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  • #1

    I got a great idea!

    Last night I was watchin tv and this show come on MSNBC called to catch a predator with Chris Hanson and they were trapping these guys who were coming to a house to get it on with a young gal. A few of them were coming to get it on with a young homer too! Then Chris Hanson has a little chat with them then they leave they get horse collered by the cops outside and get their butts hawled away.

    Well, why couldnt we lure God haters to a place where they think theres a God hatin party goin on? Then we could get them on camera and get them all good and ambarasssed for being heethens and maybe Chris Hanson might come and have his little chat with them. Then when they go to leave Bobby-Joe and a few other True Christians might could snag em and take them to a trailer and duck tape there mouth and start readin to em from the King James Bible 1611 until they beg to get thereselfes baptised and start lovin our lord Jesus Christ right away sos they can get the present called the holy spirit. I found these today all by myself exept I did catch the numbers at servises this morning.

    Acts 2:38 (King James Version)


    38Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

    Acts 10:48 (King James Version)


    48And he commanded them to be baptized in the name of the Lord. Then prayed they him to tarry certain days.


    I dont know what tarry means but it cant be good if you aint baptised.
    GOT DEMONS? WE CAN HELP! THEY'RE EVERYWHERE AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO FIGHT THEM ALONE! JESUS WANTS YOU TO BE RID OF THEM ONCE AND FOR ALL! YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO IT ALONE! LET US HELP YOU RIGHT AWAY!

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  • #2
    Re: I got a great idea!

    I like your thinking, friend. A good strong dose of humiliation in front of Jesus and a national TV audience might be just the thing these God haters need.

    Maybe we could have parishoners stationed outside with supersoakers, ready to do sudden Baptisms too!
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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    • #3
      Re: I got a great idea!

      Originally posted by Emil Sledge View Post
      Last night I was watchin tv and this show come on MSNBC called to catch a predator with Chris Hanson and they were trapping these guys who were coming to a house to get it on with a young gal. A few of them were coming to get it on with a young homer too! Then Chris Hanson has a little chat with them then they leave they get horse collered by the cops outside and get their butts hawled away.

      Well, why couldnt we lure God haters to a place where they think theres a God hatin party goin on? Then we could get them on camera and get them all good and ambarasssed for being heethens and maybe Chris Hanson might come and have his little chat with them. Then when they go to leave Bobby-Joe and a few other True Christians might could snag em and take them to a trailer and duck tape there mouth and start readin to em from the King James Bible 1611 until they beg to get thereselfes baptised and start lovin our lord Jesus Christ right away sos they can get the present called the holy spirit. I found these today all by myself exept I did catch the numbers at servises this morning.

      Acts 2:38 (King James Version)


      38Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

      Acts 10:48 (King James Version)


      48And he commanded them to be baptized in the name of the Lord. Then prayed they him to tarry certain days.


      I dont know what tarry means but it cant be good if you aint baptised.
      I didn't read your post since you're new and you can't spell. But if the Pastor says that what you posted makes sense, I'm all for it.

      I am a bit troubled by your last name though friend. One of our resident nutjobs goes by the first name of Sledge. Do you know him in real life? He'd be tough to forget if you'd ever met him.
      sigpic


      Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



      God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



      Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!

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      • #4
        Re: I got a great idea!

        Originally posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
        I didn't read your post since you're new and you can't spell. But if the Pastor says that what you posted makes sense, I'm all for it.

        I am a bit troubled by your last name though friend. One of our resident nutjobs goes by the first name of Sledge. Do you know him in real life? He'd be tough to forget if you'd ever met him.
        I aint never herd of anyone with the first name Sledge. That wuold be a heck of a first name huh? Musta been a alias or something. Maybe Ill meet him when I come over to Freehold some day. My daddy his name was Vern Sledge and thats the only last name I ever had too.
        GOT DEMONS? WE CAN HELP! THEY'RE EVERYWHERE AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO FIGHT THEM ALONE! JESUS WANTS YOU TO BE RID OF THEM ONCE AND FOR ALL! YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO IT ALONE! LET US HELP YOU RIGHT AWAY!

        Comment

        • #5
          Re: I got a great idea!

          What happened to your forehead Brother Sledge? Looks like a donkey kicked ya?
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          • #6
            Re: I got a great idea!

            I aint really a smart guy and I been warned to spell and write proper here on these good forums so its gonna take me a while to right this all. But I do beleive this brother has a great idea.

            The best thing about this is if anyone be rejecting Christ Almighty in any one of these heathen parties they can be stoned according to the Bible.

            Leviticus 20:27
            A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.

            Now if this aint open season on heathens then I dunno what is.
            Upon the wicked he shall rain snares, fire and brimstone, and an horrible tempest: this shall be the portion of their cup. (Psalm 11:6)

            GOD HATES FAGS
            Romans 1:18-32, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, 1 Timothy 1:8-11, Jude 7, etc
            DEATH PENALTY FOR FAGS

             WHITE AND PROUD

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: I got a great idea!

              Originally posted by Brother Hank View Post
              I aint really a smart guy and I been warned to spell and write proper here on these good forums so its gonna take me a while to right this all. But I do beleive this brother has a great idea.

              The best thing about this is if anyone be rejecting Christ Almighty in any one of these heathen parties they can be stoned according to the Bible.

              Leviticus 20:27
              A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.

              Now if this aint open season on heathens then I dunno what is.
              This is not open season friend; evil secular law. As is mentioned in Romans we must obey secular law. Therefore no atheist stoning until we Christians get the law in order by making those hate mongers evil ideas a capital offense like it should be.

              Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

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              Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

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              • #8
                Re: I got a great idea!

                Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
                This is not open season friend; evil secular law. As is mentioned in Romans we must obey secular law. Therefore no atheist stoning until we Christians get the law in order by making those hate mongers evil ideas a capital offense like it should be.
                Well I be votin for Sister Sarah in the next election for sure!
                Upon the wicked he shall rain snares, fire and brimstone, and an horrible tempest: this shall be the portion of their cup. (Psalm 11:6)

                GOD HATES FAGS
                Romans 1:18-32, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, 1 Timothy 1:8-11, Jude 7, etc
                DEATH PENALTY FOR FAGS

                 WHITE AND PROUD

                Comment

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