[wait_what]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

What's the difference between a truckload of dead joos and a truckload of bowling balls?










You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.







So one day a 100 seat bus went over a cliff while engulfed in flames with 98 joos on board. What did Hitler say?












That was a waste of a perfectly good bus.

[Titus Templeton]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

I am writing a book at the moment about holocaust jokes.
I want to present this experimental kind of holocaust joke. I hope you like it:

A young jewish girl escapes from Auschwitz, and she runs all the way to Paris in France. She knocks on a house and a man opens it. She says:" Whats your name?" and the man answers:" My name is Jean-Baptiste Grenouille, i create parfums." She asks him if she can hide in his house and he says:" Your welcome!"

[Virginia Day Templeton]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

What is the difference between a bar of soap and a Jew?
A bar of soap lasts longer than one shower.

There should be no difference.

[Titus Templeton]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Another one by me:

Hitler visits auschwitz and meets his favorite scientist Dr.Mengele.
They walk threw the concentration camp to Dr.Mengeles special section for twins and disabled people. Hitler sees a girl and asks her name. The girl says shes Anne Frank. Hitler asks her: " I have created the Autobahn and the kindergarten, made the germans proud of themselfes and created modern rockets. what did you have done in your life young girl?"

Anne Frank says:"A diary"

[Immaculate Kiwi]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Damn, rather than start a new thread about the mini Japanese holocaust, Ill quickly throw this 'pearler' into it....

Why did the Japanese tsunami travel so far inland?

C'mon, everyone knows water travels further down slopes!

[BelieverInGod]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

This Joke is made by me:


A jew and a man with down syndrome walking threw the concentration camp.
The man with down syndrome asks the jew:" Why are you here?"
"Because im a jew" says the jew, " and why are you here?" the jew asks back. The down syndrome says: "Because i am retardet"

+1

That's the biggest joke of all, isn't it. That the Jews seem to think that they were the only ones treated badly. I don't see any other group freaking and crying about the Holocaust.

[Titus Templeton]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

This Joke is made by me:


A jew and a man with down syndrome walking threw the concentration camp.
The man with down syndrome asks the jew:" Why are you here?"
"Because im a jew" says the jew, " and why are you here?" the jew asks back. The down syndrome says: "Because i am retardet"

[Cursed]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

The holocaust is funny, just admit it.

There's something hilarious about a bunch of shaved (get it? they're normally so hairy) venomous jews dying in a poison (ironic yet again) shower (something they avoided like the plague in life, yet another irony) yelling, "Oy vey!"

If you can't see it, you don't have a developed sense of humor. Not our fault that you're a stick in the mud, stop whining about it you baby! You should enjoy the obviously humorous situations GOD provides us with for laughter, it's good for the soul. Praise God!

[Atheist4life]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

And to Mr. Rodemer, I am here to try and understand you all. Its difficult and I don't need to agree, but I'd like to know what your point of view is. This site seems to be where you all show your real opinions, rather than what I see on tv or in real life.

[Atheist4life]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Well there are still Jewish around because of all of those who fled to other countries in terror. I think you became confused by my hyperbolic statement that the entire race was destroyed, it was to give more of an impact and describe the gravity of the mass murder of 5.9 million people of the same race. And to say I was off topic, I suppose. Though I believe that the most suitable place to point out what I see as a horrific set of beliefs would be this thread that mocks genocide.
And we do have tail bones, the end of the spine continues and forms the coccyx. They are a vestigial piece of spine. Many children are also born with deformities like tails. But that is another can of worms in which the final say will never be agreed upon by both sides of the spectrum of beliefs.
Monkeys still exist because there would be no reason for all monkeys to die just because a few became more advanced. If there were two average people and one became rich and successful, why would the other instantaneously die?
This is not a debate, I simply wish to respond to your questions in a logical way so that I wont get thrown under the bus for spelling errors and being "off topic". I appreciate your opinions of me seeing as you did not receive an infraction for sarcasm, which obviously means you were being sincere. Thank you very much for legitimately reading my post, I am happy to answer any other questions you may have for me. I would just like to follow the rules here and perhaps better understand the minds of the majority of this site.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Since your confused, summary: you can be evil and mean and spiteful, but go to heaven because you go to church and can memorize a book. You can be kind, sweet, caring, and helpful but your going to hell because you don't believe the words written in a book by humans.

And as I've already explained, anyone who accepts Jesus and stops sinning entirely and forever can go to Heaven. Anyone else, nice or not, gets to spend eternity being burned alive in God's Lake of Fire.

Since you don't believe the Bible is God's Word, and you don't believe Heaven exists, I really don't understand the point of your joining a Christian church's discussion forum.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Oh, thats right, I do apologize for the overall lack of correct punctuation about my grammar. I forgot that qualifies me as a retard, and people with mental disabilities are all doomed right? Thats what you stated anyway.
As for the run on, there was just too many things to talk about your silly requirements for getting into heaven. You also pointed out some other errors in my speech, I just don't think its that important, it's really more about the message. Since your confused, summary: you can be evil and mean and spiteful, but go to heaven because you go to church and can memorize a book. You can be kind, sweet, caring, and helpful but your going to hell because you don't believe the words written in a book by humans. I was simply summarizing all that I've read on this site by people like you.
My point: your requirements are ridiculous, and heaven is not filled with people I would like to be around. Just a statement.
You also brought up that you don't want me to go to hell, I highly doubt that sir. I'm quite sure you do, I'm pro-choice, atheist, pro-gay marriage, and a Democrat.
And please keep in mind this is not an argument site, so please don't try and argue with me, its against the rules. My infraction was for the horrible grammar and errors, not for it's content Oh yes, I am sure there are plenty of errors in this as well, but lets be adults and not worry about them alright?

I hope you enjoy how you spend your life, you only get one.

Hi friend, that was one long off topic whine! Pretty imnpressive.

But lets get back on topic. You seem to have some powerful insights here, ones that have made me ponder everything God has done.
Tell me, if all the joos were baked or gassed, why ae they still around? Now I ask that because evolutionists claim we came from monkees. If we did, why don't we have tails and why are there still monkees areound. I sure hope you can explain this to me as you do seem like an on the ball, sharp as a tack, go getter.

[Atheist4life]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Oh, thats right, I do apologize for the overall lack of correct punctuation about my grammar. I forgot that qualifies me as a retard, and people with mental disabilities are all doomed right? Thats what you stated anyway.
As for the run on, there was just too many things to talk about your silly requirements for getting into heaven. You also pointed out some other errors in my speech, I just don't think its that important, it's really more about the message. Since your confused, summary: you can be evil and mean and spiteful, but go to heaven because you go to church and can memorize a book. You can be kind, sweet, caring, and helpful but your going to hell because you don't believe the words written in a book by humans. I was simply summarizing all that I've read on this site by people like you.
My point: your requirements are ridiculous, and heaven is not filled with people I would like to be around. Just a statement.
You also brought up that you don't want me to go to hell, I highly doubt that sir. I'm quite sure you do, I'm pro-choice, atheist, pro-gay marriage, and a Democrat.
And please keep in mind this is not an argument site, so please don't try and argue with me, its against the rules. My infraction was for the horrible grammar and errors, not for it's content Oh yes, I am sure there are plenty of errors in this as well, but lets be adults and not worry about them alright?

I hope you enjoy how you spend your life, you only get one.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

and you all wonder why people think your crazy, making jokes about an entire race of people getting murdered for having different beliefs.

If the entire Jewish race were exterminated, why are there more Jews now than before the "holycaust"?

if your a great person, you have helped thousands, you have never hurt anyone in your life and you care deeply for your friends and family but your atheist, your going to hell because your scum.

No, you're ("your" is possessive, dimwit) going to Hell because you deny Jesus, just like the Jews.

If you hate and despise most of the world because they thinking differently; you for the deaths of anyone with different beliefs, you applaud when hitler murders people because they were Jewish (and you dont wanna risk your 'ride to heaven' by killing them yourself), and you think even if you do something wrong if you pray its fine, and that your spiteful existence is the prime material for 'heaven' because you go to church to pray to god for your petty problems, give all your money to support your church and nothing to help those whose lives have been ruined by a natural disaster, and you can memorize a book.

Was there an end to that run-on? I couldn't find it.

However, the only people who go to Heaven are True Christians™, who follow the WHOLE Bible. Hypocrites like Billy Graham will have their place in God's Lake of Fire.

If your god is so petty he takes attendance and condemns anyone who doesnt completely support and love and obey him, then i dont want to go to hell.

I don't want you to go to Hell, either. So why don't you start obeying God?

anyone like to tell me how im wrong? oh wait, i spoke the truth so you cant, ive only talked about what you all have said yourselfs and what you actually believe so you cant. guess there is no argument is there.

You're wrong because you are incapable of composing a coherent sentence, much less an argument. I don't even know what your point is supposed to be. Are you retarded, by any chance?

That would explain why you deny God.

[Atheist4life]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

and you all wonder why people think your crazy, making jokes about an entire race of people getting murdered for having different beliefs. in what why does this make you the superior race, i just want to know why you all think this makes you good people. from what ive seen all you do is support murder and hate, alittle hypocritical. from your actions ive determined this: if your a great person, you have helped thousands, you have never hurt anyone in your life and you care deeply for your friends and family but your atheist, your going to hell because your scum. If you hate and despise most of the world because they thinking differently; you for the deaths of anyone with different beliefs, you applaud when hitler murders people because they were Jewish (and you dont wanna risk your 'ride to heaven' by killing them yourself), and you think even if you do something wrong if you pray its fine, and that your spiteful existence is the prime material for 'heaven' because you go to church to pray to god for your petty problems, give all your money to support your church and nothing to help those whose lives have been ruined by a natural disaster, and you can memorize a book. If your god is so petty he takes attendance and condemns anyone who doesnt completely support and love and obey him, then i dont want to go to hell. anyone like to tell me how im wrong? oh wait, i spoke the truth so you cant, ive only talked about what you all have said yourselfs and what you actually believe so you cant. guess there is no argument is there.
Oh, this is to all of you big members of this site, if you just joined and are already planning on never clicking through this pile of hatefilled text of a website because you believe in a higher power and thats it, good for you. i have no issue with you and your not a target of my point. Well im about to get banned so i'll see you all in 'hell' i suppose.