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  • Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

    Why didn't we think of THIS? A TV Pastor from Florida has sent the mudslime terrorist Obasa Bind Laddan a video with an ultimatum from Jesus. THIS should have been OUR video message!

    Switcheroo: American minister sends video to Osama
    Says he's damned to hell if he doesn't repent, convert

    WASHINGTON – An American television evangelist has turned the tables on al-Qaida terrorist leader Osama bin Laden – sending him a video message warning him to repent of his sins and convert to Christianity.

    "Osama, since you seem to be a fan of video messages, I thought this would be the best way to communicate with you," says Bill Keller, host of the Florida-based "Live Prayer" TV program as well as LivePrayer.com in a message being posted to YouTube and 20 other major video sites in the U.S. as well as some 50 in the Middle East.

    Keller said his goal was to reach out to bin Laden with a message of salvation.

    "Look at you, look at your life," Keller says. "You live like a hunted goat in caves, totally dependent on a small group of people for your survival. At any moment, one of those you trust could betray you like Judas betrayed Jesus and your life would be over. The false prophet you follow, Mohammad, was poisoned to death by one of his wives."

    Keller continues: "It is against the most basic standard of good and evil that your life, Osama, will be judged by historians and future generations to be one of pure, unbridled evil."

    Keller has harsh words not only for bin Laden, but for Islam, as well.

    "You followed the same path as the false prophet you have put your faith in – Mohammad – who, like you, was once a businessman, but who history has recorded was nothing more than a murdering pedophile who led men's souls to eternal damnation with the false religion he created," Keller says. "Islam is a 1,400-year-old lie that was born out of the voice of Satan – literally. Mohammad was correct when he stated it was Satan who initially spoke to him. He dreamed up his own god, Allah, a poor imitation of the God of the Bible, and inspired his own holy book, the Quran, a cheap imitation of the inspired, inerrant Word of God found in the Bible."

    Keller calls bin Laden a "coward" and a "tool of Satan."

    "There are no virgins waiting for you in Paradise when you die, only Satan and the everlasting punishment of hell," said Keller. "The good news I have come to deliver to you is that you, yes, even you Osama, can escape God's wrath. He loves you so much, that He sent Jesus to die for your sins, all of them, every last one! Yes Osama, even you can be saved and enter into the Glory of Heaven. Not some fictitious place called "paradise" with women waiting to have sex with you, but the home of God where you can find eternal peace and rest when your life on this earth is over."

    He also directed some harsh words to Adam Gadahn, the former California heavy-metal music aficionado who converted to Islamism and joined al-Qaida.

    "First off, you are out of your mind!" Keller says. "I read your life story. Your hero Osama was born into this lie of Islam, you were born here in the United States, exposed to the Truth of God's Word, yet you rejected that Truth and embraced the lie of Islam? You listened to too much heavy metal music dude! It rotted your brain. Look at you. You are now living like a hunted dog in the middle of hell on earth. You are using your life to further the hatred and murder and evil of this street gang you have joined. Haven't you figured out their only goal is death and destruction?"

    Last month, a CBS television station in Tampa, Fla., announced it was taking "Live Prayer with Bill Keller" off the air after the local chapter of the Council on American-Islamic Relations complained of the religious views Keller expressed.

    CAIR-Tampa issued a statement that "WTOG-TV (CS44) dropped 'Live Prayer' after the station and its parent company CBS received a letter from and had discussions with the Islamic civil rights and advocacy group."

    Last May, Keller made news when he charged a vote for GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney, a Mormon, was "a vote for Satan."

    "If you vote for Mitt Romney, you are voting for Satan!" he wrote in his daily devotional sent out to 2.4 million e-mail subscribers.

    Keller was a businessman convicted of insider trading in 1989, a crime for which he served more than two years in federal prison. After getting out, he received a degree in biblical studies from Liberty University in Lynchburg, Virginia, and has been in full-time ministry ever since.
    He sure is right about Romney being satan too!
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

  • #2
    Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
    Why didn't we think of THIS?
    What, communicating with Bin Laden? I don't think I'm allowed to comment on that.

    I can say though, for those of you who keep emailing me about the missionary we sent: quit praying for him. He switched sides.
    Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 09-16-2007, 03:13 AM.
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    • #3
      Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
      Why didn't we think of THIS? A TV Pastor from Florida has sent the mudslime terrorist Obasa Bind Laddan a video with an ultimatum from Jesus. THIS should have been OUR video message!
      No doubt others will be copying him, let's be the first onto the bandwagon. 1,000,000,000 million bonus points to whoever writes the best script.

      Here's mine:

      "Yo, Osama, the Osamonator, the Osamamiester, Samiaminator, blowin' up the buildings, wasaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap? Your homie Trent wants to rap wid ya, you down brothah?

      Dig the beard, chixdiggit, youknowwhatimsayin'? Look, this whole suicide bombing thing, I ain't down wid dat. Make you look like a busta.

      Yo, you should chill with my homie Jesus. Jesus is da sh
      "

      Okay, I just remembered Obama is the black one and Osama is the Iranian one. Time to try a new approach.

      "So you're praying to his Allah guy. how's that been working out. Hm, did you pray to live in caves with bats pooing on you while your wives are getting humped by Christian soldiers? Did you pray for that, huh? Well, looks like this Allah guy isn't fulfilling on his contract, is he?

      Look, I know the whole idea of converting to a different religion seems like a big step, but it's really not a big deal. Let's take a look at the actual beliefs you'll have to change:

      Places we agree: Homosexuals. Smut on TV. Feminism. Premtive strikes on neutral nations. International treaties. The U.N. Killing russians. Killing Iraqis. Discipline of children. All your oil are belong to us. Abortion is murder (the bad kind of murder). Clinton is evil. Killing New Yorkers. Atheists. Gun control. Taxes. Separation of religion and state. Capital punishment. Religious schools. Building world-spanning empires. Creationism. Jews. Proxy peasents as cannon fodder. Women's lib etc."

      Places we disagree: beards.

      Dude, I think we can work out the beard thing.

      C'mon man, pray for the winning team: Jesus. C'maaaaaaawwwwwwwn! C'maaawwwwwwwwwwwn!
      "
      Founder and CEO of Trickle-Down Charities™, LLC.

      Current Project: Bedmates For Billionaires: Biblical eldercare straight from King David
      Goal:
      $500,000 Currently raised: $0.11 DONATE NOW! Yes, we accept Biblecoins!

      True Christians™ believe they they exist to serve the Bible-revealed will of God.
      False Christians believe the Bible exists to serve their will. GOD IS NOT YOUR YES-MAN!

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

        Originally posted by Trent Harvey, Jr. View Post
        Places we agree: Homosexuals. Smut on TV. Feminism. Premtive strikes on neutral nations. International treaties. The U.N. Killing russians. Killing Iraqis. Discipline of children. All your oil are belong to us. Abortion is murder (the bad kind of murder). Clinton is evil. Killing New Yorkers. Atheists. Gun control. Taxes. Separation of religion and state. Capital punishment. Religious schools. Building world-spanning empires. Creationism. Jews. Proxy peasents as cannon fodder. Women's lib etc."
        You could probably list more, but I'm surprised that we have so much in common.
        May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

          Im sure that a message from an AM radio host is top priority for Osama. Not to mention the fact that if the pastor really knew where to send the video then perhaps the military could just follow the mail to him. Im also wondering if criticism has ever made any one of these radicals a Christian?

          If anything it probably pushes them further in the other direction. Its probably better not to communicate with them at all.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

            Originally posted by Logical Thinking View Post
            Im also wondering if criticism has ever made any one of these radicals a Christian?

            If anything it probably pushes them further in the other direction. Its probably better not to communicate with them at all.
            Yet you don't seem to follow your own logic, do you Mr Logical?

            And I'll have you know that many radicals have seen the light and become Christians, why one of my closest colleges was a hardcore communist who believed government should merge with business, before he converted to a staunch capitalist, who believes business should merge with government.

            Total 360 degree revolution.
            Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
            Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
            Did I use a new word you've never heard? Definitions here. | Vote! Everything you need to vote here!

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            • #7
              Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

              Originally posted by Trent Harvey, Jr. View Post
              Proxy peasents as cannon fodder.
              What are you referring to there? I didn't get that.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

                Originally posted by raylu View Post
                What are you referring to there? I didn't get that.
                Brother Trent is a genius of economics and as a result does not have the evangelists' knack for speaking in ways mouth-breathing heathens can understand.

                I tend to follow a "point and grunt" leadership style at my factories, due to my employees not being enlightened with the English language, but I think I'll be able to sort this out.

                Bin Laden talks a lot about the glory of blowing one's self up. However, when it's time to get exploding, he always has other priorities. And despite being extremely wealthy, he still has the ability to convince third-world dirt farmers the world over to fight hopeless wars against suicidal (often literally!) odds.

                America believes in the same approach to geopolitics, for example we encouraged the Kurds and others to rebell against Saddam in 1991, The Hungarians to rebel against the USSR unsupported, Iraq to attack Iran, and of course Israel to provide generations of moslems with a non-Christian punching bag...

                Is any of this sinking in or will we have to get Youth Pastor Marty to give you a completely dumbed-down version?
                Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 09-16-2007, 11:16 PM.
                Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
                Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
                Did I use a new word you've never heard? Definitions here. | Vote! Everything you need to vote here!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

                  What he's doing here is nothing new, between 1973 and 1979 I send Missouri congressman Thomas Eagleton at least 50 threatening video tapes and left at least 100 bullets in his mailbox.
                  sigpic

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

                    Originally posted by Jeb Thurmond View Post
                    when it's time to get exploding, he always has other priorities. And despite being extremely wealthy, he still has the ability to convince third-world dirt farmers the world over to fight hopeless wars against suicidal (often literally!) odds.
                    That was remarkable, Jeb. You seem to be a mastermind at understanding what we in the Green Zone call "strategery".

                    Where did you get such advanced military training? Were you an aide to a congressman? Do makeup for a pundit at Fox News? Intern at the Ceasar institute?
                    Founder and CEO of Trickle-Down Charities™, LLC.

                    Current Project: Bedmates For Billionaires: Biblical eldercare straight from King David
                    Goal:
                    $500,000 Currently raised: $0.11 DONATE NOW! Yes, we accept Biblecoins!

                    True Christians™ believe they they exist to serve the Bible-revealed will of God.
                    False Christians believe the Bible exists to serve their will. GOD IS NOT YOUR YES-MAN!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

                      Oh, that's smart , let someone who has enough power to orchestrate the cause of 9/11 know exactly who you are, what you look like, and that you think his religion is wrong.

                      I'm not saying his intentions weren't noble, but...I'm not going to be too surprised if he finds himself being a practice target for Al Queda boot camp.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

                        If this Osama Bin Laden character was such a threat to the United States our President, in his wisdom, would smoke him out like he did to Saddam Huessein. I'm sure our President has enough on his hands anyway trying to stop the mastermind of 9/11 from becoming the next president of the United States!
                        sigpic

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

                          Originally posted by Wash O'Hanley View Post
                          If this Osama Bin Laden character was such a threat to the United States our President, in his wisdom, would smoke him out like he did to Saddam Huessein. I'm sure our President has enough on his hands anyway trying to stop the mastermind of 9/11 from becoming the next president of the United States!
                          So then who is it that you think is the mastermind of 9/11, if not Osama/Al Queda? Or do you mean that Bush is trying to stop Osama from becoming president?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

                            Originally posted by SinisterPizza View Post
                            So then who is it that you think is the mastermind of 9/11, if not Osama/Al Queda? Or do you mean that Bush is trying to stop Osama from becoming president?
                            He is talking about Hilary Clinton. Were does Osama Ben Ladin come into 9/11?

                            Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

                            Hot Must ReadThreads!


                            Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

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                            • #15
                              Re: Pastor Sends Video To Obsama Ben Laden

                              Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
                              He is talking about Hilary Clinton. Were does Osama Ben Ladin come into 9/11?
                              If Hillary were elected, 9/11 would seem like a Sunday picnic after church. Pray to Jesus that she never be allowed to fly planes into buildings again!
                              Who Will Jesus Damn?

                              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                              Comment

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