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  • Faith_Machine
    Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • Mar 2011
    • 10050

    #1

    How to Ensure Bountiful Supply of Sons

    Now don't get me wrong, I love women. The only thing is female children aren't good for much. Sure, they have the potential to earn their keep in a factory or by taking in laundry, but they just don't possess the kind of fighting spirit that makes every male child a potential warrior for Christ.

    You'll probably agree with me, therefore, that it would be a fine thing if we could somehow ensure a more favorable ratio of sons to daughters.

    Well look no further, friends, because God has shown us the way, and it lies in the miracle of nuclear fission!

    Japanese Nuclear "Disaster" Could Cause Baby Boy Boom in America!



    *Study claims nuclear radiation from bomb testing and power plant leaks hits female birthrate

    *Japanese nuclear disaster could hit girl births in U.S.


    Nuclear radiation from power plant leaks and bomb tests resulted in millions fewer baby girls born worldwide, according to a new study.

    Scientists noted these types of atmospheric blasts rather than on-the-ground incidents like Chernobyl, effected birth gender across the globe...

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    In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
    REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
  • Lost Sheep McUinnean
    Linguistics and Translation Consultant
    True Christian™
    • Nov 2009
    • 2193

    #2
    Re: How to Ensure Bountiful Supply of Sons

    The only thing I'd worry about is the increase in homers in future generations. There should ALWAYS be more women than men.

    Can't have men cooking for themselves and doing laundry.

    Comment

    • RectumDevil=)
      Confirmed Enemy of God
      BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
      • Jun 2011
      • 5

      #3
      Re: How to Ensure Bountiful Supply of Sons

      I know why I found this forum now! I have discovered the secret to the christian strength. (Christians are wrong by the way, it's not faith in god) There are too many christians, that's it.

      THE NON-VIOLENT WAR ON christianity HAS BEGUN! (I know how christians just love those non-violent wars) I will have as many atheist daughters as possible and their daughters will be atheist and theirs... wait I just remembered I don't care enough about christian crazies to devote that much effort. My time here on this forum is done. I am going to go make an atheist baby out of wedlock now... (I feel obligated) oh yeah!

      Comment

      • María Gálvez-Villalobos
        Claims not to be a dago slut
        Unintelligible motor-mouthed Spaniardess; earplugs advised
        • Mar 2011
        • 1307

        #4
        Re: How to Ensure Bountiful Supply of Sons

        Originally posted by RectumDevil=) View Post
        I know why I found this forum now! I have discovered the secret to the christian strength. (Christians are wrong by the way, it's not faith in god) There are too many christians, that's it.

        THE NON-VIOLENT WAR ON christianity HAS BEGUN! (I know how christians just love those non-violent wars) I will have as many atheist daughters as possible and their daughters will be atheist and theirs... wait I just remembered I don't care enough about christian crazies to devote that much effort. My time here on this forum is done. I am going to go make an atheist baby out of wedlock now... (I feel obligated) oh yeah!

        Are you member of a especial needs's school or something?
        Ex JW and quiet, shy, timid girl who wants to be a True Cristian Lady.
        My favorite verse from the Bible is:
        - A true WITNESSE deliuereth soules: but a deceitfull WITNESSE speaketh lyes.

        Comment

        • Cranky Old Man
          Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
          You kids get off his lawn!
           
          • Jan 2010
          • 22378

          #5
          Re: How to Ensure Bountiful Supply of Sons

          Originally posted by RectumDevil=) View Post
          THE NON-VIOLENT WAR ON christianity HAS BEGUN! (I know how christians just love those non-violent wars) I will have as many atheist daughters as possible and their daughters will be atheist and theirs...
          So, what happens if you get a son?
          5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
          To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
          James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

          Comment

          • Frederick Bloomers
            Forum Member
            Forum Member
            • Apr 2011
            • 48

            #6
            Re: How to Ensure Bountiful Supply of Sons

            Originally posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
            So, what happens if you get a son?
            Then it is a sign that God's will will be done, and foolish sinners cannot hope to go against it. I am sure this would be enough to convert any atheist who wasn't also a total idiot (though let us be honest, most are).

            Comment

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