What Will Jesus Wear?

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Brethren & Sistren

The coming of the Lord draweth nigh (James 5:8), which made me wonder what it's going to look like - and what He will wear.

The Bible tells us (Acts 1:11) that He "shall so come in like manner as ye have seen him go into heaven", which means that He will appear in white flowing robes - perfect for hiding two swords (Luke 22:36-38) - or maybe He'll upgrade to a Glock?

The Bible also tells us Jesus will appear "clothed with a vesture dipped in blood" (Revelation 19:13). One would think the blood and gore would become a bit sticky after a few days and that He would like to change. But then the Bible also tells us that the Lord changeth not.

Maybe our annointed leader, Bush, will lend Him one of his $14.000 Oxxford suits? Will The King of Kings dress like a president? Or like a Soldier? Or General? Let me hear what you think.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I voted "White Flowy Robe".

Why, here he is fresh out of the tomb and his Robe is still crisp and white!

GLORY!!!!!!!!!

[Poetic Peter]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

This is so tough a choice.
I wish there were an option for "wearing the skin of the saved".

Begging to not to be rebuked for disagreeing with the Bible,
(for I do not; I like mysterious ways),

I see Jesus returning in the nude--His skin all a patch of nail-sized
bits of white, yellow, brown, blackend epidermis;
a Jesus of Grafts, as it were, of every mortal he ever skived saved.

In this wishful apparition I see
the Equinanimous I so wish to meet,
to contribute hide my bits to from.

Just in case, though, I vote "white robes", improbable as they seem.

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I voted "White Flowy Robe".

Why, here he is fresh out of the tomb and his Robe is still crisp and white!

GLORY!!!!!!!!!

I hate to tell you this, Sister, but that picture is a fake. The Bible tells us that Jesus left his linen clothes in the grave:

Luke 24:12 Then arose Peter, and ran unto the sepulchre; and stooping down, he beheld the linen clothes laid by themselves, and departed, wondering in himself at that which was come to pass.

John 20:6 Then cometh Simon Peter following him, and went into the sepulchre, and seeth the linen clothes lie,
John 20:7 And the napkin, that was about his head, not lying with the linen clothes, but wrapped together in a place by itself.

Mortal man is not fully equipped to understand the way of Christ and the will of God. But the Bible doesn't lie, and when Our Lord rose from the sepulchre He was butt naked.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I hate to tell you this, Sister, but that picture is a fake. The Bible tells us that Jesus left his linen clothes in the grave:

Luke 24:12 Then arose Peter, and ran unto the sepulchre; and stooping down, he beheld the linen clothes laid by themselves, and departed, wondering in himself at that which was come to pass.

John 20:6 Then cometh Simon Peter following him, and went into the sepulchre, and seeth the linen clothes lie,
John 20:7 And the napkin, that was about his head, not lying with the linen clothes, but wrapped together in a place by itself.

Mortal man is not fully equipped to understand the way of Christ and the will of God. But the Bible doesn't lie, and when Our Lord rose from the sepulchre He was butt naked.

Oh MY Brother Danish!

Thank you for pointing that out. I had no idea!

As you know I was home schooled (as all True Christians™ should be) and I'm sure my GODLY Momma did not want my innocent, young mind tarnished by the thought of a naked JESUS.

With Love and appreciation, Sister Thumper

[Poetic Peter]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

...the Bible doesn't lie, and when Our Lord rose from the sepulchre He was butt naked.

.................................................. .................................................. .....

My dream of Jesus, all in grafts, has haunted this Peter for years.
So--the dream is nearly real; I am
blessed with Partial Sight of Him.
I have been touched.


The question is, but then,
which color of skin will
His Will be mostly in?





WHITE!!!!

[SUV]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

My GOD, Brother Danish, what Torture to choose only one! (I finally, finally, after almost wearing a bald spot into my head, chose "Vesture dipped in blood.")

Beginning this very moment, I am going to begin Praying we get six separate Comings of the Christ so I can see Him in all of them!!!

OH, how I was the Landover Fashion Police were still here to advise on these matters!

[SalvationSeeker]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I believe he will have white flowing robes.. which are dipped in blood.
Praise Jesus!

Maybe you could add such an option?

[lilith]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I hate to tell you this, Sister, but that picture is a fake. The Bible tells us that Jesus left his linen clothes in the grave:

Luke 24:12 Then arose Peter, and ran unto the sepulchre; and stooping down, he beheld the linen clothes laid by themselves, and departed, wondering in himself at that which was come to pass.

John 20:6 Then cometh Simon Peter following him, and went into the sepulchre, and seeth the linen clothes lie,
John 20:7 And the napkin, that was about his head, not lying with the linen clothes, but wrapped together in a place by itself.

Mortal man is not fully equipped to understand the way of Christ and the will of God. But the Bible doesn't lie, and when Our Lord rose from the sepulchre He was butt naked.

Oh wonderful! Not only do we have to contend with bible bangers everywhere,now their sna...um...saviour's apparently going to turn up in his birthday suit!

Something else to look forward to.

[SUV]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

Oh my GOD, Lilith, what if He turns up in that great big beautiful Golden shell like Mother Glynndie posted?!

However, His Baby Blues waving around at the end of eye-stalks is something I'd rather not consider Right now.....

(Don't tell those Holy Joes I even said this, okay? They're starting to give me funny looks as it is)

[Mrs. Rogers]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I voted for His wearing blood-drenched robes too - which, I imagine, He will slowly remove, standing before us naked ... clothed only in His Holy Wounds, oozing His eternal love for True Christians™. Perhaps then He will cast the bloody robes into Hell, where Lilith and Hellsinker await; having never bothered with anything as domestic as a washing machine during their earthly reign of terror, they will spend eternity trying to scrub Our Saviour's precious blood out of the cloth ... crying and wailing and gnashing their teeth, and gashing their knuckles on Hell's washboard ... which is, one assumes, made entirely of barbed wire; a marvel of Satan's evil technology.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I have to go with the ten-gallon hat. Jesus loves America best of all. I'm sure he'll want to relect that preference by appearing before us as a cowboy ready to shoot some filthy savages like John Wayne.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I went with the blood. If the jesus of the bible had existed, it's what he would have preferred.

But I notice there was one option missing. What happened to 'a shell'? Don't snails wear shells? Didn't SUV and Lilith work out that he was snail? Since when do snails wear robes or cowboy boots?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

This is about to cause a doctrinal problem. If JESUS is alive, in the sense we understand it, He must be on earth being alive like we are alive. Otherwise He has not yet returned to a human form and so is not 'alive' in human terms. Sadly, those of little faith make this and other similar silly arguments and claim that JESUS isn't coming back because he is dead and that's the end of the story.

What they don't realize is that JESUS is going to return for the sole purpose of killing those faithless unbelievers.

[OnYourKnees]

Re: What Will Jesus Wear?

I went with the blood. If the jesus of the bible had existed, it's what he would have preferred.

Now, now. That's just the Jesus of Paul's part of the Bible, the overwrought massacrer of Unsaved (like you . . .).

The Jesus of the whole New Testament would have to wear white flowing robes covered only HALF in blood, to demonstrate His sweet, accepting, and loving nature, the fellow who spent his time with prostitutes, heathens, and other outcasts on the one hand, and His unquenchable lust for the blood of the Unsaved on the other. You know, like one of those half-and-half costumes:

But I notice there was one option missing. What happened to 'a shell'? Don't snails wear shells? Didn't SUV and Lilith work out that he was snail? Since when do snails wear robes or cowboy boots?

Silly Van Heathen. In God, all things are possible. Even snails wearing robes or cowboy boots . . . HEY! Baby Jesus is NOT a SNAIL!