Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

[SUV]

So today's the Big Day and He/he is nowhere around. Did The Word™ leak out about the Special loaf of Dungbread I made Him/him and he is such a shy Man he/He figured there wouldn't be enough to go around for everyone, figuring that "It's Better to give than Receive?"

Pastor Ezekiel! Come back to your Confederacy of Christians! ! I won't call you E-Z Eek any more in public!
There's still plenty of my Good Dungbread left, with lots of your own private-label Beverage to wash it down with

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Happy Birthday Zeke! (Assuming you're still alive... )

[SodaStream]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Birthdays are SCIENCE's way of making you stop thinking about God and think about yourself.

If you celebrate your own birthday it is the same as masturbation and gayetry and you will burn in the lake of fire with the sodomites and athiests.

If you celebrate the birthday of another male (and you yourself are male) then this is an act of gayism and you will burn in the lake of fire.

If you celebrate the birthday of ANYONE ELSE you love God less! This is a fact!

Mark 13:22

For false Christs and false prophets shall rise, and shall shewe signes and wonders, to seduce, if it were possible, euen the elect.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

ProvHerbs 5:12-15

Monster grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the strength to change the things I can, and the Noodle to know the difference. I remember that an elephant never forgets, but i forget what the elephant remembered. The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. Flying Spaghetti Monster, please give me the hunger to eat the pasta I can, the humility to accept that I can eat no more when too full, and the wisdom to remember where I live when I'm trashed on Holy Friday.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob
Cancer (21 JUN-22 JUL)
Still no word from the Dragon’s Den about your asparagus-flavoured baby milk that lets you know when your baby’s wet its nappy.

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

you celebrate the birthday of another male (and you yourself are male) then this is an act of gayism and you will burn in the lake of fire.

Um, did you just call me a fag?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Um, did you just call me a fag?

I think he did, I also think he is saying that if you celebrate the birthday of the baby jesus you are also a fag, or does it not count when it comes to mythical people?

[SUV]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Birthdays are SCIENCE's way of making you stop thinking about God and think about yourself. Blah, blah, blah.

Although I may be Damned to Hell forever for this (by our Church Pastors).....WTF?!?!?!

How dare you try to ruin Pastor Ezekiel's Birth-day like this?!

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

How dare you try to ruin Pastor Ezekiel's Birth-day like this?!

See the half-hearted apology I had to force out of him here.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Although I may be Damned to Hell forever for this (by our Church Pastors).....WTF?!?!?!

Don't worry: Sarah Palin says it all the time now.

[SodaStream]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

In light of having been formerly introduced to the heirachy of this forum I'd like to wish Happy Birthday to the Pastor!

In regards to the witch hunt forming against me;

Know who else does witch hunts? WITCHES! that's right. Please forgive me for overstepping the pecking order here on my induction into these Godly forums.

I hope the good pastor and my fellow brothers and sisters can see my intentions here are good.

[Sister Kitty]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Happy Birthday Pastor Ezekiel! FedEx will be delivering 100lbs of juicy polar bear steaks to you before 5 PM. Enjoy!

[Nobar King]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Are you suggesting that the pastor is a witch? Because in case you didn't notice he's a dude.

[Sister Kitty]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

In light of having been formerly introduced to the heirachy of this forum I'd like to wish Happy Birthday to the Pastor!

It is good that you are are learning to mind your place, little boy. Do not displease me by stepping out of line again.

[Mary-Yves Lapierre]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Bon Fête Pastor Ezekiels!! I am hoping you have much pea soup and much poutines today!!

Thank you for all the private instructions you have giving me!!

[John Creeser]

Re: Blessed Birthday, PASTOR EZEKIEL!!!

Happy Birthday Pastor Ezekiel. I trust you enjoyed my wife's pie she delivered to you last night. Stupid woman was an hour late, said she got lost on the way home. How many times has she been to your place and she still gets lost