[Ixi]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

Because that's the wrong way to do it. What you do is rip out the pages and use them as toilet paper first. Anything else would be wasteful.

Thats acually not a bad idea, I'll use all the Jesus pages to wipe my crap.

[Ixi]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

I cried for a good hour after reading these replies. My husband, Mr. Whitford, tried everything he could to comfort me but in the end it took a good couple of smacks to the face to snap me out of it (thank you, sir) but I'm still horrified that people could treat THE WORD OF GOD like this! I know that none of you care the least about your own immortal souls, but don't you care about the souls of the people who could have been saved by the Bibles you've desecrated?
Even as I ask that, I know what the answer is. You want as many sinners burning beside you as possible. But let me tell you this - you will be so busy screaming and gnashing your teeth for eternity that you won't have time to get bored and lonely. So please don't try to hard to drag others down with you. Thank you.

You got to be kidding, how pathetic are you people?

[Ixi]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

You may feel free to flush all the Harry Potter books down the toilet that you can lay your hands on. Do the same with all of the pornographic chink manga you stimulate yourself with too.

The Holy Bible is the Literal Word of God, not some feminazi tract on the elimination of Mankind. No one will ever raise the least objection to you flushing, burning, or wiping your large bum with any of those others, but you should know this: Mistreating the Holy KJV1611 Bible in any way is blasphemy, pure and simple.

And isn't it blasphemy to mistreat pagans and Wiccans the way you do? Why should we treat a BOOK with respect when you don't even treat us with respect? We don't respect you or your BOOK because of the way you treat us.

[Unsaved and Loving It]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

This is God's favorite forum, Icky. We cannot risk offending our Lord by granting special rights to every harlot, witch or homer who staggers in here.

You don't seem to be too harsh when it comes to using infractions and suspensions though. If you were, I'd be down and out in seconds

it might block your pipes

Burn it, and flush the ashes. It's called Logistics!

Because that's the wrong way to do it. What you do is rip out the pages and use them as toilet paper first. Anything else would be wasteful.

Holy Carp.

Do the same with all of the pornographic chink manga you stimulate yourself with too.

Psh. You been living under a rock? It's all digital now. In the space where one used to be able to keep a porn magazine, one can store enough hard drives to download thousands of porn movies. Optimization, my friend. It's a handy thing.

No one will ever raise the least objection to you flushing, burning, or wiping your large bum with any of those others, but you should know this: Mistreating the Holy KJV1611 Bible in any way is blasphemy, pure and simple.

Ask hundreds thousands millions of horny sexless teenagers who use google to look up porn, and they'd be tellin' ye a different story. I've had to listen to the rants of noobs who had content restrictions put on Google Images so they can't look up their porn so many times, I'm now pretty much an expert on the damn subject.

You got to be kidding, how pathetic are you people?

Considering they worship a man that's been dead and rotting in the earth for the past 2000 years, and bow before a few stacks of paper, ya, that's gotta give you some idea.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

I would recommend to our pastors that this thread be removed and some of these deliberately profane posters banned from the board. They've already made Sister Mary Maria break out into tears, earning some further painful discipline from her husband, Mr. Whitford. It's not her fault, but well within Mr. Whitford's right as Lord of the household. It's really a shame, and I hope the heathens on this board are happy that they directly contributed to the beat, er, stern disciplinary measures against a fine, Godly, innocent, churchgoing True Christian™. At least this time it didn't happen in the church parking lot in front of half the congregation.

What I worry about is children seeing the outrageously sinful blasphemy on this site, especially on this thread, which should be a friendly forum for the healthy moral education of our young people. These poor young people shouldn't be subjected to the foul language, incitement to sin, wonton disregard for God's word, and Satan's siren call on an otherwise Godly church forum. Please, won't someone think of the children???!??! (I mean BESIDES you, Father Lester).

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

You don't seem to be too harsh when it comes to using infractions and suspensions though. If you were, I'd be down and out in seconds

We truly aspire to be longsuffering, as Jesus requires of us. This is not to say, however, that we will take your abuse forever: we, like Jesus, have our limits! Do not test our patience, as our fuse is almost as short as God's!

Psh. You been living under a rock? It's all digital now. In the space where one used to be able to keep a porn magazine, one can store enough hard drives to download thousands of porn movies. Optimization, my friend. It's a handy thing.

What has optimization ever done that hasn't damned millions of souls to hell? These so-called "benefits" that you speak of are of no meaning in the bigger scheme of things. They cause people to roast forever, and that is why the so-called "digital age" we live in is so great? Yikes

Ask hundreds thousands millions of horny sexless teenagers who use google to look up porn, and they'd be tellin' ye a different story. I've had to listen to the rants of noobs who had content restrictions put on Google Images so they can't look up their porn so many times, I'm now pretty much an expert on the damn subject.

You, an expert on pornography and other sexual perversions? I'm shocked

Considering they worship a man that's been dead and rotting in the earth for the past 2000 years, and bow before a few stacks of paper, ya, that's gotta give you some idea.

Friend you truly have no concept of what True Christianity is about, do you? We worship a LIVING God, which separates us from the other damned hordes who worship dead or imaginary "gods". The Living Word of Christ is with us today, and one day in the very, very near future, Jesus will return to take us Home with Him! Glory!

[Unsaved and Loving It]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

Do not test our patience, as our fuse is almost as short as God's!

Comparing ourselves to God, are we? *sniffs the air* Mmm... I smell sins toiling in your soul. Jesus has gotta fight harder!

What has optimization ever done that hasn't damned millions of souls to hell?

If I were to see things from your perspective, then what about putting the KJV1611 into digital format? It's optimized, so that people can read their favourite scriptures whilst surfing the interwebs!

You, an expert on pornography and other sexual perversions? I'm shocked

Oh, you have no idea.

Friend you truly have no concept of what True Christianity is about, do you? We worship a LIVING God, which separates us from the other damned hordes who worship dead or imaginary "gods". The Living Word of Christ is with us today, and one day in the very, very near future, Jesus will return to take us Home with Him! Glory!

Well, I look forward to the day when he comes down to Earth. It'll be like Mars Attacks! Only with demons.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

If I were to see things from your perspective, then what about putting the KJV1611 into digital format? It's optimized, so that people can read their favourite scriptures whilst surfing the interwebs!

It is, google KJV1611.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

You got to be kidding, how pathetic are you people?

Personally, I thought Sister Maria's reaction was admirably restrained, considering the circumstances. Of course, as a Godly man, it would be rather undignified for me to start weeping like some kind of a woman, so instead I just spent about fifteen minutes rocking silently back and forth in shock when I saw some of these posts. I may also have soiled myself, it's hard to be sure sometimes.

And isn't it blasphemy to mistreat pagans and Wiccans the way you do?

In a word, no.

Why should we treat a BOOK with respect when you don't even treat us with respect?

Because God wants us to treat His Word with respect, and wants us to kill you. Can you see the difference?

We don't respect you or your BOOK because of the way you treat us.

No, you don't respect us or God's Book because you punk-ass kids don't respect anything or anyone. With the possible exceptions of your meth dealer, Silverbunny Ravenfluff, Richard Ramirez, and Barack Obama.

[Ali]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

If you avoid crying where is the fun of it??

At least there shall be some weeping and sighing to create an healthy atmosphere for your 'discipline' sessions..

[Homertard]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?



But really, you should talk to your husband. I've never once hit my Gf. What do you do to your husband to upset him?

[Father Thomas Martin]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

I advise husbands to love their wives and treat them with respect and dignity...And to never, ever, EVER, BEAT THEM!

[Homertard]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

Yeah, Women beaters = ***holes.

[Talitha]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

I advise husbands to love their wives and treat them with respect and dignity...And to never, ever, EVER, BEAT THEM!

What would a Catlicking Priest know about Women anyway?

My husband used to beat me because as a True Christian™ he loved and respected me.

[Father Thomas Martin]

Re: Should I avoid crying when my husband disciplines me?

My husband used to beat me because as a True Christian™ he loved and respected me.

But he stopped, because a true Christian would know it is wrong.

And by the way, I feel honored that you should put my initials by True Christian™...maybe you don't hate me so much after all...