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Any tips on how to keep the baby from being a spoiled, horrid wiccer nergroid lover like it's father?
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Repent, or be tortured in nasty ways with sharp, pointy things! -
Re: Am giving birth soon!
Simple. Don't be afraid to kick it's ass. You have to remember they are born into sin.Originally posted by Cheshire View Post
Proverbs 22:15
Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Proverbs 23:13
Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
Proverbs 29:15
The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame. -
Re: Am giving birth soon!
I've noticed, Cheshire, that your Church attendance hasn't been what it once was. You haven't fallen prey to those secular lies about pregnant women needing to practice their kegels, have you? I think we all know where that sinful activity leads.Originally posted by Cheshire View Postsigpic
I loved Newt before Newt was invincibleComment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
No, don't worry. I got a job, as the divorce settlement didn't leave me with enough to finish fixing the house.Repent, or be tortured in nasty ways with sharp, pointy things!Comment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
"Any tips on how to keep the baby from being a spoiled, horrid wiccer nergroid lover like it's father?"
Were you raped child? or did you willingly spread your sluttty legs for that filth?
Either way I think your child is already well on the path to destruction.I am on the adventure of a lifetime! This is even better than the time I used the plastic stones!Comment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
Originally posted by Star Finder View Post
I don't think I'm going to take advice(or critisism)(sp?) from a rock worshipper. I was not raped, William hid his horridness very well. I am just a stupid woman, and obviously God wanted to teach me a lesson for not doing thorough background checks.Repent, or be tortured in nasty ways with sharp, pointy things!Comment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
As a new mother, I'm sure you will find this thread helpful.
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View PostAs a new mother, I'm sure you will find this thread helpful.
Thank yu very much! I'll be sure to buy one of Ezekiel's baby cribs-Higher voltage, of course.Repent, or be tortured in nasty ways with sharp, pointy things!Comment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
Brothers, like many of you I was fooled by the lovely avatar that Cheshire promotes, and by her location. I NEVER would have suspected this lovely Christian lady of being a WIKKER NIGRA! Your statement has me thinking otherwise.Originally posted by Cheshire View PostComment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
I hope you have a basement or cellar to put it in. I would suggest someplace as far from your own bedroom as possible, so that your sleep isn't disturbed by the baby's selfish bawling. Now some folks have told me about a commercial where they say "never never never shake a baby" and that's fine, but you do need to hold a newborn responsible for its actions or you'll end up with a child like Chelsea Clinton. Remember GOD's advice...Originally posted by Cheshire View Post
From the Good Book of Proverbs: "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.Comment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
Well, being from commmunist Canadia is your first problem.Originally posted by Cheshire View Post
"Free" health care after paying 90% income tax will spoil your little rebellious puke of a child. Get it off the government welfare otherwise it is one doomed mistake.
Why didn't you stick with typical wiccan drunken anal sex?Judges 15:16
And Samson said, With the jawbone of an ass, heaps upon heaps, with the jaw of an ass have I slain a thousand men.Comment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
Did I not already say that my (ex) husband had me fooled into thinking he was Christian? I'm not the most percepptive person on earth, you know...Repent, or be tortured in nasty ways with sharp, pointy things!Comment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
Best of luck with bringing this child into the world to grow up into a wonderful Baptist. I trust that you have learned from your mistakes and are now a better person.
I hope your birth is safe and without complications, Jesus will be with you.
SusieComment
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Re: Am giving birth soon!
Swaddling clothes. They’re the answer. If they were good enough for Jesus, they’re good enough for your baby.
Make sure they’re tight though. Best to over-tighten them and then if the baby’s face starts to go purple, release the pressure little by little until it is a healthy red (use a beetroot for comparison).
Make sure there are often oxen and asses about the child too. A shepherd or two and a wise man might help.
And if anyone comes taking a census, leave immediately.Last edited by Ezekiel Bathfire; 08-02-2008, 01:38 PM.sigpic
Author of such illuminating essays as,
“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.Comment
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