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  • Ezekiel Bathfire
    Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
    Christ's Rottweiler
     
    • Jan 2008
    • 22834

    #1

    The Biblical Goat

    The Biblical Goat

    The word “Goat” appears 122 times in the OT and 7 times in the NT. I suspect that the reason is that God put a lot of emphasis on goats in the OT and sent Jesus to earth once the idea had been firmly fixed in the minds of the Chosen People and part of Jesus’s Mission was to introduce more firmly the idea of “Sheep”and the distinction between these two godly animals.


    Obviously, there is a great skill to goat-herding: there’s that bit about Jacob breeding genetically modified goats and making then stripy by putting them near striped sticks (Gen:30:37, etc.), and then there’s making goat curtains (Ex:26:7), not to mention the goat of the sin offering which is very technical and hard to find (Le:10:16)

    Yet despite all these things, the Patriarchs knew these things and herded goats and thus saw the Wisdom of the Lord develop in their minds in a way that is so far advanced that, even today, the Bible is filled with prophecies and the true explanations of life.

    Over the years, while we are waiting for Jesus’s return (any day now) some of mankind has forgotten this Wisdom gleaned in the solitude of live spent on lonely hillsides in Judea when the mind can wander freely and be open to the purity God’s Word. Yes, sinners have tried to mimic this process by “science so-called” (1Tm:6:20) and failed not only themselves, but us all.

    It is the simple goat that indirectly gives the world meaning.

    You may wonder why I tell you this. The fact of the matter is that my Nephew Zebulun volunteered to go to the Holy Land to seek out Biblical Treasures to bring back to Landover for the spiritual strengthening of the congregation and the study of us Biblical Scientists. He left a month ago with only access to my bank account, an unlimited expense account, and his secretary, the charming and hard working Miss Rita Chevrolet.

    I have just heard from him and he has located “The Biblical Goat”. The animal is alive and well (despite the fact that it must be thousands of years old) and he is currently in negotiations with the owner/manager of Utopia Park, Ra’annana, Israel, who has personally certified the goat as “Biblical”.

    By way of proof, Zebulun has forwarded me the attached photo of the “House of the Biblical Goat” clearly showing its sign.


    Click image for larger version

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    The owner/manager of Utopia Park will not part with this specimen for less than 1 million Shekels – personally, I think this is a bargain! Imagine having “The Biblical Goat” right here in Landover – it would be an attraction greater than the Creation Museum or that Ark that’s been built!

    Please give generously!
    sigpic


    “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

    Author of such illuminating essays as,
    Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
  • Johny Joe Hold
    Mayor of Freehold
     
    • Feb 2010
    • 12336

    #2
    Re: The Biblical Goat

    I'm 100% in on this project, Pastor. Whenever I read the Bible and there is a story about goats I always find special meaning. It seems to me God knew that using goats in His message would provide timeless wisdom. If we could bring the very goat God Himself held dear we could spread God's message near and far.

    After we raise the money and buy the goat the issue of how to haul it to Freehold will come up. Pastor Zeke will not want his plane subjected to goat odors so we will have to look elsewhere.
    Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

    Comment

    • Ezekiel Bathfire
      Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
      Christ's Rottweiler
       
      • Jan 2008
      • 22834

      #3
      Re: The Biblical Goat

      Originally posted by Johny Joe Hold View Post
      I'm 100% in on this project, Pastor. Whenever I read the Bible and there is a story about goats I always find special meaning. It seems to me God knew that using goats in His message would provide timeless wisdom. If we could bring the very goat God Himself held dear we could spread God's message near and far.

      After we raise the money and buy the goat the issue of how to haul it to Freehold will come up. Pastor Zeke will not want his plane subjected to goat odors so we will have to look elsewhere.
      I don't really see that we need have any plans - we will just fall in with God's Plan! "Ask and it shall be given" is may motto - God will sort out the details.

      By the way, I noticed that if we change what you said: "If we could bring the very goat God Himself held dear we could spread God's message near and far. "
      to
      "If we could bring the very goat God Himself held dear
      We could spread God's message far and near. "

      We have the beginnings of a hymn of ambitious praise! I will try and write 12 or 15 more verses! This is a sign from God that He wants us to have that goat!
      sigpic


      “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

      Author of such illuminating essays as,
      Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

      Comment

      • WilliamJenningsBryan
        True Christian™
         
        • Jan 2007
        • 9384

        #4
        Re: The Biblical Goat

        I'm delighted to hear that there exists an historic and authentic "Biblical" goat around - and perhaps we could further utilize a heard of them to graze the church grass in lieu of mowing (Brother White may have something to say about this). I'm also wondering if the German translation of the Book of Revelations is called Göatterdämmerung.
        Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
        brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
        ...and get off my lawn
        sigpic

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