Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

The other night, as I was getting ready to leave my office, I wandered over to one of my staff members' computers, an innocent young 21 year old Christian college student named Melissa. I had her tasked to finding vile and hateful attacks on Christmas. It is the duty of my staff to find new battlefields where this War on Christmas will be played out.

Well, she apparently found this song on YouTube called "Fist Me for Christmas", and believe me, I was shocked by its lyrics. However, I noticed she seemed to be doing her best to stifle a laugh. Personally, I don't know what could be considered "funny" about this song. First off, there is no mention of Jesus Christ. It is simply a secular "holiday" tune. Second, I was outraged that these people would glorify senseless violence during a time we should be celebrating our Lord's birth. I think it's quite obvious to everyone that "Fist me" means "Hit me". They're asking to get punched. (To be honest, after seeing this video, I did have an urge to punch all these Godmocking atheist singers!)

Watch this video and judge yourself.

[eliot mayfield]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

Must be British, the Day after Christmas they have something called "Boxing Day" I guess they all get "Lagered up" and then go out on the streets "fisting" each other with the gloves on.

Must relieve the tensions and hangovers after watching soccer all day on Christmas instead of praising Jesus.

[Talitha]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

If that's how these God-Mockers are behaving for Baby Jesus' Birthday then I will almost certainly be involved in fisting some Atheists this Christmas

[Lost Sheep McUinnean]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

Must be British, the Day after Christmas they have something called "Boxing Day" I guess they all get "Lagered up" and then go out on the streets "fisting" each other with the gloves on.

Must relieve the tensions and hangovers after watching soccer all day on Christmas instead of praising Jesus.

Talk about being punch drunk. Strange dialect too, I really don't quite get the meaning from the context.

Oh, it must be about masochism.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

If that's how these God-Mockers are behaving for Baby Jesus' Birthday then I will almost certainly be involved in fisting some Atheists this Christmas

That's the spirit Sister!

PS: don't forget to take off your Cartier watch before doing so, it could get damaged by the pounding you're going to give them.

[Talitha]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

That's the spirit Sister!

PS: don't forget to take off your Cartier watch before doing so, it could get damaged by the pounding you're going to give them.

Thank you for reminding me Brother.
The last time I did this I lost a Diamond Ring too, so this time I am prepared.

[EmilyRose]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

HAHA. Oh bless you all.

Fisting in the context of this song by no means means "punching".

Boxing day.
Historically, a day to open the Christmas box and share the contents with the poor. Hardly a day to get drunk.

It is now traditionally a time when families all come to spend time together.

[Larry Lee]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

Those God-mockers make me furious. I just want to take them aside, and say, "Jesus never fisted on Christmas, and neither should you." But would they listen?

[eliot mayfield]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

HAHA. Oh bless you all.

Fisting in the context of this song by no means means "punching".

Boxing day.
Historically, a day to open the Christmas box and share the contents with the poor. Hardly a day to get drunk.

It is now traditionally a time when families all come to spend time together.

Yes, I'm certain you throw money to the poor and they won't go get drunk!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

I thought it was lovely. The harmony was very good! I think fisting means dancing or frolicking making to and fro motions with your forearms....you know... kinda like Popeye does.

[Noah Dint]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

Would someone kindly explain what all this "fisting" is about? I don't understand it at all. The song seemed to have some sort of a sexual overtone to it. Would fisting be punching someone in the nose while copulating? I don't get it. Must be one of those Goth things...

-ND

[HTannor]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

I agree with Rev. Jim about the punching part.

I am still struggling to figure out what the crisco is for.

[Nobar King]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

I am still struggling to figure out what the crisco is for.

For making cookies?

[HTannor]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

And pie crust, Brother Nobar. But they didn't mention either in the video.

Wait, there was something about something under the christmas tree. Maybe that's where they're putting the pie.............and the cookies, of course.

[Free Market Fred]

Re: Fist Me This Christmas: Violent Secular "Christmas" Song

I thought it was lovely. The harmony was very good! I think fisting means dancing or frolicking making to and fro motions with your forearms....you know... kinda like Popeye does.

I agree, sister. Actually, this Christmas season we're seeing a big upsurge in sales of our Christmas Terror! CDs, DVDs and comic books for children. We got some complaints from parents about the lyrics like, "Ho, ho, ho, you little ho come sit on Santa's lap," but our research department found that the kids really liked it. Below are some of our more popular titles, totally suitable for children in my opinion:

















Praise Jesus, and Merry Christmas!
Brother Fred