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  • #16
    Re: Holocaust Jokes

    Q: Why is it the mentally ill don't send Christmas cards?

    A: Because they're too busy on their knees praying.
    Acts 14:2 But the unbelieving Jews stirred up the Gentiles, and made their minds evil affected against the brethren.

    Comment

    • #17
      Re: Holocaust Jokes

      What's the difference between real Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

      It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
      Acts 14:2 But the unbelieving Jews stirred up the Gentiles, and made their minds evil affected against the brethren.

      Comment

      • #18
        Re: Holocaust Jokes

        Originally posted by David Rothstein View Post
        Q: Why is it the mentally ill don't send Christmas cards?

        A: Because they're too busy on their knees praying.
        Q: What do you call someone who prays to a wall?

        A: A Jew
        O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



        God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

        Comment

        • #19
          Re: Holocaust Jokes

          Originally posted by David Rothstein View Post
          What's the difference between real Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

          It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
          I can't believe you would post something like this! Do you have any idea how offensive this joke is to Christians? You should be ashamed.
          "Whether of them twain did the will of his father? They say unto him, The first. Jesus saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That the publicans and the harlots go into the kingdom of God before you. For John came unto you in the way of righteousness, and ye believed him not: but the publicans and the harlots believed him: and ye, when ye had seen it, repented not afterward, that ye might believe him." Matthew 21:31-32

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          Comment

          • #20
            Re: Holocaust Jokes

            Why can't Jesus eat M&M's?

            They keep falling through his hands.
            Acts 14:2 But the unbelieving Jews stirred up the Gentiles, and made their minds evil affected against the brethren.

            Comment

            • #21
              Re: Holocaust Jokes

              I wrote:

              Originally posted by Cardinal Dario Fungi View Post
              Here is one the Pope told me:

              How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon?

              1004.

              4 in the seats and 1000 in the ashtray.
              Then this Enoch fellow writes:

              Originally posted by Brother Enoch View Post
              How many joos can you fit in a Volkswagen?

              2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ashtray!
              Then YOU say:
              Originally posted by Titus Templeton View Post
              Very good one, Brother Enoch!
              I may be old and the Lord may have taken away my bladder control, but I will not let that man jew me out of my joke!
              Peace Be With You,

              Cardinal (Ret.) Dario Fungi

              Comment

              • #22
                Re: Holocaust Jokes

                Originally posted by Cardinal Dario Fungi View Post
                I wrote:

                .
                I may be old and the Lord may have taken away my bladder control, but I will not let that man jew me out of my joke!
                You're surely not serious...?? You're just yidding...right?

                Comment

                • #23
                  Re: Holocaust Jokes

                  Originally posted by David Rothstein View Post
                  Why can't Jesus eat M&M's?

                  They keep falling through his hands.
                  How is this related to the Holocau$t?


                  What's the similarity between a joo and a tire?

                  They both scream when you hit full gas.
                  "And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free."
                  John 8:32

                  Comment

                  • #24
                    Re: Holocaust Jokes

                    Originally posted by Cardinal Dario Fungi View Post
                    I wrote:



                    Then this Enoch fellow writes:



                    Then YOU say:


                    I may be old and the Lord may have taken away my bladder control, but I will not let that man jew me out of my joke!
                    I have better delivery than you. Plus I know how to spell Volkswagen.

                    Comment

                    • #25
                      Re: Holocaust Jokes

                      I am not sure we should be doing this at all. I mean aren't we just helping the Joos and their lies about Hitler and Germany? I am most likely wrong.

                      Comment

                      • #26
                        Re: Holocaust Jokes

                        I think it's probably fine.

                        Q: What do you call the person responsible for the Holocaust?

                        A: A dirty Jew.
                        O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                        God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                        Comment

                        • #27
                          Re: Holocaust Jokes

                          Found these on the internet thingy:


                          My history teacher once asked me if I knew what the holocaust was.
                          Hilarious, was apparently not the correct answer.


                          I recently went to Auschwitz and it was one of the most depressing experiences of my life.
                          No gift shop


                          What’s grey, runs along walls and kills Jews?
                          Gas Pipes.


                          Three Jews walk into a sauna.
                          Gullible cun+s


                          My boss (who is German) had the audacity to tell me there is no ‘I’ in ‘team’.
                          However, he got quite upset when I casually pointed out that there is a ‘U’ in ‘holocaust’…


                          Holocaust, the Musical. Putting the ‘sing’ back into ethnic cleansing.














                          Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are unGodly among them of all their unGodly deeds which they have unGodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which unGodly sinners have spoken against him.

                          Comment

                          • #28
                            Re: Holocaust Jokes

                            On a more serious note, I heard World War II and the holocaust were actually planned and instigated by Zionists to lead to the formation of Israel when Germany was defeated. They sacrificed 6 million of their own, and 60 million from other nations (mostly Christians, except for the japs) to bring about the birth (rebirth) of Israel. Anyone have any more on this?

                            Comment

                            • #29
                              Re: Holocaust Jokes

                              Hey come on now! Stop making holocaust jokes, they are so hurtful Anne Frankly I won't stand for it.


                              Who Will Jesus Damn?

                              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                              Comment

                              • #30
                                Re: Holocaust Jokes

                                Found 1 more I like:



                                Why don't Jews eat pussy?

                                Their noses get in the way.






                                (yeah, not holcausty enough, hire a jew lawyer and sue me)
                                Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are unGodly among them of all their unGodly deeds which they have unGodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which unGodly sinners have spoken against him.

                                Comment

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