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Your zeal for God has inspired us all, young man. I suppose the only thing more exciting than becoming a white, Godly, True Christian™ man is staying one for another year.
Pastor Ed
Pastor Ed
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Congratulations on getting another year closer to Jesus. Hopefully the Rapture will happen before your next birthday.Isaiah 66:15
For behold, the Lord wil come with fire, and with his charets like a whirlewinde, to render his anger with furie, and his rebuke with flames of fire. -
Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Many happy returns, Brother! With all of your tireless work converting the heathens I'm sure Jesus has His merciful eye on you to take you to His bosom.
I'm sure soon He will call you to His side: It could be a jet plane crashing into your house, an out break of Ebola, anaphylactic shock from a scorpion in your shoe or even a bizarre accident involving a piano and a Frenchman but rest assured, when He lovingly cuts your life short the crippling pain and overwhelming terror you feel will be as nothing compared to His temporary sacrifice for a predefined subset of humanity, on the Cross.
Glory!1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.
Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.Comment
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Happy birthday, Brother! You are a welcome new addition to Landover Baptist.sigpic Mt 21:42, 44 Jesus saith unto them, Did ye never read in the scriptures, The stone which the builders rejected, the same is become the head of the corner: this is the Lord's doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes . . . ? And whosoever shall fall on this stone shall be broken: but on whomsoever it shall fall, it will grind him to powder.
Find out what the Bible says about: Fortnite: Battle Royale, asexuality, shaving, psychiatry, chronic fatigue syndrome, babiesComment
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Happy Birthday Brother! Always remember that Jesus watches over you, and that you'll always be a day younger than I am.
Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.Comment
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Who?5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
- Protect your family the Christian way! Get your daughter raped!
- Only Sluts Get Raped! (1st Timothy 2:9)
- Down syndrome is a lifestyle choice!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."Comment
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Happy birthday young fellow. God loves those that wait patiently for Him to snuff out their pointless life on Earth to spend eternity rejoicing with Jesus.Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.Comment
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Thank you, my dear Brothers and Sisters in Christ. I intend to spend the evening in silent prayer and contemplation of my Creator, with a select few of His Finest Soldiers. The LBC has become as dear to me as a real family (not like the dirty muslim one I left behind for Jesus)
God Bless
DAMPsalm 137:8-9 O daughter of Babylon, who art to be destroyed; happy shall he be, that rewardeth thee as thou hast served us.
Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Brother!
Here's hoping that this time next year, we can all celebrate the day together at the side of Our Lord.
YiC
AW2 Timothy 3:16
All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
Well, I am late to the party, my apologies. I did order a little something from that joo store, Neiman-Marcus as I passed through Teaxs this morning. I hope you like it.
Attached FilesIsaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.Comment
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
While late, my wish is very true
I pray your day was good for you
I hope that angels guarded your ways
And kept you safe from whores and gays
May your time on earth be super swell
And may your enemies burn in hell
In manly love,
Brother LarryComment
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
A belated, blessed birthday to you, Brother in Christ!
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Re: Happy Birthday, Bro. Mordecai!
That. Is. Beautiful.Originally posted by James Hutchins View PostWell, I am late to the party, my apologies. I did order a little something from that joo store, Neiman-Marcus as I passed through Teaxs this morning. I hope you like it.
It's almost as though God himself blew down the barrel with His Sweet Breath of Life
Originally posted by Brother Larry View Post
I accept your poem in a distantly thankful, extremely hetero True Christian™ way.
Thankyou Brother Larry, for your verse
The Blessing is that I have earned your friendship, Sister MaryOriginally posted by Mary Etheldreda View PostA belated, blessed birthday to you, Brother in Christ!
God Bless you all
DAMPsalm 137:8-9 O daughter of Babylon, who art to be destroyed; happy shall he be, that rewardeth thee as thou hast served us.
Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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