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Despite having access to a Bible (surely the Catholic Church has one bible?) in which it is clearly written: 1Tm:6:20: O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called:
What sort of research? Well, it's going to be hard-hitting and bringing the faithful nearer to God, isn't it? So sit down and listen up!
Is it going to be something like testing to see if a relic is genuine? How inflation has made indulgences more expensive? That a Chinese plaster statue of Mary is really seeping blood or that the burned part of a piece of toast that looks like Joseph of Aramathea is really worth the price the guy is asking?
It's better than that. What is the title of the learned paper rigorously researched by Scientists at the Pontifical Catholic University of Chile?
"Physical Properties and Microstructural Changes during Soaking of Individual Corn and Quinoa Breakfast Flakes"
Yes, scientists at the Pontifical Catholic University of Chile did the unthinkable—they added water to corn flakes. They found that the “intermolecular interactions in the flake’s matrix could be weakened by the plasticizer, leading to the solubilization of some components, and ... a decrease in mechanical integrity.” Translated into English? Water makes cereal soggy. Milk, it turns out, is special. The fat content protects cereal from sucking in too much liquid, keeping it crispy.
Well Whoopy-Doo! There's another weapon in the arsenal of the Jesuits!
There must be a problem with stupid Catholics putting water on cornflakes. Is "Holy Water" any better - what about those Death Cookies they eat? Are they better with milk? Did Jesus prohibit water on Cornflakes? Are they referencing "The Miracle of the Soggy Cornflakes"? Does water on Cornflakes displease God, does it help the journey to Heaven?
The abstract is here:
To encourage you to read this garbage, here's an extract:
The Pope spends Catholics' Money on Scientific Research - that's what!
What sort of research? Well, it's going to be hard-hitting and bringing the faithful nearer to God, isn't it? So sit down and listen up!
Is it going to be something like testing to see if a relic is genuine? How inflation has made indulgences more expensive? That a Chinese plaster statue of Mary is really seeping blood or that the burned part of a piece of toast that looks like Joseph of Aramathea is really worth the price the guy is asking?
It's better than that. What is the title of the learned paper rigorously researched by Scientists at the Pontifical Catholic University of Chile?
"Physical Properties and Microstructural Changes during Soaking of Individual Corn and Quinoa Breakfast Flakes"
Yes, scientists at the Pontifical Catholic University of Chile did the unthinkable—they added water to corn flakes. They found that the “intermolecular interactions in the flake’s matrix could be weakened by the plasticizer, leading to the solubilization of some components, and ... a decrease in mechanical integrity.” Translated into English? Water makes cereal soggy. Milk, it turns out, is special. The fat content protects cereal from sucking in too much liquid, keeping it crispy.
Well Whoopy-Doo! There's another weapon in the arsenal of the Jesuits!
There must be a problem with stupid Catholics putting water on cornflakes. Is "Holy Water" any better - what about those Death Cookies they eat? Are they better with milk? Did Jesus prohibit water on Cornflakes? Are they referencing "The Miracle of the Soggy Cornflakes"? Does water on Cornflakes displease God, does it help the journey to Heaven?
The abstract is here:
To encourage you to read this garbage, here's an extract:
"Structural and textural modifications were primarily ascribable to the plasticizing effect of water that softened the carbohydrate/protein matrix, inducing partial collapse of the porous structure and eventually disintegration of the whole piece through deep cracks."
If you want to learn anything about Biblical Science - and who doesn't? - Wednesday next, at 7:30pm, there will be lectures on The Virgin Birth, evidence of the loaves and fishes, and how a quantum combination of Earth, Air, Fire and Water conspired to produce a floating ax-head.
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