My Girlfriend and I Love Each other Very Much....

[TheLordsOwn]

And we were thinking of consummating our relationship with sexual intercourse on the 14th of February (St. Valentine is a personal hero of mine).

My knowledge of the Bible is not as clear cut as I would like it to one day be, but what are Jesus' views on consummating a relationship in this fashion? We will have been dating for over 2 months (!!!) by this time next month and I believe I am finally ready to take the next step.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

And we were thinking of consummating our relationship with sexual intercourse on the 14th of February (St. Valentine is a personal hero of mine).

My knowledge of the Bible is not as clear cut as I would like it to one day be, but what are Jesus' views on consummating a relationship in this fashion? We will have been dating for over 2 months (!!!) by this time next month and I believe I am finally ready to take the next step.

Saints are Catholic zombies, so if one of them is your hero, you are one step from HELL. Fornication will not help your case and I will not be a party to it. How old are you both?

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

First you will need to get legally married under the eyes of GOD.

Then you should cut a small hole in a white sheet. Place the sheet betwixt you and your new wife (hole strategically placed). Have your new wife lay as still as possible whilst you go about your business. This should all take place in under 5 minutes. Try not to enjoy yourself too much and try not to see her in her nakedness. Sex should be looked upon as a tiresome chore.

Sex is not to be enjoyed or exalted but to make babies.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

You may "love" each other, but since you obviously hate God, and God is love, you are not capable of genuine love at all.

[Brother Terrence]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

Obviously that whore you are going to use as your vehicle to hell is not a virgin in His eyes, or she would not have been allowed to tempt you as she has. She is surely sent to you by satan to lure you away from the Kingdom of God. She is stealing your love, which is the very thing you should be showering our Lord with. Send her to Freehold immediatly so we may begin the process of "deprogramming" her. And you sir, go tithe, NOW!

[SUV]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

"My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much...."

What??????? This is some of the sickest excrement I've ever seen perpetuated upon our Godly board. Even overlooking your lack of SpacingSkills

If JESUS tells us Bibically (oh GOD, I Hope I've got this one Right!) to treat our own Families like swill and to desert them...you are going to love.....love.....just LURVE......... your........... "girlfriend?!"

Pastor, I'm Ill and I fain to lie doon

[AXavierB]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

The Bible tells us not to engage in premarital sex. If you and your girlfriend commit this heinous act on Treason Season of all times, you're getting a one-way ticket to the fiery pits of hell.

[Billy Ram]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

The devil can appear as an angel of light.Tell this Jezebel begone you demon.

[StarrKingGrad]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

Saints are Catholic zombies

Saints are mentioned 98 times in the King James version Bible, none disapprovingly, so I should think that you might want to rethink your position on this. Personally, I think there are saints all around us: those who shelter the homeless, teach our children, and spread the word of God's love and compassion for all persons of all races, genders, creeds, national origins, religions, and sexual orientations.

Interestingly enough, though they weren't Catholic, there literally were saints who were zombies if you believe the Bible stories:

And, behold, the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent; And the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints which slept arose, And came out of the graves after his resurrection, and went into the holy city, and appeared unto many.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: My Girlfriend and I Love Eachother Very Much....

Saints are mentioned 98 times in the King James version Bible, none disapprovingly, so I should think that you might want to rethink your position on this.

No, I don't. GOD appoints saints, not Pope Ratsinger-the Nazi. Next?

Personally, I think there are saints all around us: those who shelter the homeless, teach our children, and spread the word of God's love and compassion for all persons of all races, genders, creeds, national origins, religions, and sexual orientations.

When did GOD become obliged to care what you think or become politically correct? Where is all of this in the Bible? It isn't there. Just as one example, GOD says homosexuals are to be put to death.

Leviticus 18:22
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.

20:13
If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

Interestingly enough, though they weren't Catholic, there literally were saints who were zombies if you believe the Bible stories:

Not surprisingly, we do tend to believe the Bible stories.