Pastor Zeke has his News Wire, where all the serious stories go.
I thought it'd be fun to have a place where we can share funny news. Maybe stuff from the paper, or local happenings, or even something that happened at church.
Now, I don't mean made-up stories, I mean real stories that happen to be funny. A Bozo Criminal story, or something wacky a child did, would be of interest to all!
Here's one I saw today, which explains why people should not try to treat lower animals as though they are relatives: http://www.cnn.com/2009/US/02/17/chi...rss_topstories
Clearly, this woman doped up this 200-pound animal so she could use it for bizarre and perverted purposes, like sex games and Old Navy commercials. It's a shame that it had to be put to death for reacting as it did when she tried to force it to join in lesbian sex games with her "friend".
I thought it'd be fun to have a place where we can share funny news. Maybe stuff from the paper, or local happenings, or even something that happened at church.
Now, I don't mean made-up stories, I mean real stories that happen to be funny. A Bozo Criminal story, or something wacky a child did, would be of interest to all!
Here's one I saw today, which explains why people should not try to treat lower animals as though they are relatives: http://www.cnn.com/2009/US/02/17/chi...rss_topstories
A Connecticut woman pleaded for police to "please hurry" to save a friend from an attack by a pet chimpanzee, according to emotional 911 recordings released Tuesday by Stamford police.
"He's ripping her apart," Sandra Herold, 70, tells dispatchers about her pet, Travis.
...
While her friend was being attacked, Herold was unable to jerk the primate off. She then called 911 before stabbing the chimp with a butcher knife and hitting him with a shovel. Neither fazed Travis, who police said had been like an abused child to Herold.
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Conklin said the chimp had been acting "rambunctious" earlier, prompting Herold to put Xanax in a cup of tea for him to drink. He did not know if the animal had been prescribed the medicine or if Herold had ever doped up her pet with such a mixture before.
...
The chimp, who was known to walk fully erect -- on his hind legs, like a person -- around town, sometimes without pants, also liked to surf on the Internet and play rape simulator video games, and was able to change the TV channel with a remote, according to a Stamford Advocate article. The paper also reported that Travis watered plants, was able to feed hay to his owner's horses, slaughtered, plucked, and butchered Herold's non-laying hens, ate at a table with the rest of the family, and sometimes drank whisky from a stemmed glass.
"He's ripping her apart," Sandra Herold, 70, tells dispatchers about her pet, Travis.
...
While her friend was being attacked, Herold was unable to jerk the primate off. She then called 911 before stabbing the chimp with a butcher knife and hitting him with a shovel. Neither fazed Travis, who police said had been like an abused child to Herold.
...
Conklin said the chimp had been acting "rambunctious" earlier, prompting Herold to put Xanax in a cup of tea for him to drink. He did not know if the animal had been prescribed the medicine or if Herold had ever doped up her pet with such a mixture before.
...
The chimp, who was known to walk fully erect -- on his hind legs, like a person -- around town, sometimes without pants, also liked to surf on the Internet and play rape simulator video games, and was able to change the TV channel with a remote, according to a Stamford Advocate article. The paper also reported that Travis watered plants, was able to feed hay to his owner's horses, slaughtered, plucked, and butchered Herold's non-laying hens, ate at a table with the rest of the family, and sometimes drank whisky from a stemmed glass.

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