Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

[Johny Joe Hold]

Our city of Freehold is known far and wide as a place where True Christians™ are blessed by God with prosperity. One way the outside public see this is in the beautiful clothes women from Freehold wear.

Now one of our great assets is being threatened. Most of the women in Freehold wear mink coats in winter. They really like the look of mink.

Men like their wives and daughters to wear mink because, as is obvious, mink are animals. Mink coats are a symbol of man's dominance over all animals as is God's wish and intention. Freehold is not one of those cities that brags about its vegetarianism and "animal rights." We want minks to be born and used for the purpose they were intended, to dress the beautiful women of Freehold.

Unfortunately, the pandemic kills minks. It spreads rapidly and some mink ranches have been shut down. I'm expecting President Trump to use much of his remaining time in office to solve this mink disease problem.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/the-mink-pandemic-just-keeps-getting-worse/ar-BB1cbyzy

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

I'm expecting President Trump to use much of his remaining time in office to solve this mink disease problem.

These last 3 weeks are a gift from Jesus. Imagine the possibilities if you were the most powerful man on earth for 3 weeks - you can do anything, like Jesus - what would you do?!

But back on the topic of minks... minks's. Excuse me, minks'es. On the topic of minks'es I have had some trouble with google search but nevertheless found an alternative to mink: skank is apparently very popular among the kids on the inter-tubes nowadays.

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

My friend Earl who owns and runs many of the very many Freehold fur farms (Genesis Furs Iowa, Inc.) will NOT cull his minks! More or less all are infected with kung flu, but I am sure he could get rid of it is he wash the coats good enough after he has very humanely anally electrocuted them. Just in time for the Freehold Fashion Week, probably the only in the world where clothing without fur, is strictly prohibited.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

Oh my goodness, is this the blood diamonds story all over again but with added imaginary peril? I hope there is no "danger" from our existing coats and lined gloves, made from healthy pre-covidian mink/minks or whatever the plural of a mink is? At this time of year, we ladies need to keep toasty warm during those chilly journeys between the front driveway and the entrance hall.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

Oh my goodness, is this the blood diamonds story all over again but with added imaginary peril? I hope there is no "danger" from our existing coats and lined gloves, made from healthy pre-covidian mink/minks or whatever the plural of a mink is? At this time of year, we ladies need to keep toasty warm during those chilly journeys between the front driveway and the entrance hall.

We can thank Jesus it is still possible to buy quality mink. This one is $7,000 and would keep one of our Landover Baptist ladies warm:

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

We can thank Jesus it is still possible to buy quality mink. This one is $7,000 and would keep one of our Landover Baptist ladies warm

I mean, it looks nice but how many minks died for this? Is the interior lining made of the softest most delicate baby scrotum? Discerning buyers will pay more than $7000.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

I mean, it looks nice but how many minks died for this?

Well, if they had the covid they were probably glad to die.

Mink is fine for everyday wear, but for special occasions I much prefer Siberian sable - warm, lightweight and so glossy. Plus, at time of writing, guaranteed pandemic-free.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

Well, if they had the covid they were probably glad to die.

Mink is fine for everyday wear, but for special occasions I much prefer Siberian sable - warm, lightweight and so glossy. Plus, at time of writing, guaranteed pandemic-free.

Sable is indeed exquisite and lustrous, dearest Sister in Christ, and it is remarkable that as a mere woman you would be familiar with such rarities - once again we can see how True Christendom™ enhances the cognitive capabilities of females.

However, one Created kind has even better fur: the sea otter! The best part of this product is that it is totally domestic and the Godly U.S. of A. supports a good population of these vermin ready to be harvested! A nice article about this useful beast was recently published in the Godly Answers magazine (part of the Answers in Genesis franchise - there is even an audio option for the illiterate teens and women).

Sea otter fur is one of the densest and most amazing furs in the animal kingdom. Sea otters, unlike other mammals that live in the sea, do not have any blubber or fat to keep them warm. Staying warm is especially critical in the cold Californian and Alaskan coastal waters... The hairs of their fur have grooves and actually interlock. This creates an airtight compartment, which not only provides insulation but also traps air to increase buoyancy.

Sea otter coats are now rarities, the one depicted above is a vintage model from the 1930's after the birth of our Lord, our Redeemer Jesus Christ! Of course, such hair could not have developed by random chance mutation from snake scales, unlike the evil lotionists claim! Furthermore, God recommends the use of animal skins and fur! We are expecting and increas in sea otter hunting permits during the Second Term of President Trump!

Genesis 3:21
Unto Adam also and to his wife did the LORD God make coats of skins, and clothed them.

In brief, I highly recommend sea otter coats for the coldest winters and the sable fur for festivities, such as President Trump's inauguration for four more years on January 20, 2021! God bless Him!


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

Thank you for your educational post, Brother Professor Dr White, Sir.

Sea otter coats are now rarities, the one depicted above is a vintage model from the 1930's after the birth of our Lord, our Redeemer Jesus Christ!

That would need restyling, of course. At the moment the ends of the arms look as though someone forgot to take the otter's back feet off.

[Isabella White]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

Thank you for your educational post, Brother Professor Dr White, Sir. That would need restyling, of course. At the moment the ends of the arms look as though someone forgot to take the otter's back feet off.

Oh, how very true this is, dear Sister Joanna! One must not overlook the importance of looking stylishly elegant, in a design that is currently fashionable, as you shall see below:

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

I think everyone here is misguided about the best fur coats.

First off, minks are vile creatures with a nasty disposition - they would sooner eat your children and pets than clear out your chicken coop (let alone naw on your ankles). Denmark led the way in stupidity by killing and burying 17 million of them - only to have them rise up in their shallow graves and send mail-in votes for Biden. They would have been better off letting them die of the Rona and then chlorinate them and harvest the pelts, or better yet, let them get "herd immunity". The whole thing reminds me of the attempt to dynamite that beached whale in Oregon fifty years ago. God did give the mink a nice pelt - a reward for humans to kill them.

The best coats are made from clubbed baby seals - warm, soft, and waterproof. Seal coats are perfect for drilling oil in ANWR (if you're a Democrat you're going to need that oil to make those cheap polyester fiber fill coats to keep warm).

[WWJDnow]

Re: Pandemic in Mink Will Affect Freehold

Cavalier King Charles Spaniel puppies also make great fur coats. Plus, they're a menace who fought on the Catholic side in the English Civil War.