Seeking advice

[Procyon]

Hi

I have a 15 year old daughter who I am concerned may be losing her faith for all the usual reasons (media, peer pressure, etc). She has also had a boyfriend for a few months now. He four years older than she is but I was not worried because he seemed like a good christian boy to me. But now I am not so sure. Lately he has come to our home looking sloppy and has not been to church for some weeks. I am also concerned that my daughter may be being pressured into becoming sexually active with him.

I am lost and unsure what to do. I need help.

[Bob4God]

Re: Seeking advice

Well the answer is pretty simple. Break off all her friendships and don't let her see her boyfriend anymore!

I suggest sending her to a Landover Bible camp where she'll meet a new crop of friends and bet set on fire for the LORD!

[godsdrummer]

Re: Seeking advice

I wouldn't make her break off contact. That would only make her rebel more, in all honesty. My parents are going through the same thing with my sister. Minus the boy issue. Sit down and have a talk with her, and discuss it all with her. Have a Bible handy, of course.

Then have a talk with the boyfriend, and explain to him that his appearance isn't proper and explain to him why he needs his butt back in chruch.

[Procyon]

Re: Seeking advice

I wouldn't make her break off contact. That would only make her rebel more, in all honesty. My parents are going through the same thing with my sister. Minus the boy issue. Sit down and have a talk with her, and discuss it all with her. Have a Bible handy, of course.

Then have a talk with the boyfriend, and explain to him that his appearance isn't proper and explain to him why he needs his butt back in chruch.

This sounds much like what I was thinking.

I like her boyfriend. I think he is a good person, a good Christian, and will make a good husband for her someday. But there are just some things about him that make me uneasy but I don't know if that's just me being old fashioned or there being a legitimate problem.

I want her to have fun and experience life to it's fullest, but at the same time I want her to be safe and not compromise who she is as an individual.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Seeking advice

Young men of a certain age and disposition may have a tendency towards less than careful dress - to my mind this indicates a mind beset with iniquitous thoughts. You know the sort - dirty shoes = dirty mind; long hair = drugs.

I would ask the chaperone if she has seen or heard anything untoward.

[David Goldman]

Re: Seeking advice

But there are just some things about him that make me uneasy but I don't know if that's just me being old fashioned or there being a legitimate problem.

I want her to have fun and experience life to it's fullest, but at the same time I want her to be safe and not compromise who she is as an individual.

Go with your gut feeling -- God gave us intuition for a reason. And 15 is probably a bit too young to "experience life to it's fullest". I suspect her 19 year old boyfriend is ready for some things that she is not, and that tension is what you are sensing.

The best thing you can do it to NOT set them up for failure. If you won't break off her contact with him, then insist on a chaperon at all times. Because if you allow them the means and opportunity to sin, and they do sin, then you are just as responsible (if not more so) for it.

Remember she is God's daughter too, and she is just on loan to you. If you set her up for failure, then you'll have to answer to God about why you allowed something bad to happen to the daughter whom he trusted you to protect.

[Oakland "Reb" Griner]

Re: Seeking advice

Hi

I have a 15 year old daughter who I am concerned may be losing her faith for all the usual reasons (media, peer pressure, etc). She has also had a boyfriend for a few months now. He four years older than she is but I was not worried because he seemed like a good christian boy to me. But now I am not so sure. Lately he has come to our home looking sloppy and has not been to church for some weeks. I am also concerned that my daughter may be being pressured into becoming sexually active with him.

I am lost and unsure what to do. I need help.

Infibulation !!!!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Seeking advice

Hi

I have a 15 year old daughter who I am concerned may be losing her faith for all the usual reasons (media, peer pressure, etc). She has also had a boyfriend for a few months now. He four years older than she is but I was not worried because he seemed like a good christian boy to me. But now I am not so sure. Lately he has come to our home looking sloppy and has not been to church for some weeks. I am also concerned that my daughter may be being pressured into becoming sexually active with him.

I am lost and unsure what to do. I need help.

What kind of a father are you!? Don't you read the Bible?

YOU are in charge of your children. YOU decide who she sees, when she attends Church, and if she leaves the house. Are you a limp-wristed liberal, pal?

1 Corinthians 11:3
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Please make a thread of your own in the "introduction" section of the forum, and tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.