[Lycia The Repentant]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?



I ordered a whole bunch of these off of Amazon, but it turns out they are CDs, not boxes of actual candy-coated razorblades.

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

I ordered a whole bunch of these off of Amazon, but it turns out they are CDs, not boxes of actual candy-coated razorblades.

Oh..well perhaps giving out the Cd's will be a punishment and ruination in itself. Did you listen to it?

Sister Phebe

[Lycia The Repentant]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

Oh..well perhaps giving out the Cd's will be a punishment and ruination in itself. Did you listen to it?

Sister Phebe

The thought did occur to me, but then I had an even better idea. I'm going to change the discs with these



I know it will end up being the highlight of these kids' Halloween now, but I'd rather gain a chance at saving their souls than a chance at ruining their fun.

[Wash O'Hanley]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

On my way home from work last night I saw a house that had some lousy styrofoam grave yard out front and a stupid, expensive-looking animatronic Michael Myers from the movie Halloween that would move around and played the Halloween theme music, so I stole it from their yard, took it to my house, put a suit and Regan mask on it and hacked the music player so it plays his "Tear Down This Wall" speech.

[Rick 'Magma' Bocchino]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

My next door neighbor constructed an entire cemetery in his front yard with styrofoam headpieces. Last night I went over there after he went to bed and broke them all in half. This morning when he was outside cleaning everything up I told him I saw some teenagers do it. HAW-HAW!

[Wash O'Hanley]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

I went to the Blockbuster video in Des Moines and rented every copy of Halloween, A Nightmare on Elm Street, and The Exorcist and won't be returning them until after Halloween so no one else can enjoy them.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

I went to the Blockbuster video in Des Moines and rented every copy of Halloween, A Nightmare on Elm Street, and The Exorcist and won't be returning them until after Halloween so no one else can enjoy them.

But I thought those were on the "good" list Sister BIG is compiling!

You didn't leave "It's the Great Humpkin, Charlie Brown" there, did you?

[DamianC]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

I loved the candy coated razor blades! I laughed out loud out of joy.

Luckily Halloween day is not celebrated in Argentina, but then again, fags can get married any day of the year they want now.

If it counts for something, on christmas, I do spend a whole week putting together a huge satan claus doll with help from the local kids and, on the very magical christmas Eve, I set it on fire and display it around the neighbourhood in the roof of my car while explaining out loud that he doesn't exist; that we are feeding our children false idols while overshadowing the true meaning of the holiday. I like to call it the "educative christmas stroll".

Yours in Christ,

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

This year I plan on following Trick-or-Treaters and yelling scriptures in their ears with a bull horn. I also plan on spraying them with my Baptismal super-soaker to get rid of any demons they maybe carrying.

Then I will take away any bags of candy they may have and set them aflame in the name of JESUS.

I will try my best not to hit them with my Bible. But I can't make any promises.

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

I don't know if they will be able to get through the security gates to our place, but if they do, rather than hand out candy, I will give them chick tracts and these:



Not only with they have the love of the Lord in an instant, but minty fresh breath too!

YIC

Mrs Phebe Dewitt.

[handmaiden]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

I thought about handing out little bags of carrots, but that might get them thinking about the Easter Bunny.



Uncertainly Yours,

Handmaiden

[BelieverInGod]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

I thought about handing out little bags of carrots, but that might get them thinking about the Easter Bunny.



Uncertainly Yours,

Handmaiden

Celery sticks? Radishes? Dried prunes?

Well just to warn everyone here, we are going to be putting the lights up the driveway with the dogs chained at the curve. Anyone trick-or-treating at our house will be heading home to change their drawers.

[LordHaveMercy]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

I have rigged quite a bit of high-powered lighting around the house, mostly shining straight at it. I want to brighten up the entire area, as Jesus brightens up the areas He is in. The sign, which says BEST HALLOWEEN CANDY IN THE TOWN will be up across my entire second floor. The idea is that kids will be attracted like moths, and once they pass the kleig-lights, they will not be able to see any of the one-way concertina wire that is strung in multiple layers around the perimeter.

I have tracts at the ready of course, to bring Jesus into their hearts, but I think good old time shouting scripture at the top of my lungs a half inch from their faces gets the job done even better! Plus, the little beggars probably can't even read, with their secular humanist devil loving public education.

With any luck, I can get most of the neighborhood kids in there! Praise!

[Wash O'Hanley]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

Today I saw a guy making a haunted maze in his garage, using pieces of plywood as walls. I called the building inspector to go check it out and sure enough there were a few violations so the stupid guy had to take it all down.

[Nobar King]

Re: What have you done to ruin Halloween?

If I hear "Happy Halloween" one more time before Oct. 31 I think I'm going to lose it. I understand why the unsaved say it on Halloween, they already don't care about their souls which are doomed to hell, but what's the point of saying it two weeks before Halloween? Do you tell your friends "Happy Thanksgiving" two weeks before Thanksgiving? Do you tell your friends "happy birthday" on any day other than their real birthday?

Halloween this year is starting to overwhelm me with bad feelings and my anxiety level has gone up to the point where I'm not even sleeping well. I fear what all this stress is going to do to my heart. I get angry every time a new pumpkin appears on the block or when another neighbor stretches synthetic cobwebs on their bushes.

I can't even go to the store without seeing pallets of candy for sale. When I walk into the Piggly Wiggly and I see all that candy I think about the candy burn and I'm overcome with desire to just light the pile right there inside the store. I know that I wouldn't be very popular if I did that so I just keep my feelings bottled up to the point where I feel like my head is going to explode.