I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishing

[Mary Etheldreda]

Today I learned that Finland does not exist. It's a lie. You see, Japan and Russia got together after WWII to fabricate a grand conspiracy to unleash upon the world. Claiming there exists a random country where the Baltic Sea really is functions to cover up Japan's unique privilege of unlimited fishing and whaling there, which they can do without international oversight because no one knows they're there. In return, Japan gives Russia some of the food caught. Russians, being mostly drunk, make poor farmers, despite so many rich resources, and are always looking for a handout, even from slanty-eyed train engineers.

Why would Russia fabricate such a tale? Because following the second world war, there was a dire shortage of food. Japan also was desperate. Japan approached Russia to give them secret rights to fish in the Baltic Sea, which borders Russia's northwest. To cover up this secret arrangement, they worked together to build the Trans-Siberian Railway which goes all the way from the Baltic Sea to Japan. In repayment for the secret, unregulated fishing rights, the Japanese give food to Russians along the railway.


Proof:

• People who go to Finland only go to Helsinki, which is in eastern Sweden, and no one notices.
• Most of "Finland" is forest, so no one cares that it's not really there.
• The Finnish language is suspiciously closely related to the Japanese language, while the culture is nearly identical to Swedish.
• Estonians who claim to see the lights of Helsinki actually see Japanese fishing boats.
• The $13 billion so-called Helsinki to Tallinn Tunnel is in reality a rouse to raise money to use to bribe Google and GPS companies to continue modifying maps to show a landmass where none actually exists.
• No one learns about Finland in school, they only hear about it on the internet or through rumors.
• Nokia was invented as an excuse to do business with Russia, a communist country at the time of the deal.
• The name of the country is an homage to the Japanese obsession with eating sushi. What do fish have? Fins. What do they name their pretend country? Finland.
• This real map, taken by a weather balloon. The person who exposed this photo is in hiding for his life because Google Maps will stop at nothing to find him and put him in their tri-colored prison of giant pipes.

I am so livid that my country lied to me until President Trump made it safe to share this picture and share this information. Former "President" Obama should be ashamed of himself, but we all know what a nut he is for pretending garbage about countries, like countries he was born in, countries he's a citizen of, countries who's leaders you should bow to, etc. I am so grateful to Jesus that I home educate my children. They will NOT be ignorant like so many of their peers.

[Roland]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

Hello Mary,

Could this be some conspiracy by the whalers? As they are able to contain these huge creatures I surmise they would easily subdue the relatively tiny politicians and bureaucrats.

They wouldn´t get away with it if it weren´t for a distraction. Thinking about that: Perhaps the Faeröer Islands are that distraction. It is in the same region (Not the USA, most likely Europe) and it has some pretty nasty tiny-whale killings being filmed and put on Youtube:

Why would anyone take a look at Fin-land if they can meet their social outrage criteria somewhere else by taking on a small group of people at some tiny island group? The Fin-land sea seems to be a lot bigger than the Faeröer Islands. Cui bono?

Kind regards,

Roland

[Titus Templeton]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

More and more reasons lately to start another war with Japan. They are so small and weak it's like shooting children.

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

All I see is a giant tallywhacker, it makes me want to choke! Can the moderators delete this picture, seriously it's disgusting. #pervert #offensive #christianvalues #suckmyhairychoad

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

You know a country is fake when songs are written about them by famous comedy companies.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

This is excellent Creation Science by a woman. In fact, being accepted by Jesus apparently increases the IQ of genetic females exponentially so that most True Christian™ Ladies even surpass regular sinner men in their cognitive capacities. Again, a nation committed to fornication has been proven to be, in fact, imaginary.

Now we must ask why the nation of the fictional Sinland is so degenerated. First, we know that all Creation is constantly degenerating (Romans 8:22). Ever since the Fall (Genesis 3:6), harmful mutations have accumulated and if Jesus did not come very soon (he will; Revelation 22:20), humans would face extinction. How, then is it possible that the nation of Finland is even more degenerated than the rest of the Earth's Disk?



Bestiality is the only reasonable conclusion.

Deuteronomy 27:21
Cursed be he that lieth with any manner of beast. And all the people shall say, Amen.

Amen! God does not accept bestiality but the Finnish people have legalized it.

A naked man had submitted himself to be copulated by a 250-kilo boar.
The police suspect the man of disturbing the public peace, of aggravated drunken driving and serious endangering of traffic safety. As for having sex with the pig, the law doesn’t have an opinion.
In Finland, it’s legal to have sex with an animal.

Ergo, that nation is no longer human but consist of hybrid abominations causing great confusion.
Leviticus 18:23
Neither shalt thou lie with any beast to defile thyself therewith: neither shall any woman stand before a beast to lie down thereto: it is confusion.

Of course, there is an exception to this rule of genetic entropy. 241 years ago the few remaining unblemished genes that still remained in the genome of some few True Baptist Christians™ were brought together apparently by the Mercy of Christ (Jonah 4:2) and the American subspecies was born and finally produced the Caucasian heterosexual American Male that still retains many of the characteristics that God originally gave Adam.





The likeness is unmistakable! So different from the average Finnish person depicted above.




Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[handmaiden]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

Dear Brother Doctor Professor White;

Is that second picture from the animatranic-whatcha-ma-callit thing that Disney is installing in its Hall of Presidents? It looks very life-like, but the skin is not quite the right kissed-by-the-Glory-of-God presidential shade.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

For example, who but the Japanese, inventors of anime, toilet themed restaurants, square watermelon, and whatever the heck this is,



to invent a "sport" so ridiculous they could only fit it in so-called "Finland."

Wife Carrying Championships
You've got to be kidding me!

Everyone knows a real man doesn't cart his wife around. How else could he expect a warm dinner and clean home when he returns?

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishing

I've just been listening to Sibelius and by coincidence there were some notes including the following excerpt from a "Finnish" epic. In the first highlighted section we see internal evidence that once beyond Lapland, borders become very wide of the mark. The exact width is not specified (I will address this next) but in case of there being supposed between Russia and "Finland" a border, what is expressed here.—.and as a matter of national identity which all these epics are.—.is an understanding that outside Lapland the Russian border veers off by a wide margin; east or west, one hundred miles or more or less who knows? Let's go with veers off east by 275 miles at the point of greatest deviation which brings me to Japan.

The second highlighted section presents a meretricious display unlikely to deceive even a peahen and yet this wretched sister is deceived. In multiple theatres and using multiple props such as fruit.&.nut delicacies, yummy fabrics, embroidered stockings, silver girdles and yes she was destroyed. Deluded. Not my words. The words of the epic itself. The words of national identity. But which nation?

We've seen in the thread how these styles are much more suited to geisha as indeed is the ambience of the whole sordid episode. The distinct samurai theme, the rug snurfling, severed aortas in Seppuku endings, blue-stockinged men, is this epic lifted straight from a Japanese game show?

Or is it the other way ’round!

I present the facts. You decide.

..scroll down to
.
C59 .for original

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, with the very bluest stockings,
And with yellow hair the finest, and with shoes of finest leather,
Went his way to pay the taxes, and he went to pay the land-dues.

When he now had paid the taxes, and had also paid the land-dues,
In his sledge he quickly bounded, and upon the sledge he mounted,
And began to journey homeward, and to travel to his country.

And he drove, and rattled onward, and he travelled on his journey,
Traversing the heath of Väinö, and his clearing made aforetime.

And by chance a maiden met him, with her yellow hair all flowing,
There upon the heath of Väinö, on his clearing made aforetime.

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, checked his sledge upon the instant,
And began a conversation, and began to talk and wheedle:

KULLERVO
“Come into my sledge, O maiden,
“Rest upon the furs within it.”

FIRST MAIDEN
“In the sledge may Death now enter,
“On thy furs be Sickness seated.”

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, with the very bluest stockings,
With his whip then struck his courser, with his beaded whip he lashed him,
Sprang the horse upon the journey, rocked the sledge, the road was traversed.

And by chance a maiden met him, walking on, with shoes of leather,
O’er the lakes extended surface, and across the open water.

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, checked his horse upon the instant,
And his mouth at once he opened, and began to speak as follows:

KULLERVO
“Come into my sledge, O fair one,
“Pride of earth, and journey with me.”

SECOND MAIDEN
“In thy sledge may Tuoni seek thee,
“Manalainen journey with thee.”

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, with the very bluest stockings,

With his whip then struck his courser, with his beaded whip he lashed him,
Sprang the horse upon his journey, rocked the sledge, the way was shortened.
And by chance a maiden met him, wearing a tin brooch, and singing,
Out upon the heaths of Pohja, and the borders wide of Lapland.
Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, Checked his horse upon the instant,
And his mouth at once he opened, And began to speak as follows:

KULLERVO
“Come into my sledge, O maiden,
“Underneath my rug, my dearest,
“And you there shall eat my apples,
“And shall crack my nuts in comfort.”

SISTER
“At your sledge I spit, O villain,
“Even at your sledge, O scoundrel,
“Underneath your rug is coldness,
“And within you sledge is darkness.”

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, with the very bluest stockings,
Dragged into his sledge the maiden, and into the sledge he pulled her,
And upon the furs he laid her, underneath the rug he pushed her.

SISTER
“From the sledge at once release me, leave the child in perfect freedom,
“That I hear of nothing evil, neither foul nor filthy language,
“Or upon the ground I’ll throw me, and will break the sledge to splinters,
“And will smash your sledge to atoms, break the wretched sledge to pieces!”

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, with the very bluest stockings,
opened then his hide-bound coffer, clanging raised the pictured cover,
And he showed her all his silver, out he spread the choicest fabrics,
Stockings too, all gold-embroidered, girdles all adorned with silver.

Soon the fabrics turned her dizzy, to a bride the money changed her,
And the silver it destroyed her, And the shining gold deluded.

SISTER
“Tell me now of your relations, what the brave race that you spring from,
“From a mighty race it seems me, offspring of a mighty father.”

KULLERVO
“No, my race is not a great one, not a great one, not a small one,

“I am just of middle station, Kalervo’s unhappy offspring,
“Stupid boy, and very foolish, worthless child, and good for nothing.
“Tell me now about your people, and the brave race that you spring from,
“Perhaps from a mighty race descended, offspring of a mighty father.”

SISTER
“No, my race is not a great one, not a great one, not a small one,

“I am just of middle station, Kalervo’s unhappy daughter,

“Stupid girl, and very foolish, worthless child, and good for nothing.

“When I was a little infant, living with my tender mother,

“To the wood I went for berries, neath the mountain sought for raspberries,
“On the plains I gathered strawberries, underneath the mountain, raspberries,
“Plucked by day, at night I rested, plucked for one day and a second,
“And upon the third day likewise, but the pathway home I found not,

“In the woods the pathways led me, and the footpaths to the forest.

“There I stood, and burst out weeping, wept for one day, and a second,

“And at length upon the third day, then I climbed a mighty mountain,
“To the peak of all the highest, on the peak I called and shouted,
“And the woods made answer to me, while the heaths re-echoed likewise:
“‘Do not call, O girl so senseless, shout not, void of understanding,
“‘There is no one who can hear you, none at home to hear your shouting.’

“Then upon the third and fourth days, lastly on the fifth and sixth days,

“I to take my life attempted, tried to hurl me to destruction,
“But by no means did I perish, nor could I, the wretched, perish.

“Would that I, poor wretch, had perished, hapless one, had met destruction,

“That the second year thereafter, or the third among the summers,
“I had shone forth as a grass-blade, as a lovely flower existed,

“On the ground a beauteous berry, even as a scarlet cranberry,
“Then I had not heard there horrors, Would not then have known these terrors.”

KULLERVO
“Woe my day, O me unhappy, woe to me and all my household,

“For indeed my very sister, I my mother’s child have outraged!
“Woe my father, woe my mother, woe to you, my aged parents,
“To what purpose have you reared me, reared me up to be so wretched!

“Far more happy were my fortune, had I never been born or nurtured,
“Never in the air been strengthened, never in this world had entered,
“Wrongly I by death was treated, nor disease has acted wisely,

“That they did not fall upon me, and when two nights old destroy me.”

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, at his side the black dog taking,
Tracked his path through trees to forest, where the forest rose the thickest.

But a short way had he wandered, but a little way walked onward,

When he reached the stretch of forest, recognized the spot before him,

Where he had seduced the maiden, and his mother’s child dishonored.

There the tender grass was weeping, and the lovely spot lamenting,

And the young grass was deploring, and the flowers of heath were grieving,
For the ruin of the maiden, for the mother’s child’s destruction.

Neither was the young grass sprouting, nor the flowers of heath expanding,
Nor the spot had covered over, where the evil thing had happened,
Where he had seduced the maiden, and his mother’s child dishonored.

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, grasped the sharpened sword he carried,
Looked upon the sword and turned it, and he questioned it and asked it.

And he asked the sword’s opinion, if it was disposed to slay him

To devour his guilty body, and his evil blood to swallow.

Understood the sword his meaning, understood the hero’s question,
And it answered him as follows: “Wherefore at my heart’s desire,
“Should I not thy flesh devour and drink up thy blood so evil?
“I who guiltless flesh have eaten, drank the blood of those who sinned not.”

Kullervo, Kalervo’s offspring, with the very bluest stockings,

On the ground the haft set firmly, on the heath the hilt pressed tightly,
Turned the point against his bosom, and upon the point he threw him,
Thus he found the death he sought for, cast himself into destruction.

Even so the young man perished, thus died Kullervo the hero,
Thus the hero’s life was ended, Perished thus the hapless hero.

[Bjorn Jensen]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

Also, look in history books. Ever heard of this country called "Finland" being mentioned before the 20th century? No?

Let's go straight to source, the official tourism website of this supposed country, about it's supposed capital

History of Helsinki in a nutshell

Sweden’s King Gustavus Vasa founded Helsinki on the mouth of Vantaanjoki River in 1550 to compete with Tallinn for Baltic Sea trade. The town grew slowly however, and the centre of Helsinki was moved to its current location in the 1600s.

In 1748 Sweden began construction of the Suomenlinna Maritime Fortress off the coast of Helsinki to counter the growing threat from Russia. The massive project brought additional wealth, inhabitants and merchants to the town.

You see? The Japanese just picked a random city in eastern Sweden and decided that it's the capital of "Finland".

Want more proof?

Here is an actual street sign in Helsinki:




Notice how the upper part, suppousedly in "Finnish", is complete gibberish (that could only be made up) and how the lower part is Swedish? How come there is a sign in Swedish in Finland? Because Helsinki is in Sweden, that's why, and it's not even it's real name which is actually Helsingfors




Furthermore, every other major city in "Finland", also has a Swedish name, in addition to the "Finnish" name. Why would these cities have Swedish names if they are not in Sweden?

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

It seems people are refusing to be fooled much longer.

[Brother Gonzalez]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

Fake News:

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/mar/14/finland-happiest-country-world-un-report

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

https://www.theguardian.com/world/20...orld-un-report

Liberals. Couldn't lie straight in bed. Even in that Guardian piece they have a picture of a man probably drowning himself. I was reading the attractively designed World Life Expectancy Cause Of Death: Suicide chart where the highest rated nations are coded RED and guess what? FINLAND is right in there! Worse than Serbia; worse than El Salvador, Djibouti and Iceland. Even worse than Belgium which must be a pretty depressing place to live (although the roads are quite good) but not quite as bad as Japan. The map is interactive.

http://www.worldlifeexpectancy.com/cause-of-death/suicide/by-country/

Clearly they've discovered some new, magic type of happiness that makes you want to kill yourself. Weren't the Tsars fond of hunting in Finland and giving bits of it to one another before they were all shot? Typical lefties. They just make it up as they go along.

[Evilutionist Clive]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

Today I learned that Finland does not exist. It's a lie.

Dear lady,


With all due respect, it appears to me that this forum is full of intellectual fruitcakes such as yourself. Finland is a real country. I know it because I've been there.


While we're at it, how about considering the following ideas as well?

• Maybe Santa Claus is real.
• Li'l Beau Peep is looking forward to selling her sheep.
• Anyone wants to buy the Golden Gate bridge
• Unicorns do exist.

Looks like I've been wasting my time on this forum. You all seem to be high-level trolls.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: I just learned Finland is a Russian Conspiracy to keep Americans ignorant about illegal Japanese fishi

• Unicorns do exist.

They do!

Job 39:10
Canst thou bind the unicorn with his band in the furrow? or will he harrow the valleys after thee?


Yours in Christ,

Elmer