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  • Mary Etheldreda
    Gushing for Jesus
     
    • Sep 2011
    • 23775

    #1

    Catholic Irony Meter Explodes

    Drunken mick priest reports anyone who doesn’t see the need for more exorcists is "out of touch with reality." That just tickles my funny bone to no end! The irony of a drunken superstitious pagan calling people who don't believe his delusion "out of touch with reality" is too much! I wouldn't want his reality to be real, that's for sure!


    Like demons would care about anal beads.

    In reality, we know (because we are not deluded) that demons will flee when and only when commanded by True Christians™ (Mark 16:16-18; Luke 10:17; John 14:11-13). Crackers don't work. Holy water is just water (and fecal matter), and demons know this. Anal beads, gross as they are, won't repel demons. Only the by the Authority of the Creator of the Heavens and the Earth can one do so, and Catholics call on their Pagan Goddess Mary instead. To think that anyone who doesn't believe their delusion is "out of touch with reality" is too funny!
    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

  • Johny Joe Hold
    Mayor of Freehold
     
    • Feb 2010
    • 12967

    #2
    Re: Catholic Irony Meter Explodes

    Priests in their white girly robes scaring demons? Not a chance.

    The only match for demons is a rough-and-tumble Baptist True Christian™. Send one of our preachers and watch demons run for cover.
    Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

    Comment

    • Ezekiel Bathfire
      Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
      Christ's Rottweiler
       
      • Jan 2008
      • 22912

      #3
      Re: Catholic Irony Meter Explodes

      I am impressed by the link you provided which informs me
      A 2016 documentary, Deliver Us, about modern-day exorcists, reveals how much the profession has changed over the years. For example, it shows a priest performing an exorcism via mobile phone.
      An advance approved by the Catholic Church for those occasions when the priest does not have time to leave the choirboy. I assume the so-called priest will have a special data plan with plenty of good, up-to-date anti-demon software. Catholics eh? What y' gonna do with 'em? Who's fooled by this garbage? You need the full Bell, Book and Candle and salt and all the stuff in the trunk of you SUV. Perhaps they use Whatsapp and send pictures.
      sigpic


      “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

      Author of such illuminating essays as,
      Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

      Comment

      • handmaiden
        Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
        True Christian™
        • May 2010
        • 11596

        #4
        Re: Catholic Irony Meter Explodes

        Sister Mary, when Catholic priests talk about being "out of touch", I shudder to consider what they think of as being, "in touch".
        His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

        Guns For God and the Economy

        Comment

        • LW1997
          Unsaved trash
          Sexually obsessed with blacks

          Excels in being witless
          • Oct 2017
          • 144

          #5
          Re: Catholic Irony Meter Explodes

          Moreover brethren, here a great video of flat earth believing brother Jason Jack from Birmingham, Alabama exposing the Catholic heresy:



          And brother Ralph Yankee Arnold from Tampa, Florida exposing the Pope:



          Also exposed by brother Luke Boozer AKA sincitypreacher from Las Vegas, Nevada along with Matthew G. Correll AKA jacksmack77:



          Neither is Australian brother Roger Bright AKA savedbyjesusblood scared to expose the Pope:



          Recently I had to deal with two Catholic dudes on my YouTube account who said the Catholic Church was Christ's church... Much stupidy in those last days...
          Well, we know, God does not throw anyone into hell. People just make the wrong choices. Sad, but true.

          Comment

          • WilliamJenningsBryan
            True Christian™
             
            • Jan 2007
            • 9384

            #6
            Re: Catholic Irony Meter Explodes

            Originally posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
            I am impressed by the link you provided which informs me An advance approved by the Catholic Church for those occasions when the priest does not have time to leave the choirboy. I assume the so-called priest will have a special data plan with plenty of good, up-to-date anti-demon software. Catholics eh? What y' gonna do with 'em? Who's fooled by this garbage? You need the full Bell, Book and Candle and salt and all the stuff in the trunk of you SUV. Perhaps they use Whatsapp and send pictures.

            Don’t forget the "new" pope's Twitter account - I suppose it's a "Holy" Twitter account?
            Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
            brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
            ...and get off my lawn
            sigpic

            Comment

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