Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

As most of you know, I recently had the extreme satisfaction of banning that pesky chinaman Hiroshi from these Godly boards forever. my reasons were sound and beyond reproach, as always. The little slant was a sexual deviant and a God mocker who had it in for me from day one.

However, it has come to my attention that there are some, both unsaved scum and True Christians™ within my own congregation, who feel that we should give the vile gook a second chance. I want to go on record here and now by saying I think this would be a colossal mistake. However, i must respond to the Tithers members wishes. Therefore, I will put it to a vote.

You have one week to cast your ballot, and the voting is open to all. I promise to abide by the group's decision. I strongly urge you all to pray over this matter carefully, and review the many blasphemous posts made by the sneaky jap bastard over the past year or so before making your decision.

Please explain why you voted the way you did.

I, of course, will do the final counting of the votes. Praise Jesus.

[WickedWitch]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

Hmm... This is a first... Asking what the unsaved posters think, and making a decision based on what their input... Actually considering their thoughts and opinions as valid. I must admit, I'm truly surprised.

That being said, what were the reasons that Hitoshi was banned? I'm not calling your judgement into question, but I think we should know these reasons and decided whether or not they are forgivable. Secondly, you mentioned "many blasphemous posts" made by Hitoshi, could you provide quotes of, or links to said posts (so that we don't have to go searching through hundreds of posts looking for one or two specific offensive remarks)?

[Wide-Open]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

I miss the option "He should have been casted in hell after his first day.", so I went with the best fit.

Mrs. Undediced: don't you think this was rather cruel?

[Miss Maisie]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

While I do believe there may be a chance to save the little monkey's soul, in the end, the decision of one of our pastors is what's important.

So, while I done agreed with Pastor Zeke, I do ask him to consider than we may yet save the little Godless savage.

[WickedWitch]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

Mrs. Undediced: don't you think this was rather cruel?

Just "Miss", I'm not married. And you're right, that was mean.

[One-eyed Jack]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

Compendium of Hitoshious Blasphemies

(I would subtitle this "Wit and Wisdom of Hitoshi" except for the obvious reason)

I think these posts speak for themselves.

Hitoshi on Lesbians: "NOBODY is clean carpet same like Hitoshi (explain for american I am talk about oral stimulate). call my carpet clean service Ladies I am have very reasonable rate! afterward I am sprinkle my patented powder for stain resist!!!"

Hitoshi on America Politics: "okay how come nobody is ever talk about asian president? Japanese are discipline and have much honor (is make good leader). I am sick all this racism. you guy are need for open your mind."

Hitoshi on small manhood: "give me break I was just get out of water. now what time I am pick you up for date?"

Hitoshi on Christian charity: "landover baptist you guy know I am not have much money (am student give me break). maybe True christian is buy plane ticket for me. first class please I need stretch legs or they fall asleep (is legitimate medical condition okay).I love all my brother and sister at landover."

Hitoshi on the economic stimulus package: "I was get turn on when see 'stimulus' and 'package' in thread title. I was very disappoint when open thread. no more false advertise okay."

Hitoshi on the Ask a Dutchman thread: "this another example of someone steal Japanese idea and is total ridiculous. you cracker are have no shame. this total rip off my Ask Japanese thread. my question is how are you sleep at night when bring yourself and family much dishonor with steal of other people idea?"

Hitoshi on sports: "Japanese like play white man sport for prove we are best. is same reason we play with your white women."

Hitoshi on sleeping in public: "Japanese not lazy like american. these salariman are work hard long hour this is why sleeping in public. I am work hard long hour with american women so I am sometime sleep in public too."

Hitoshi on Chinese posters: "you are dirty communist who eat dog and kill girl baby. I am rather be fat dumb american over chinese any day. plus I am token Asian at landover here. you are need find different church forum okay."

Hitoshi on Pearl Harbor: "okay I am visitor in your country and your are need for show RESPECT. and YOU are start war with Japan we were only defend ourself. we attack pearl harbor because we were know you could not keep your big fat american nose out our business. And believe Japan easily win war if you guy not CHEAT with atom bomb. Japan was ready for attack stronger than ever and then you guy dropping bombs like school girl."

Hitoshi on the American National Sport: "If you are want play baseball you and me game is over quick. I am get home run and you are run home with tail of dog between your leg. Nobody is beat Japanese at baseball."

Hitoshi on hitting up Rachel von Helsing: "okay you and me go on fugu date. We are eat fugu and laugh and have sexy time. I tell all my girl so I am tell you do not forget bring your toothbrush and pajama....who care if that you are married? Husband is never need know. what happen in Hitoshi bedroom stay in Hitoshi bedroom."

Hitoshi on Japanese women: "Japanese woman genital is same american only is clean and smell like delicious blue berry muffin. is also have much vitamin and mineral. many man are for curious about Japanese woman this because they are never get sleep with Japanese woman. Japanese woman is have HONOR and respect for self. only honorable Japanese man is have delicate flower that are Japanese woman."

Hitoshi on being rebuffed by Rachel von Helsing: "[Japanese women] is big different from rachel van hesling. NO man is need be curious for her. you are just need type rachel van hesling on mapquest for get direction to her genital (is no big secret)"

Hitoshi on procreation: "if all Japanese gay how is Japanese make more Japanese give me break. my question is how american having intercourse with so much fat. I am like to see nature film for this."

Hitoshi on Japanese game shows: "I am never on game show but I would love! Japanese game show are much clever and fun! one my favorite is contestant must say difficult sentence (is tongue twist) without make mistake. if make mistake contestant is hit in genital. ha ha."

Hitoshi on chopsticks: "I am also want say chopstick is make for sexy fun time in bed (this I will give personal instruction). I am wish good luck and good eating!"

Hitoshi on women's undergarments: "I am happy wash lady underwear (am have panty fetish okay am not embarrass is total healthy normal). silk is favorite but also am like boy short hubba bubba!"

Hitoshi hitting on Lady Sorrow: "I am have question for you honey. how many lick is it take for get to your tootsie roll center? I pick you up for date tonight for find out. bring toothbrush and pajama."

Hitoshi on driving skills: "yes I am bad driver. last night I rear end your wife."

Hitoshi on quality posting: "nice post. do everyone favor and join writer strike okay."

Hitoshi hitting on everything female: "My brother is come for visit in two week (is live in Japan). I am need girl for act like girl friend (will need show affection much kiss hug and grope okay (same like horny teenager)). I was tell brother I am have sexy American girlfriend with blond hair and big boob so must have these feature. I am not afford pay for this help (am college student okay) but will say many Shinto prayer for bring you happy luck! also you are must call me 'sugar crotch' (I was tell brother this is nick name you are give for me). CLEAN girl only (no herpe or crab). much thank you ladies!!! line forms to right!!!!"

Hitoshi on being rebuffed by everything female: "AGAIN I am try 'meet christian single' and AGAIN I am not find girl! total ridiculous! I am not understand why girl are not respond I am complete package okay...pretty boy face, beef cake body, smart, good singer, sexy accent, give good hot oil massage and sense for humor. I AM NEVER TRY FOR MEET LADY HERE AGAIN OKAY. YOUR LOSS LADIES."

[WickedWitch]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

Compendium of Hitoshious Blasphemies

So, he was banned for being horny and offensive, right? Sounds like any normal teenaged boy to me. Perhaps if he cleaned up his language and behaviour he could return?


By the way, OEJ, I love you *Swoons*

[Justina Thyme]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

I know I'm in the minority, but I must repeat my earlier request that the little yellow 'tard be reinstated. He has put forth some small effort to at least learn rudimentary Engrish, and may even learn to speak a quasi-acceptable form of American someday.

And as we say, God has guided him here for some (admittedly yet unfathomable) reason; He does move in mysterious ways. Perhaps Pastor Zeke has been divinely inspired to ask this congregation's opinion on this matter because Hibachi's time here is not yet done.

[VictoryOS]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

Compendium of Hitoshious Blasphemies

(I would subtitle this "Wit and Wisdom of Hitoshi" except for the obvious reason)

I think these posts speak for themselves.

Wow. It's breathtaking when you see it all together like that.

[Nobar King]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

Does HE actually tithe any money? If so, then my vote is yes.

If no, then I vote BAN!!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

Compendium of Hitoshious Blasphemies

(I would subtitle this "Wit and Wisdom of Hitoshi" except for the obvious reason)

I think these posts speak for themselves.

Hitoshi on Lesbians: "NOBODY is clean carpet same like Hitoshi (explain for american I am talk about oral stimulate). call my carpet clean service Ladies I am have very reasonable rate! afterward I am sprinkle my patented powder for stain resist!!!"

Hitoshi on America Politics: "okay how come nobody is ever talk about asian president? Japanese are discipline and have much honor (is make good leader). I am sick all this racism. you guy are need for open your mind."

Hitoshi on small manhood: "give me break I was just get out of water. now what time I am pick you up for date?"

Hitoshi on Christian charity: "landover baptist you guy know I am not have much money (am student give me break). maybe True christian is buy plane ticket for me. first class please I need stretch legs or they fall asleep (is legitimate medical condition okay).I love all my brother and sister at landover."

Hitoshi on the economic stimulus package: "I was get turn on when see 'stimulus' and 'package' in thread title. I was very disappoint when open thread. no more false advertise okay."

Hitoshi on the Ask a Dutchman thread: "this another example of someone steal Japanese idea and is total ridiculous. you cracker are have no shame. this total rip off my Ask Japanese thread. my question is how are you sleep at night when bring yourself and family much dishonor with steal of other people idea?"

Hitoshi on sports: "Japanese like play white man sport for prove we are best. is same reason we play with your white women."

Hitoshi on sleeping in public: "Japanese not lazy like american. these salariman are work hard long hour this is why sleeping in public. I am work hard long hour with american women so I am sometime sleep in public too."

Hitoshi on Chinese posters: "you are dirty communist who eat dog and kill girl baby. I am rather be fat dumb american over chinese any day. plus I am token Asian at landover here. you are need find different church forum okay."

Hitoshi on Pearl Harbor: "okay I am visitor in your country and your are need for show RESPECT. and YOU are start war with Japan we were only defend ourself. we attack pearl harbor because we were know you could not keep your big fat american nose out our business. And believe Japan easily win war if you guy not CHEAT with atom bomb. Japan was ready for attack stronger than ever and then you guy dropping bombs like school girl."

Hitoshi on the American National Sport: "If you are want play baseball you and me game is over quick. I am get home run and you are run home with tail of dog between your leg. Nobody is beat Japanese at baseball."

Hitoshi on hitting up Rachel von Helsing: "okay you and me go on fugu date. We are eat fugu and laugh and have sexy time. I tell all my girl so I am tell you do not forget bring your toothbrush and pajama....who care if that you are married? Husband is never need know. what happen in Hitoshi bedroom stay in Hitoshi bedroom."

Hitoshi on Japanese women: "Japanese woman genital is same american only is clean and smell like delicious blue berry muffin. is also have much vitamin and mineral. many man are for curious about Japanese woman this because they are never get sleep with Japanese woman. Japanese woman is have HONOR and respect for self. only honorable Japanese man is have delicate flower that are Japanese woman."

Hitoshi on being rebuffed by Rachel von Helsing: "[Japanese women] is big different from rachel van hesling. NO man is need be curious for her. you are just need type rachel van hesling on mapquest for get direction to her genital (is no big secret)"

Hitoshi on procreation: "if all Japanese gay how is Japanese make more Japanese give me break. my question is how american having intercourse with so much fat. I am like to see nature film for this."

Hitoshi on Japanese game shows: "I am never on game show but I would love! Japanese game show are much clever and fun! one my favorite is contestant must say difficult sentence (is tongue twist) without make mistake. if make mistake contestant is hit in genital. ha ha."

Hitoshi on chopsticks: "I am also want say chopstick is make for sexy fun time in bed (this I will give personal instruction). I am wish good luck and good eating!"

Hitoshi on women's undergarments: "I am happy wash lady underwear (am have panty fetish okay am not embarrass is total healthy normal). silk is favorite but also am like boy short hubba bubba!"

Hitoshi hitting on Lady Sorrow: "I am have question for you honey. how many lick is it take for get to your tootsie roll center? I pick you up for date tonight for find out. bring toothbrush and pajama."

Hitoshi on driving skills: "yes I am bad driver. last night I rear end your wife."

Hitoshi on quality posting: "nice post. do everyone favor and join writer strike okay."

Hitoshi hitting on everything female: "My brother is come for visit in two week (is live in Japan). I am need girl for act like girl friend (will need show affection much kiss hug and grope okay (same like horny teenager)). I was tell brother I am have sexy American girlfriend with blond hair and big boob so must have these feature. I am not afford pay for this help (am college student okay) but will say many Shinto prayer for bring you happy luck! also you are must call me 'sugar crotch' (I was tell brother this is nick name you are give for me). CLEAN girl only (no herpe or crab). much thank you ladies!!! line forms to right!!!!"

Hitoshi on being rebuffed by everything female: "AGAIN I am try 'meet christian single' and AGAIN I am not find girl! total ridiculous! I am not understand why girl are not respond I am complete package okay...pretty boy face, beef cake body, smart, good singer, sexy accent, give good hot oil massage and sense for humor. I AM NEVER TRY FOR MEET LADY HERE AGAIN OKAY. YOUR LOSS LADIES."

Reading this small sampling of his posts makes me taste bile. I'm tempted to change my vote to bring him back in, just so I can have the pleasure of BANNING HIM AGAIN!!

[One-eyed Jack]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

And that's not nearly complete, Sister Victory. I accidentally closed the search window before I had cherrypicked all the little nipper's posts. The labor was like unto the labors of Hakazzar when he the searched the Chamberpots of Zenob for one honest man.

~~ OEJ

[Father Thomas Martin]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

I say we are ALL God's children, and God made all of us people with hopes that we might be happy with Him forever in Heaven.

That said, we have a strong Japanese Catholic community in Southeast Wisconsin...I vote YES, because if you let him back, maybe I could lead him to the Trinity (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit)

So I voted that you should bring him back-And if Pastor Zeke voids public opinion to win the vote, then he is a dictator and must be overthrown with the help of "Godly" President Bush.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

I voted No because my pastor and my husband both agree Hitoshi is best kept from normal people, so they told me how to vote.

[Roberta]

Re: Should The Little Yellow Devil Hitoshi Be Allowed Back?

"I am only have present for the ladies"


Skat is among the vilest of all perversions! Only the Blood of Christ could cleanse Homoshi's putrid yellow and brown countenance.

Homoshi is pondscum and unfit to associate with humans, whether Saved or not. I say banish him to a mungo cave in the heathenlands of Australia. The maggots can feast upon him while he contemplates his fiery reward.

I fully support Pastor Zeke's Divinely inspired decision!