X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • Cranky Old Man
    Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
    You kids get off his lawn!
     
    • Jan 2010
    • 22378

    #31
    Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

    Originally posted by josh_cjr View Post
    Do you know exactly how 'god' did it? did 'he' just say "let there be light"
    Just read Encyclopædia Britannica, it contains everything you will ever need.
    Last edited by Cranky Old Man; 04-22-2011, 06:09 PM.
    5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
    To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
    James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

    Comment

    • Pastor Isaac Peters
      Senior Pastor
      Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
      Always Biblically correct
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 10639

      #32
      Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

      My favorite activity on Dawkins' green earth is to persecute Christians. When not busy persecuting Christians, I like to have bareback sex with strangers at highway rest stops. You're not supposed to judge me, but you still have to pay taxes to buy my HIV medications.
      This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

      Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

      sigpic

      Comment

      • WinnerNotSinner
        Friendliest Fellow in all of Freehold
        True Christian™
        • Jun 2010
        • 951

        #33
        Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

        god creating everything in 7 days is not logical!!

        What is more logical is everything was made out of nothing and after a million billion years we all evolved from monkeys. We know this because we dug up something in the ground which looked really really old so it must be true and also charles darwin said it, who is obviously greater than god. I believe this even though it is contradicted by scripture because I can't think for myself.

        oh also you people are faggits and are going to hell!!!!!!!!!!!11

        ---

        I think I got it pretty spot on.
        6
        A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
        "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

        Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
        If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

        GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

        Comment

        • Barry
          Forum Member
          Forum Member
          • Nov 2010
          • 259

          #34
          Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

          I don't want to be a party pooper and for you people to think I do not have a sense of humour. Honestly, I can laugh at a joke, just the same as the next guy. But, I can't handle this thread at all. I know you are all having fun and I know you don't mean any of it. You are trying to be outrageous just for the hell of it and exploring a darker side to you psyche.

          But even in jest such nonsense scares me. Did you ever stop to consider what might happen, if God came into this thread half way through and missed the first post? Remember he can be a little vindictive at times and has a jellous temper. If I were you, just to be on the safe side, I might feel obliged to put a disclaimer at the foot of each post on this thread.

          Just saying.
          The Lord is my shepherd.

          Comment

          • Jack O'fagan
            With faith as immovable as the Earth
            True Christian™
            • Feb 2011
            • 4836

            #35
            Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

            Well I'm gay and proud! I have had several hundred men in the past, all one night stands. I am now with my partner Dave and we have brought four children and are a totally happy family. There is no way that they will grow up with problems just because all the other kids call them names and beat the shit out of them daily. If me and Dave want to snog during parents evening that's our right. The problem is with you. There is no god.

            Anyway Jesus was all about love so even if we were doing something wrong then surely he would forgive us.

            GET A LIFE!

            Jack O'Faggot
            Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.

            sigpic

            I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.

            Comment

            • BelieverInGod
              Fourm Member
              Forum Member
              • Feb 2010
              • 9269

              #36
              Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

              JESUS WAS GAY!
              MOSES WAS GAY!
              PETER WAS GAY!
              PAUL WAS GAY!
              KING JAMES WAS GAY!
              SHAKESPEARE WAS GAY!
              HITLER WAS GAYOops I mean straight, we don't want him on our team.

              EVERYONE IN HISTORY THAT HAD ANY SIGNIFICANCE WHATSOEVER WAS GAY! IF YOU DON'T AGREE YOU'RE AN INTOLERANT REDNECK HOMOPHOBE!
              Drama queen

              Comment

              • wait_what
                Forum Member
                Forum Member
                • Mar 2011
                • 592

                #37
                Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                So, I don't need to read scripture in order to have a frame of reference for our discussion. But I am going to hold you accountable to the teachings of men that are unfounded and prideful at best. Then when you prove me wrong I will cast unfounded insults at you on your website that I wandered into uninvited.

                After all of that, I am going to go volunteer at my local drive through abortion clinic hoping a cute teen girl comes in so I can prime the pump before sucking out a baby that I can sell at the asian market. Afterwards I will go shoot mushrooms into my bloodstream so that I can get really messed up. While I am tripping out, I am pretty sure I will allow any one and anything to have its way with me.

                I will write my name with my urine on my dear sweet grandmother's grave because she never meant anything to anyone as I surely don't either.
                The best way to turn a dishwasher into a snowblower. . . . .
                Give her a shovel.
                Proverbs 5:19 A husband's commandment! And wives must comply.
                19Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.

                Comment

                • Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson
                  Pastor of Praise and Worship
                  A True Christian™ Straight Shooter
                  True Christian™
                  • Jul 2009
                  • 3890

                  #38
                  Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                  Aren't you all supposed to be nice to everyone, you stupid piffleing buttholes?

                  You are supposed to be nice and sit there while I smack you around and cherrypick a few verses! You should not talk back! I have my freedoms of speech, which means I can say anything, anytime and anywhere I want to.

                  If you delete my art of the pictures of zombies eating Jesus or piss christ, that's censorship!!
                  Praise and worship with Pastor Will. Services at 9 a.m., 11 a.m. and 6 p.m.


                  Contact me. pastorwillsampson at gmail.com

                  Comment

                  • Rev. M. Rodimer
                    Honorary True Christian™
                    Forum Member
                    • May 2008
                    • 13996

                    #39
                    Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                    Originally posted by Billy Bob Jenkins View Post
                    (In this thread)
                    Thanks, Brother! I was thinking it was some sort of a vocational school where people learn to role-play or something.
                    Originally posted by josh_cjr View Post
                    Do you know exactly how 'god' did it? did 'he' just say "let there be light"
                    Can you believe that's what the Bible says?? These silly Christians make fun of atheists for believing that "everything came from nothing", and then they turn around and say "everything came from God, who conveniently always existed and just sat around bored until he decided to make the universe"!

                    How ridiculous is that? Of COURSE everything came from nothing! Where else would it come from?
                    Originally posted by Pastor Isaac Peters View Post
                    My favorite activity on Dawkins' green earth is to persecute Christians. When not busy persecuting Christians, I like to have bareback sex with strangers at highway rest stops. You're not supposed to judge me, but you still have to pay taxes to buy my HIV medications.


                    Um . . . I thought you looked familiar . . .

                    Bible boring? Nonsense!
                    Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                    You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                    Comment

                    • The Bright Beast
                      Forum Member
                      Forum Member
                      • Apr 2011
                      • 86

                      #40
                      Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                      Hail Satan! Let's go and vote for Barack Obama and then have sex outside of marriage!
                      Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

                      Comment

                      • Jack O'fagan
                        With faith as immovable as the Earth
                        True Christian™
                        • Feb 2011
                        • 4836

                        #41
                        Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                        You Christians believe in God even though,

                        Nobody has ever seen Him,
                        He cannot be detected,
                        You cannot prove he exist,
                        He is just very convenient for your view of creation. You have no evidence so have to fall back on 'faith' and you just know He must be up there somewhere.

                        Why doesn't the Universe expand faster? Oh, that's easy, it's 'dark matter',
                        OK, so
                        Nobody has ever seen it,
                        It cannot be detected,
                        We cannot prove it exists,
                        But it is very convenient for our view of creation. We have no evidence but we have 'faith' that it must be up there somewhere.



                        Jack
                        Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.

                        sigpic

                        I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.

                        Comment

                        • BelieverInGod
                          Fourm Member
                          Forum Member
                          • Feb 2010
                          • 9269

                          #42
                          Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                          Originally posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson View Post
                          Aren't you all supposed to be nice to everyone, you stupid piffleing buttholes?

                          You are supposed to be nice and sit there while I smack you around and cherrypick a few verses! You should not talk back! I have my freedoms of speech, which means I can say anything, anytime and anywhere I want to.

                          If you delete my art of the pictures of zombies eating Jesus or piss christ, that's censorship!!
                          [off topic]
                          Amen Pastor.

                          They seem to think we should be like the Amish, who do take their abuse. Then they get really upset because we stand up for ourselves.

                          I'm sure they're also the same type of person who tortures small dogs just because they can.

                          [back on topic]
                          Drama queen

                          Comment

                          • PetitionLady
                            Hates Obama. Really Hates Obama. Actually, REALLY REALLY REALLY Hates Obama.
                            Forum Member
                            • Nov 2010
                            • 883

                            #43
                            Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                            Originally posted by Pastor Isaac Peters View Post
                            My favorite activity on Dawkins' green earth is to persecute Christians. When not busy persecuting Christians, I like to have bareback sex with strangers at highway rest stops. You're not supposed to judge me, but you still have to pay taxes to buy my HIV medications.
                            Reality, reality!
                            But whosoever shall deny me before men,
                            him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven.
                            ~Matt. 10:33

                            ~~~~~~~
                            Theme song in hell: "I Did it My Way"

                            Comment

                            • Born Again Bob
                              True Christian™
                              True Christian™
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 2318

                              #44
                              Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                              Hey, y'all,

                              What's MOST SUPER IMPORTANT to ME is that everybody love everybody else!!! If you wanna bee BFFs (best friends forever) e-mail me at unicornsR4real@angelfire.com! Nooooooooooooooo grumps!


                              Laterz,
                              bab

                              Comment

                              • Wheatley
                                Confirmed Enemy of God
                                • Apr 2011
                                • 14

                                #45
                                Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists!

                                ITT: We pretend to be our skewed thoughts of athiests!

                                Comment

                                Working...