Apology for Disturbing the Service on Sunday

[H. Montague Worthington]

I would like to apologize for being late to church on Sunday and arriving covered in gallons of splattered blood. It’s a long story, but let’s just say that there’s one less Mexican family whose red truck is going to break down and keep Godly Christians from getting to church on time.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Apology for Disturbing the Service on Sunday

I would like to apologize for being late to church on Sunday and arriving covered in gallons of splattered blood. It’s a long story, but let’s just say that there’s one less Mexican family whose red truck is going to break down and keep Godly Christians from getting to church on time.

Brother Montague,

While we understand the sinful can understand how the sinful can tax the faithful so the blood stains are quit understandable we of the Security Detail would prefer it if you would refrain from reloading your firearms during service. You have to understand in this Post 911 environment it makes a tad distracted seeing someone with a clear line of sight on our dear Pastor Deacon Fred loading a gun and no one wants us missing a real liberal terrorist. So please keep this in mind in the future Brother Montague and as always it was good seeing you at worship.

BTW I hope your dear wife Doris gets over what ever it is she had last Sunday. She looked white as ghost.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Apology for Disturbing the Service on Sunday

I would like to apologize for being late to church on Sunday and arriving covered in gallons of splattered blood. It’s a long story, but let’s just say that there’s one less Mexican family whose red truck is going to break down and keep Godly Christians from getting to church on time.

I told my husband, Mr. Whitford, that it must be something like that, though I suspected you were just tired of the staff at Ching Hong's Dry Cleaning barely being able to speak American. When I dropped by the next day to pick up my laundry, I knew that I was mistaken. They really do wonderful work though for a bunch of slants. No wonder they're allowed to run a business in Freehold. I do wonder sometimes if they're faking their lack of language skills just to frustrate people trying to witness to them. After all, young Hung was born here, and don't they usually learn to speak properly when that happens?