Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

I was reading an article on Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, otherwise known as Crib Death and I was reminded of

Lu:18:15: And they brought unto him also infants, that he would touch them: but when his disciples saw it, they rebuked them.
Lu:18:16: But Jesus called them unto him, and said, Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.
Lu:18:17: Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child shall in no wise enter therein.

Now before some papist says this is something in favour of infant baptism, let me inform you that the word, “as” means “in the manner of”, e.g. “They are idolaters as Catlix.”

Why would Jesus smite infants? Well, the infant, hardly able to think, is not going to be evil as such (unless it’s called Damien), so it must be the parents.

Killing off children is the province of a wrathful God,

1Sa:15:3: Now go and smite Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not; but slay both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass.

And it is the parents who are the enemies of God.

So when your wife wakes in the morning, and little Johnny doesn’t, although, as a husband you can expect a tedious and prolonged wailing and gnashing of teeth, sack-cloth and ashes, slobbering and tears and general embarrassingly large outpourings of uncontrolled feminine emotion, your only words to your wife will be, “You are a vile sinner and enemy of God, this is your Godly punishment for committing abominable acts.”

As a husband, your job will then to be to have your wife immediately undertake to seek sincere repentance and there and then (within the hour I suggest) to start fathering little soldiers for Christ.

Johnny the corpse can wait – he is having his skin peeled in Hell as he never accepted Jesus – and has an eternity to think about things.

This may seem harsh but Jesus makes it plain that if we are to faithfully follow him, we must leave behind those who are not willing to faithfully follow him. said, “M't:8:22: But Jesus said unto him, Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.”

So that’s it in a nutshell, if your baby dies, you should get on with procreation and life forthwith and stop your repentant wife whining.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

I
So that’s it in a nutshell, if your baby dies, you should get on with procreation and life forthwith and stop your repentant wife whining.

As if any woman is going to want sex at a time like that.

[Deaner]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

I always wondered if Sudden Infant Death Syndrome was God's response to secular law not allowing us to smash their heads on rocks. I think Jesus just sends a demon to suck all the air out of the little bastards.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

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I've heard that it's caused by the gateway sin of breastfeeding.

[Nobar King]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

It's surely a punishment for bad mothers.

[SUV]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

Lumpy, this is really not the time nor the place to be making "Dead Baby" jokes

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

As if any woman is going to want sex at a time like that.

Lumpy, we must live in the real world: as a frail and weak-minded woman, you are to accept the guidance of your husband.

Ec: 9:5-6For the living know that they shall die: but the dead know not any thing, neither have they any more a reward; for the memory of them is forgotten. Also their love, and their hatred, and their envy, is now perished; neither have they any more a portion for ever in any [thing] that is done under the sun.

This vale of tears continues with each day evidencing the sins of the Unsaved Trash, what can we do but give our praises to God and continue with being fruitful?

[Marshall]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

If the baby dies early then it was obviously not a real baby, possibly a devil child, and was supposed to die(smote by the Lord). The wife should praise Jesus for His mercy and her not having to raise the soulless child and then she needs to get back on the horse and start making replacement babies as fast as possible.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

Lumpy, this is really not the time nor the place to be making "Dead Baby" jokes

I was not making a joke of any kind, nor do I find dead babies funny.
I simply said that no woman would be in the mood for sex after just having found her baby dead in its crib.
For a man to even suggest sex at a time like that is heartless.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

As if any woman is going to want sex at a time like that.

In what way is that relevant?

Anyway, while this thread is excellent at dealing with the aftereffects of cot death, it is also worth putting some effort into preventing it from occurring in the first place. This old thread has an excellent discussion of how you can stop God from wanting to kill your baby.

Cot death is also called SIDS -- an acronym which stands for sudden infant death syndrome. Cot death isn't any one illness or disease. Rather, it's a diagnosis, given when an apparently healthy baby under the age of one dies without warning. When doctors and investigators can't pinpoint a cause after performing a full investigation including an autopsy, review of family and medical history and examination of the death scene, the cause is clearly an act of God. It is hard for us mere mortals to say why God chooses to smite babies in this fashion, yet it is clear that they must have displeased Him somehow. Today, I'm going to show you how to minimise the risk of cot death by eradicating liberal and atheistic tendencies in one's infant.

Put your baby to sleep on his or her face
It is a well-known fact that demons can enter a child during sleep, and demon-possessed children being slain by God is a major cause of cot death. Putting a child to sleep with its face and stomach down is a surefire way of reducing the risk of demonic entry via the mouth or nose.

Don't allow liberals to prevent you smoking near your baby
During the 2004 elections, the tobacco industry donated over $2,000,000 to the Republican party. This is a good and Godly industry, unjustly persecuted by various forms of totalitarian and liberal secularists. Exposing your child to smoke from an early age will help to immunise it against secularist/liberal propaganda.

Use soft sleeping surfaces for bedding
Waterbeds, beanbags, baby nests and other soft surfaces are excellent for this purpose. The use of a firm, flat mattress may lead to gender confusion, and should be avoided.

Avoid underheating your baby
An insufficiently warm room, too little bedding, or bedding that cannot cover a baby's head sufficiently are associated with an increased risk of cot death. If you fear your baby may be falling under Satanic influence, it is important that you give your baby a chance to sweat it out: sweating, damp hair, heat rash, rapid breathing and restlessness all indicate that a child is being kept at the correct temperature.
It is important that you give your child room to move around; placing its feet at the foot of the cot or pram and tucking covers in securely so that they cannot slip over the child's head are both examples of the sort of behaviour that may lead to your child becoming a work-adverse hippy, and thus a prime candidate for God's wrath.

[Brother_Percy]

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Surely SID 'Syndrome' or 'Crip' Death is a fatal form of spastic retardation? You know, it's a well know fact that most of these retards die in childbirth BECAUSE GOD WANTS THEM TO! Glory!

[papparat]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

In what way is that relevant?

Anyway, while this thread is excellent at dealing with the aftereffects of cot death, it is also worth putting some effort into preventing it from occurring in the first place. This old thread has an excellent discussion of how you can stop God from wanting to kill your baby.

I did not think ANYONE could stop ALMIGHTY GOD from doing WHATEVER HE WANTS

Who is the all powerful ? You or God ?

Temperance, Brother, I know of your standing in Church & I am grateful in your teachings & guidance, as I am to all.

I know I am a mere sinner who is on his first steps on the path to righteousness, but forgive me Brother, I take against you on this

You Can Not Stop God.....I trust that this was just mis-worded.

Sadly , & at the great risk of Infraction, this is the second time I have had to call to question what you have said. You have been in the fray, Brother perhaps it is time for a little RnR to refresh your mighty Brain & Wisdom.Come back Refreshed & Renewed to you weighty duties

I say this with the utmost respect & humility Brother. Please take in in the Godly Brotherly Spirit it was intended

[papparat]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

Pss.19

1. [12] Who can understand his errors? cleanse thou me from secret faults.

[Get Thee Hence!]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

Can anyone confirm whether or not the caul of this Hellbound baby was put to good Christian use?

I would think it be only fair in God's loving eyes that it were used to help warm any one of Christ's Newborn Soldiers.

[Buford T Scoggins]

Re: Sudden Infant Death Syndrome or Crib Death

I was not making a joke of any kind, nor do I find dead babies funny.
I simply said that no woman would be in the mood for sex after just having found her baby dead in its crib.

Since when do women have to be in the mood? Servicing her husband is the duty of a good Christian wife, along with breeding soldiers, cooking, cleaning and voting the way her husband tells her to.

Of course, I'm not heartless. A husband should always consider his wife's feelings. That's why back when I was married to Daisy Mae (age 13), I used to keep some roofies handy, which I mixed with Thunderbird and poured down her throat with a funnel. Most of the time, she didn't even know she had sex. I even let her wear clothes on cold days - probably a mistake since it made it easier for her to escape. Guess you could say I spoiled her, but that's the way it is when you're in love.

YIC,
Buford