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  • Ixi
    Wretched Unsaved Goth
    Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
    • Sep 2006
    • 844
    #136
    Re: OMFG

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
    Being raped is a natural part of being a female when you live outside of God's Grace. When you spit on Jesus the way you and your sisters do, rape is the least of your worries.
    Whatever. To tell you the truth, I feel pretty bad for all of you.
    A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

      Comment

      • Pastor Al E Pistle
        Christ's Cōnsiliārius
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 9323
        #137
        Re: OMFG

        Originally posted by Ixi View Post
        Whatever. To tell you the truth, I feel pretty bad for all of you.
        You can feel better RIGHT AWAY! Get the warden's credit card and make a love donation to JESUS. Just hit that PayPal button right on the bottom of this page and you will feel a LOT better!
        Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
        "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
        Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


          Comment

          • Ixi
            Wretched Unsaved Goth
            Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
            • Sep 2006
            • 844
            #138
            Re: OMFG

            Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
            You can feel better RIGHT AWAY! Get the warden's credit card and make a love donation to JESUS. Just hit that PayPal button right on the bottom of this page and you will feel a LOT better!
            I knew it! You just want money! Hellion and I think you are just a bunch of Christain posers who want to make a few bucks. Maybe thats how you get so rich...
            A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

              Comment

              • Pastor Ezekiel
                Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                 
                • Sep 2006
                • 78556
                #139
                Re: OMFG

                Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                I knew it! You just want money! Hellion and I think you are just a bunch of Christain posers who want to make a few bucks. Maybe thats how you get so rich...
                We have explained this to you before; we pastors are penniless. The money you donate goes directly toward spreading the Good News about Jesus. We are only interested in saving your soul. Jet fuel is expensive you know....
                Who Will Jesus Damn?

                Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                  Comment

                  • Ixi
                    Wretched Unsaved Goth
                    Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 844
                    #140
                    Re: OMFG

                    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                    We have explained this to you before; we pastors are penniless.
                    Coming from the guy who has a mansion with Arabian horses.
                    A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

                      Comment

                      • Pastor Al E Pistle
                        Christ's Cōnsiliārius
                         
                        • Sep 2006
                        • 9323
                        #141
                        Re: OMFG

                        Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                        Coming from the guy who has a mansion with Arabian horses.
                        Icky, it's Sunday morning where you are. Why aren't you in church?
                        Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                        "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                        Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


                          Comment

                          • Ixi
                            Wretched Unsaved Goth
                            Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
                            • Sep 2006
                            • 844
                            #142
                            Re: OMFG

                            Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
                            Icky, it's Sunday morning where you are. Why aren't you in church?
                            Because I don't go to church, I'm Pagan. My gosh, what a stupid question.
                            A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

                              Comment

                              • Enobarbus
                                Professor of English Landover University
                                True Christian™
                                • Sep 2006
                                • 3496
                                #143
                                Re: OMFG

                                Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                                Because I don't go to church, I'm Pagan. My gosh, what a stupid question.
                                BTW are you aware that Adia is trying to sign up? She's really too young.
                                Revelation 21:8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.

                                  Comment

                                  • Pastor Al E Pistle
                                    Christ's Cōnsiliārius
                                     
                                    • Sep 2006
                                    • 9323
                                    #144
                                    Re: OMFG

                                    I'm sure she's aware of it. They only have one computer in that house.
                                    Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                                    "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                                    Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


                                      Comment

                                      • Ixi
                                        Wretched Unsaved Goth
                                        Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
                                        • Sep 2006
                                        • 844
                                        #145
                                        Re: OMFG

                                        Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
                                        I'm sure she's aware of it. They only have one computer in that house.
                                        Whats wrong with only having one computer? I'm lucky to even have a computer.
                                        A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

                                          Comment

                                          • Pastor Al E Pistle
                                            Christ's Cōnsiliārius
                                             
                                            • Sep 2006
                                            • 9323
                                            #146
                                            Re: OMFG

                                            Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                                            Whats wrong with only having one computer? I'm lucky to even have a computer.
                                            Yes you are. and it's going to be sold pretty soon so you can eat. You poor starving kids....eating spaghetti-os and hustling drugs. Please go to church.
                                            Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                                            "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                                            Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


                                              Comment

                                              • Ixi
                                                Wretched Unsaved Goth
                                                Ixi, have you done your homework yet?
                                                • Sep 2006
                                                • 844
                                                #147
                                                Re: OMFG

                                                Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
                                                Yes you are. and it's going to be sold pretty soon so you can eat. You poor starving kids....eating spaghetti-os and hustling drugs.

                                                Why do you always say that Pagans take drugs? I'll bet none of them do. And spaghetti-os are Mmm Mmm good!

                                                Please go to church.

                                                And how will that solve anything?
                                                Going to church will solve nothing.
                                                A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.

                                                  Comment

                                                  • Pastor Al E Pistle
                                                    Christ's Cōnsiliārius
                                                     
                                                    • Sep 2006
                                                    • 9323
                                                    #148
                                                    Re: OMFG

                                                    Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                                                    Going to church will solve nothing.
                                                    You can all find husbands at church. Just like ME! Won't that be great?
                                                    Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                                                    "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                                                    Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


                                                      Comment

                                                      • Brother Temperance
                                                        Senior Usher
                                                        True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                                                        A very nice young man
                                                        True Christian™
                                                        • Sep 2006
                                                        • 15621
                                                        #149
                                                        Re: OMFG

                                                        Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                                                        Why do you always say that Pagans take drugs?
                                                        Because it is utterly implausible that anyone could take that kind of nonsensical mumbo-jumbo seriously unless they were under the influence of some very harmful substances.
                                                        O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                                                        God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                                                          Comment

                                                          • Pastor Ezekiel
                                                            Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                                                             
                                                            • Sep 2006
                                                            • 78556
                                                            #150
                                                            Re: OMFG

                                                            Originally posted by Ixi View Post
                                                            Coming from the guy who has a mansion with Arabian horses.
                                                            Everything is owned by our church...for tax purposes.
                                                            Who Will Jesus Damn?

                                                            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                                                            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                                                            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                                                              Comment

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