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True Christian™
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Location: America: God's favorite nation
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Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-29-2014, 09:10 AM
Some people have said that anal sex between consenting adults is a "victim less crime". Nothing could be further from the truth. The victim is God. Let me explain.
Imagine you're on a perverted site like chat roulette. Where perverts go to have gay hookups and openly display their tallywacker for the world to see. Imagine you're a moderator or an administrator on that site. You have the the job of deciding who to allow on the site and who to ban. Someone sends you a report. You can't just ignore it, you have to open it up, read it, and have your eyes assaulted by tallywackers in order to make a decision. People who go on sites like chat roulette and post wangs are FORCING the site's administrators to watch them.
I think we can all agree that God's immaculate conception of Mary proves that God is indeed is a straight God that would hate to watch any sort of perversion.
Because God sees and knows all Psalm 147:5, and he sees all Job 28:24 that means he knows about what people do in their bedrooms. Specifically, He knows when they're having filthy, repulsive anal sex. Now, imagine how God feels. He is the ultimate judge, so in order to be fair in responsible he has to take EVERYTHING into consideration. Meaning, he has to watch homosexuals insert their perverted tallywackers into each other.
Homosexuals know this and yet they still do it, they probably get off on the idea of Jesus watching them insert their tallywackers into each other's hineys, wearing the crevasse's of each other's hineys as masks, and spitting out Jesus's loving blood in favor of another man's tallywacker secretion.
They delight in forcing Jesus to endure their perversion day after day. Can you imagine what a place like Sodom and Gomorrah did to God? Day in and day out, penis's and perversion everywhere. Finally, he wipes Sodom and Gomorrah off the face of the earth allowing him to have peace once again. Can you imagine the relief God must have felt?
Now, homosexuals and their radical agenda want to bring that sort of perversion back onto God again! Can you imagine how much God has to contain Himself to protect His favorite nation? Can you imagine how horrible it must be for him to live day in and day out? He is also so loving that he doesn't even want to shatter our free will by selectively killing off just the gay people, and he even wants to kindly give them a chance to repent from their wicket ways despite how terrible they are to Him.
How much longer can God contain Himself? Can you imagine the relief He must get every time He sends another natural disaster? Can you imagine how much anxious he must be to wipe us all off the face of the Earth, and how much he is constraining Himself out of his pure and undying love for us?
It would be like a human with fire ants all over him, but he is just sitting there and not trying to get them off for fear of killing off the few good ants.
Every homosexual is not just putting themselves at a greater risk of hellfire, but they are endangering us as well just from being in proximity too them! We need to either kill them now or put them off into some secluded group so God can wipe them out with one stroke.
Jail might be okay, provided they are completely placed in solitary confinement, and/or they have their tallywackers removed/, but knowing how crafty they are they will probably find a way to continue to masturbate and perform other sexually perverted acts on themselves and anger God. This is why homosexuals need to be put to death!
Close minded people are just right people who don't want to spend time arguing.
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-29-2014, 09:27 AM
What is this chat roulette you speak of? It sounds horrible! Can you give me the address, please? I feel I should bring myself up to speed regarding this latest vector by which sin is disseminated.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-29-2014, 09:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
What is this chat roulette you speak of? It sounds horrible! Can you give me the address, please? I feel I should bring myself up to speed regarding this latest vector by which sin is disseminated.
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Or ask your local Methodist priestess..
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Distinguished Professor of Prayer Healing and Creation Zoology (Baraminology) Victim of atheist scientific persecution
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Posts: 10,324
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Location: On a mission in Godless Europistan
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-29-2014, 09:51 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prayer Warrior
How much longer can God contain Himself? Can you imagine the relief He must get every time He sends another natural disaster? Can you imagine how much anxious he must be to wipe us all off the face of the Earth, and how much he is constraining Himself out of his pure and undying love for us?
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Thank you for alerting us to this, although this is most disturbing.
I think we'll see God's wrath in the VERY NEAR future:
Mark 9:1 And he said unto them, Verily I say unto you, That there be some of them that stand here, which shall not taste of death, till they have seen the kingdom of God come with power.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.
PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
Check out our Research in Creation Science:
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
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Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-29-2014, 04:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prayer Warrior
Some people have said that anal sex between consenting adults is a "victim less crime". Nothing could be further from the truth. The victim is God.
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Exactly, Brother. The concept of "victimless crime" has no support in Scripture. Every sin is an offense against Almighty God, or He wouldn't have made it a sin. Every sin defies the whole purpose for which humanity was created, which is to please God by fearing Him and keeping His commandments:
[Ecclesiastes 12:13 KJV] 13 Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this [is] the whole [duty] of man.
[Revelation 4:11 KJV] 11 Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honour and power: for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created.
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,364
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-29-2014, 10:14 PM
Sodomy is far from a "victimless crime". Besides its main victim, God, how do those perverts think I feel when walking down the streets of Des Moines seeing a happy, smiling, "married" gay couple holding hands, knowing what they are about to do later the same day to eachothers in their bedroom? How do they think that I and all other Christians feel about that? I can tell you that personally as a True Christian™ it makes me feel physically ill when I think of what they are doing with eachothers anuses.
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Mayor of Freehold
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Posts: 12,081
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-29-2014, 11:52 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ex-Viking
Sodomy is far from a "victimless crime". Besides its main victim, God, how do those perverts think I feel when walking down the streets of Des Moines seeing a happy, smiling, "married" gay couple holding hands, knowing what they are about to do later the same day to eachothers in their bedroom?
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I think we should require all homers to have tattooed on their butts, Jesus is watching you do this.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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True Christian™
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Posts: 1,716
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Location: In the midst of His Will®
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-30-2014, 01:18 AM
I have a theory that not only does Jesus have to watch each cornholing individually as it occurs, but that His omnipresence also forces him to witness all acts of sodomy, at all points in space and time at once! It is no wonder that He weeps...
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
04-30-2014, 11:33 AM
Context: Lazarus was dead. Dead as a door-nail, although I'd have thought that a coffin-nail was the deadest piece of ironmongery in the trade, nevertheless God makes it quite plain what death really means. Would Jesus obsess over mere death knowing that come the resurrection He and His friend would be reunited? And although a sister might lament her brother's passing as is recorded here, another factor is included. The aroma of putrefaction. Jesus wept.
He knew what was about to happen. Down to the tomb, rolling away the stone, the fug would be beyond belief. Priests are an archetype here, delighting in death and the opportunity for a fillip to their coffers.
There is no such thing as a Christian priest as vatican corpse worship demonstrates. The anus is the symbol of death. Those of us who hung around Northern European or Canadian seaports prior to Salvation know this full well. Jesus knew this too. But Lazarus was revived! Unlike at so-called "adult" themed nightclubs where donning colour-coded lingerie invites anonymous hanky-panky on the basis of genderspecific- or nonspecific- or anyothervarietyof- debauchery involving anuses or.. really can you imagine the fug in such an establishment? This is the little death Lazarus experienced. The olfactory dimension is included in John's account for a reason, in unique conjunction with Jesus ’ tears, knowing that in these last days the disregard for putrefaction, excrement and death would re-emerge for perverts everywhere.
The sexualisation of fćces and putrefaction was all within His ken when He wept that day. Jesus does not accept the anus as a path to righteousness any more than He accepts the stench of the grave (unlike the vatican, click image for more information). It is explicitly mentioned for a reason and every anal fixation reminds Him of Lazarus ’ reeking in that tomb with no apology and condemns each and every participant whether homo- or ano-erotically fixated to
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True Christian™ Brainiac
True Christian™
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Posts: 538
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Location: Protesting the pride parade!
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-02-2014, 08:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
What is this chat roulette you speak of? It sounds horrible! Can you give me the address, please? I feel I should bring myself up to speed regarding this latest vector by which sin is disseminated.
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Ah, it's not that bad. Sometimes.
I tried it out last year and ended up speaking to the nicest young Christian couple. We got onto the subject of Africa and I told them that we were wasting our time there. I said we should just leave them to rape and kill each other (not necessarily in that order). Anyway, the girl kept using the n-word to describe the poor things. Me and her husband were in agreement that there was no cause for such racism so every time she said it, he'd briefly take her out of view of the web camera and give her a little smack. Well, the girl was a bit of a slow learner, bless her. After this happened several times, I just said "look, we're all friends here". That put them at ease. I think they had the impression that their relationship dynamic was wrong or deviant. That's the liberal media for you, I suppose.
Anyway, I spoke to them for several hours before the wife went to bed complaining about a headache or dizziness or something. Maybe the intellectual calibre of the conversation was just too much for her. He looked a little annoyed by the sudden departure and then he said he had to go take care of her. That was the end of that. Like I said, really lovely couple.
Give it a try!
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-02-2014, 09:16 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elijah Mee, PhD
Ah, it's not that bad. Sometimes.
I tried it out last year and ended up speaking to the nicest young Christian couple. We got onto the subject of Africa and I told them that we were wasting our time there. I said we should just leave them to rape and kill each other (not necessarily in that order). Anyway, the girl kept using the n-word to describe the poor things. Me and her husband were in agreement that there was no cause for such racism so every time she said it, he'd briefly take her out of view of the web camera and give her a little smack. Well, the girl was a bit of a slow learner, bless her. After this happened several times, I just said "look, we're all friends here". That put them at ease. I think they had the impression that their relationship dynamic was wrong or deviant. That's the liberal media for you, I suppose.
Anyway, I spoke to them for several hours before the wife went to bed complaining about a headache or dizziness or something. Maybe the intellectual calibre of the conversation was just too much for her. He looked a little annoyed by the sudden departure and then he said he had to go take care of her. That was the end of that. Like I said, really lovely couple.
Give it a try!
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It's not Russian is it?
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 6
Join Date: May 2014
Location: on my knees for some hairy stranger
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 12:29 AM
Hey there Prayer Warrior!!!!
It seems pretty obvious with what you say that you dream of tallywackers all night long and would love to have a couple at the moment . For someone to rant on and on about the "evils" of anal sex, it would appear that you would like to participate in tallywacking in all its glory until you crash and burn of a little 'ol heart attack!! It's ok to be gay. The more you preach how awful it is just shows an intelligent reader how badly you will enjoy tallywacking yourself!! But I'll bet you have already participated in the act yourself. And if your words are anything to go by....YOU LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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True Christian™ with a quiverful
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Posts: 2,243
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Location: In the kitchen
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 12:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LovemyBible
tl;dr
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Gay boy, how about you mince over to the Introduction section, create a thread, and tell us how you came to find God.
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,656
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 01:08 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LovemyBible
It seems pretty obvious with what you say that you dream of tallywackers all night long and would love to have a couple at the moment . For someone to rant on and on about the "evils" of anal sex, it would appear that you would like to participate in tallywacking in all its glory until you crash and burn of a little 'ol heart attack!! It's ok to be gay. The more you preach how awful it is just shows an intelligent reader how badly you will enjoy tallywacking yourself!! But I'll bet you have already participated in the act yourself. And if your words are anything to go by....YOU LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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And with your Bible love no doubt you'll be able to cite the Bible reference to support your claim..?
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Mayor of Freehold
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Posts: 12,081
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Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 03:28 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LovemyBible
Hey there Prayer Warrior!!!!
It seems pretty obvious with what you say that you dream of tallywackers all night long and would love to have a couple at the moment .
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Shame on you for not taking this issue, forcing Jesus to watch anal sex, seriously. All of us have a responsibility to serve Jesus and what he is seeing will not be good for any of us, but especially you.
It's time for you to step up and help all of us stop anal sex.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Descended from Rapes
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,548
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold Bible Campground and RV Park.
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 03:44 AM
I wish that Jesus would make me watch the anal sex, you know, so he wouldn't have to. I would gladly take this horrible burden from the Lord's mighty tanned and toned shoulders. Anyone who wouldn't is in my opinion, just as bad as Judas.
Leviticus 13:40 And the man whose hair is fallen off his head, he is bald; yet is he clean.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,908
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Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 03:50 AM
You know us Pastors have to watch plenty of anal sex too. We spend countless hours screening pornography movies full of anal sex so you won't have to. We keep America safe!
Of course, we'll never be able to match the amount of anal sex that Jesus watches, but we do our best.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 533
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Love Child of Pastor Osborne
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 04:29 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LovemyBeer
Hey there Prayer Warrior!!!!
It seems pretty obvious with what you say that you dream of tallywackers all night long and would love to have a couple at the moment . For someone to rant on and on about the "evils" of anal sex, it would appear that you would like to participate in tallywacking in all its glory until you crash and burn of a little 'ol heart attack!! It's ok to be gay. The more you preach how awful it is just shows an intelligent reader how badly you will enjoy tallywacking yourself!! But I'll bet you have already participated in the act yourself. And if your words are anything to go by....YOU LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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It is pretty obvious Prayer Warrior has once again hit the nail on the head. His inspired posts frequently draw the ire of fudge lovers.
"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16)
"But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." (Matthew 5:32)
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Descended from Rapes
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,548
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold Bible Campground and RV Park.
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 04:39 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
You know us Pastors have to watch plenty of anal sex too. We spend countless hours screening pornography movies full of anal sex so you won't have to. We keep America safe!
Of course, we'll never be able to match the amount of anal sex that Jesus watches, but we do our best.
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You make me want to go back to Landover University for a divinity degree. $6000 a credit is pretty steep but they offer financing and we all know that God rewards his pastors so making the payments shouldn't be too hard.
Together we could watch twice as much anal sex.
Leviticus 13:40 And the man whose hair is fallen off his head, he is bald; yet is he clean.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 823
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: America: God's favorite nation
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Re: Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have ANAL SEX!! -
05-03-2014, 06:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LovemyBeer
Hey there Prayer Warrior!!!!
It seems pretty obvious with what you say that you dream of tallywackers all night long and would love to have a couple at the moment . For someone to rant on and on about the "evils" of anal sex, it would appear that you would like to participate in tallywacking in all its glory until you crash and burn of a little 'ol heart attack!! It's ok to be gay. The more you preach how awful it is just shows an intelligent reader how badly you will enjoy tallywacking yourself!! But I'll bet you have already participated in the act yourself. And if your words are anything to go by....YOU LOVED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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You heard it here first, preaching something is awful means you enjoy it . Is this what atheists think passes for logic now a days? Apparently in the backwards atheistic liberal world, preaching about how AWFUL something is means you ENJOY it.
I guess by your standard everyone who says something is awful is actually advocating it. When a person is holding a gun to someone's head and the victim says"Don't shoot me! It'd be awful! I don't want to die" what he actually means is "Yes, please kill me". When a black male thug invades a good Christian family's home to rape our sons and they say "NO! Stay away from me!" they actually mean "Yes, I consent to having sex ". When someone is having their valuables stolen, and they're saying "Stop! Thief!" they actually mean "Keep going! Please take my valuables!
This is the kind of path we end up on when we resort to using atheistic logic, and this is the kind of logic that allows them to justify all sorts of atrocities. No matter what the other person says or does, killing, rape, pedophilia, murder, torture, and worst of all homosexuality is justified. Atheists think the other person "consents" to it and enjoys it even when they say they don't.
Intelligent, is just another code word you use for people such as yourself who lack any sort of moral or ethical basis from discerning right from wrong or up from down. Anything is permitted in an atheistic world. Instead of telling me what I believe, why don't you take the time out to take a long hard look at yourself to understand why you hate Jesus so much, and why you are running from our loving savoir who temporarily died for you. It is my hope that you can see the error of your ways before Jesus is justly sends you .
Close minded people are just right people who don't want to spend time arguing.
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