eternal itchy butts in hell?

[Petal]

i were readin my bibles, an these here verses spoked to me

And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched. <--- that be mark 9:43-44

what be them hell worms, are they gonna be like them worms that my kittys get an sometimes me to, an then i gets a schmelly finger . it say that hell worms be immortill, they never ever dies, so i guess lord God gonna gives sinner folk itchy butts for all eternitys?

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

My dear Petal,

Your simplistic understanding of Scripture is so refreshing, after all, doesn't Jesus Himself tell us in Mark 10:15 that we must be like children to enter the Kingdom of God?

While it is debatable that animals are granted eternal life, clearly in this Scripture, God says that the lowly worm will live forever. And they will feast on you forever. It doesn't say which kinds of worms, but since it is Hell, I imagine it's every kind of creepy crawly that can perform havoc on you.

I think what God is saying in this verse is you'll have every kind of worm. Worms in your stomach, worms in your brain, tapeworms, roundworms, botfly larvae hatching out of your flesh, maggots eating your scabs, and yes, even worms on your anus. But you won't be able to scratch because it is Hell after all. So yes, an itchy anus for eternity is basically what the Holy Bible is telling us.

I hope this has answered your question. God bless you, my dear child.

Yours in Christ,
Rev. Jim

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

Rev. Jim, that's an interesting take.

My seminary taught that "their worm" is a reference to the soul; their consciousness continues forever in well-deserved torture and agony.

[SUV]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

Oogy!

[Annie1]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

You won't have to worry about that anyway sister Petal because you won't go to hell, being an awesome True Christian ™ girl and all! All the vile sinners can have itchy bums forever hehehe

John 14:6 - Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

[WWJDnow]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

I don't think the worst anal problem people have to endure in Hell is itchiness.

[Eskimo[]]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

I don't get it.. is this whole place serious? I mean.. really? Is this like a gathering of fanatical hobos? I find this place hilarious cuz its just so insanely stupid.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

I don't get it.. is this whole place serious? I mean.. really? Is this like a gathering of fanatical hobos? I find this place hilarious cuz its just so insanely stupid.

What could possibly be more serious than getting raped by worms in Hell?

I will never understand unsaved trash.

[Coyote]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

I don't get it.. is this whole place serious? I mean.. really? Is this like a gathering of fanatical hobos? I find this place hilarious cuz its just so insanely stupid.

this is obviously no place for you.

[Minecraft]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

Wipe your ass if you want the itching to go away!

[Meek and Humble]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

Wipe your ass if you want the itching to go away!

Is that how you talk to innocent Christians with special needs?!

[Wide-Open]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

Is that how you talk to innocent Christians with special needs?!

Amen Brother. These people call themselves "tolerant", right? It makes me sick.

Remember when we tried to explain to Petal how to, um, wipe, um. It took 12 hours of cleaning up the place, that's what it did. And a paint job.

I truly hate the insensitivity of these trolls.

[jennabenna]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

Oh, piffle. You people have said much worse things about special-needs folks. Remember the special olympics posts?

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

Of course we remember them! We wrote them! But we wrote them about non-Christians.

[Halleluyah Rob]

Re: eternal itchy butts in hell?

The Lord certainly knows the true meaning of punishment.

I get annoyed after 5 seconds of my anus itching, I can't imagine an eternity.