[Roland]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

So anyone listening in, who has extra-Biblical evidence that gingers have souls but has been wary of introducing it here for fear of the mockery, disdain, and turd flinging that would ensue, fear not, for Pastor Ezekiel himself has given special dispensation for discussion of this topic to include ANY source, including (gasp) science!

Bring it on!

Before I forget: Many thanks to Pastor Ezekiel for giving special dispensation to include any source.

Kind regards,

Roland

[Roland]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

Hi, rapeusnow. I think you've misunderstood the situation slightly. As I am not a True Christian™, it doesn't really matter to me where the evidence comes from. The KJV Bible would be best in these circumstances, of course, but failing that, any writings, sacred or not, from any faith tradition, even secular sources, would be considered.

So anyone listening in, who has extra-Biblical evidence that gingers have souls but has been wary of introducing it here for fear of the mockery, disdain, and turd flinging that would ensue, fear not, for Pastor Ezekiel himself has given special dispensation for discussion of this topic to include ANY source, including (gasp) science!

Bring it on!

Dear Didymus Much,


I would like to take you up on your offer.


As source I will use The Loose Canon – A holy book of the church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster


From The Book of Fearsome Pirate Pete:
5:2 “When you die, your soul, which I think is immortal, but don’t quote me on that, will find it’s way to Pastafarian Heaven, where there is a Volcano of Beer, and a Factory of Strippers.”


This establishes that it is the soul which will go to Pastafarian Heaven. We also know in Pastafarian Heaven there is a stipper factory and a beer volcano.


From The Book of Penelope:
20″Yes our Lord FSM created it for all those who would not be big jerks and go around telling people what to believe”.
21″Well that seems decent of FSM but tell me why are there only cute guys and the occasional redheaded woman?
22I’m trendy but not everyone else is”.
23″It is because you are here.
24As with the beer volcano, so it is with the stripper factory.
25YOU and your desires dictate the out-put….


Clearly Penelope has died and gone to Pastafarian Heaven. In Pastafarian Heaven there are redheaded women which means they had to have souls for it is the soul that goes to Pastarian Heaven.


As we can see it was because of the lust of Penelope that at least some gingers (probably the good looking girls) have souls.


I´m sorry to hear the Pink Prius is no longer available but an Invisible Pink Prius will be just fine and it will save shipping costs, which is nice. For the website: I doubt you could bring it down so I reckon that is an empty promise, no harm done though.


Kind regards,

Roland

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

Prove that any of you have a soul

If you want to debate people, THIS is the place to go.

Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

Okay then by that redheads have sould

The Holy Bible does not mention redheads. It doesn't mention anal fissures either. I think it must be because some things are truly horrible to talk about.

[dogofwar]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

I have never seen a gathering of mormons in my life to rival you people.

[dogofwar]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

Okay then by that redheads have sould

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

Prove that any of you have a soul

It's in the Bible(KJV1611), doofus.

Matthew 10:28 - And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.

God bless.

[dogofwar]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

Prove that any of you have a soul

[Attila's Wife]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

Yesterday in Edinbugger, Godless Scotland:




Anyone spot a soul among this lot?

The green-t-shirted fool leading this march is quoted as saying:

In Canada there's not a lot of redheads, and for me as a really ridiculously gay kid, having red hair only heightened my sense of isolation because nobody looked like me, nobody lisped like me or burnt under the sun like I did.

Well, I never thought I'd say this, but good for Canada!

[Didymus Much]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

...Also Didymus, I was wondering why you would want a porn star as the President of the US.

If the choice was between a porn star and a Mormon bishop (e.g. Romney), wouldn't you?

For one thing, nobody'd be able to blackmail him over ANYTHING.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

I know, right?

A few days ago my Jeep was overheating so I pulled off the road and a couple of minutes later two fags stopped to ask if I needed a hand (NO JOKES PLEASE).

My first thought: good grief, what kind of man drives a MIATA?



Anyway, I told them everything was OK it just needs to cool down, but they stayed there talking for a while. Really nice guys, and polite as all get out, but you know...sodomites.

Later I wondered if they were plotting to rape me. You know how they get.

YiC,

Zech

Oh my WORD, Mr. Smyth! How terrifying!

I am so glad the LORD kept you safe from harm!

Praise Jesus!

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

I'm sorry, I just don't understand how rape and child abuse are OK. Could this be explained?

Hi friend. You sound a bit confused. You see, if you read the Holy Bible in context, these things will all fall into place. That's why we consistently encourage people to read the Word of God.

In answer to your question, you have to remember that legitimate rape is never "okay" in that the rapist gets to go off and rape again. In the case of a legitimate rape, there are consequences that must be carried out for the good of all parties (Deuteronomy 22:28-29).

You're similarly confused about child abuse. The Holy Bible does not condone abuse; it encourages discipline. You can read more about that HERE.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

I know, right?

A few days ago my Jeep was overheating so I pulled off the road and a couple of minutes later two fags stopped to ask if I needed a hand (NO JOKES PLEASE).

My first thought: good grief, what kind of man drives a MIATA?



Anyway, I told them everything was OK it just needs to cool down, but they stayed there talking for a while. Really nice guys, and polite as all get out, but you know...sodomites.

Later I wondered if they were plotting to rape me. You know how they get.

YiC,

Zech

Damn me, but that was a close shave, Brother.

The reason queers hang around in pairs is because no one queer has strong enough wrists to pin a normal man down: they need two of them to do it.



The fact they didn't try to have their way with your face and mouth is proof (if proof be need be) that Jesus has your back!

Glory!

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

A fundamental part of Christianity is following the law of Jesus.

Some bits are harder than others. I'm not very keen on the idea of rape being a crime against property instead of person and some queers are genuinely friendly but as a Christian it is my duty to follow the Bible if I want Jesus to be my Saviour.

That means advocating the death of queers and rapees marrying their rapists as Jesus demands; I don't ask why. Who am I to question my creator?

God bless

I know, right?

A few days ago my Jeep was overheating so I pulled off the road and a couple of minutes later two fags stopped to ask if I needed a hand (NO JOKES PLEASE).

My first thought: good grief, what kind of man drives a MIATA?



Anyway, I told them everything was OK it just needs to cool down, but they stayed there talking for a while. Really nice guys, and polite as all get out, but you know...sodomites.

Later I wondered if they were plotting to rape me. You know how they get.

YiC,

Zech

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Prove that gingers have souls!

I'm sorry, I just don't understand how rape and child abuse are OK. Could this be explained?

A fundamental part of Christianity is following the law of Jesus.

Some bits are harder than others. I'm not very keen on the idea of rape being a crime against property instead of person and some queers are genuinely friendly but as a Christian it is my duty to follow the Bible if I want Jesus to be my Saviour.

That means advocating the death of queers and rapees marrying their rapists as Jesus demands; I don't ask why. Who am I to question my creator?

God bless