city, along with its beautiful Temple, destroyed. The Ark of the Covenant disappears. The Temple furnishings are carted back to Babylon, justifying the Iraq War. The cream of Israel's youth (ew....I didn't write this, answers.com did), including a young man named Daniel who would gain fame and recognition in a lion's den, were carried away from their home and spiritual center. In the stark words of 2 Kings 25:21, "So Judah went into captivity, away from her land."
Why did God allow such a horrible thing to happen? Because the king was evil. Proof:
But you must destroy it and everything in it, to show that it now belongs to the Lord. The woman Rahab helped the spies we sent, so protect her and the others who are inside her house. But kill everyone else in the town. - Joshua 6:17
1998 – Pope John Paul II asks God for forgiveness for the inactivity and silence of "some Roman Catholics" during the Holocaust. As for Catholic nazis, such as Hitler himself, who paid his dues to the vatican up to his death....No apologies.1995 – Mississippi formally ratifies the Thirteenth Amendment, becoming the last state to approve the abolition of slavery. The town of Freehold will NEVER ratify this bit of unBiblical juditial activism.
1988 – Iran-Contra Affair: Lieutenant Colonel Oliver North and Vice Admiral John Poindexter are indicted on charges of conspiracy to defraud the United States. They rejoice in being persecuted for Jesus' sake, as the Bible commands.
1978 - God punishes France with the 5th largest oil spill in history.
1970 - The complete text of the New English Bible was published, simultaneously, by the Oxford and Cambridge Presses. A disgusting heresy: if God had wanted us to read the New English Bible, God would have written the New English Bible. Instead, He wrote the King James Version.
These heretics have no faith in God. If they believed God was omnipotent, they would understand that God does not need people to write and translate and interpret for Him. These heretics believe that God is so puny He can't even write a book by Himself!
1968 - My Lai: "U.S. infantrymen had killed 128 Communists in a bloody day-long battle" according to Stars and Stripes. 11th Infantry Brigade is issued a special commendation for its victory. After reading reports of alleged killings, Colin Powel states "In direct refutation of this portrayal is the fact that relations between American soldiers and the Vietnamese people are excellent."
1963 – Mount Agung erupts on Bali killing 11,000 sinners.
1952 - The first religious program on TV, "This Week in Religion," debuted on Dumont television. It was the only ecumenical program of TV's early religious offerings, and ran for only two years, last airing in October 1954, probably due to censorship by the communist Eisenhower administration. Tele-evangelism has come a long way from those dark days.
1921 - Russia: Bolsheviks stage final bloody assault on rebelling Kronstadt sailors. Trotsky executes all involved, earning the title of "Red Butcher." Later he too would rebel against the ruler God had chosen (Stalin) and would be beaten to death with an ice-pick. Lesson of the day: obey all rulers, even Lenin and Stalin, because they were put into power by God:
Romans 13:1-3: Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you.
All leaders, even Stalin and Hitler, punish only wrongdoers and commend only the good. THere are no bad leaders, only bad citizens.Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.
For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you.
1915 - Birth of Dr. Robert H. Bowman, missions pioneer. In 1945, along with John Broger and William J. Roberts, Bowman helped found the Far East Broadcasting Company. Today FEBC reaches thousands of Pacific island clusters with the Gospel through Christian radio.
1865 – War of Northern Aggression: The Battle of Averasborough
1850 - Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter is published. God does not demand fashion changes for adulterers. He demands death by stoning.
1849 - God blesses Reverend James E Smith: he becomes a father at age 100 with a woman 64 years younger.
1792 – King Gustav III of Sweden is shot. God's pre-emptive punishment for Sweden being the poster child of Euro-socialists and liberals everywhere. Hey libs, if Euro-socialism is so great, why can't it stop your kings from getting shot?
1621 - Birth of George Neumark, German educator. Twice in life he lost everything: once by robbers and once by fire. As a poet, Neumark is best remembered as author of the hymn, "If Thou But Suffer God to Guide Thee." (He obviously didn't, seeing as God sent robbers and fires to punish him).
1617 - Savage indian Pocahontas dies on ship George at Gravesend. Proof that women on ships leads to disaster. Probably God's pre-emptive wrath for the terrible Disney movie.
1521 – Ferdinand Magellan reaches the Philippines. Finds lots of wonderfully submissive women who steal all of his shoes.
1190 – 150 Jews and jewesses commit the sin of self-murder at Clifford's Tower, York.
Typical pro-suicide propaganda. Next time a teenager commits suicide, remember that it's the Jew's fault.
Among Caligula's achievements was the liberation of Mauretania, which may not be a lot but it's more than Obama has conquered. Also, in order to keep government money from being spent on welfare, which makes the serving classes get uppity, he spent it on palaces for himself. Perhaps this was inspired by Jesus:
Mark 14:7-11:
7There came unto him a woman having an alabaster box of very precious ointment, and poured it on his head, as he sat at meat.
8But when his disciples saw it, they had indignation, saying, To what purpose is this waste?
9For this ointment might have been sold for much, and given to the poor.
10When Jesus understood it, he said unto them, Why trouble ye the woman? for she hath wrought a good work upon me.
11For ye have the poor always with you; but me ye have not always.
Indeed, today the poor are still with us, but sadly our president is nothing like Caligula.7There came unto him a woman having an alabaster box of very precious ointment, and poured it on his head, as he sat at meat.
8But when his disciples saw it, they had indignation, saying, To what purpose is this waste?
9For this ointment might have been sold for much, and given to the poor.
10When Jesus understood it, he said unto them, Why trouble ye the woman? for she hath wrought a good work upon me.
11For ye have the poor always with you; but me ye have not always.
597 BC - 2 Kings 25:
After a fierce, prolonged siege, the walls of Jerusalem are breached and the city, along with its beautiful Temple, destroyed. The Ark of the Covenant disappears. The Temple furnishings are carted back to Babylon, justifying the Iraq War. The cream of Israel's youth (ew....I didn't write this, answers.com did), including a young man named Daniel who would gain fame and recognition in a lion's den, were carried away from their home and spiritual center. In the stark words of 2 Kings 25:21, "So Judah went into captivity, away from her land."
Why did God allow such a horrible thing to happen? Because the king was evil. Proof:
5Jehoiakim was twenty-five years old when he became king, (young leaders are bad leaders) and he reigned eleven years in Jerusalem; and he did evil in the sight of the LORD his God. (What evil did he do? It doesn't matter, the fact that God punished him proves he was evil.)
6Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon came up against him and bound him with bronze chains to take him to Babylon.
7Nebuchadnezzar also brought some of the articles of the house of the LORD to Babylon and put them in his temple at Babylon. -2 Chronicles 36:5-8
6Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon came up against him and bound him with bronze chains to take him to Babylon.
7Nebuchadnezzar also brought some of the articles of the house of the LORD to Babylon and put them in his temple at Babylon. -2 Chronicles 36:5-8
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