[Brother Phil (Quarantined)]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

Well, I hope you don't think my precious kitties are going to burn in hell. I've worked ever so hard to make sure they are proper christian kitties. I've worked hard on keeping them away from anything satanic!

How can cats be Christian? ANd how can this crazy church condone the keeping of cats... i mean in Ancient egypt Cats were the guardians of the Underworld... THat associates them with hell and i cannot believe that this church is ok with cats.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

How can cats be Christian? ANd how can this crazy church condone the keeping of cats... i mean in Ancient egypt Cats were the guardians of the Underworld... THat associates them with hell and i cannot believe that this church is ok with cats.

To the best of my knowledge (and it is extensive indeed ), kitties cannot go to heaven. I mean, just look at all of their evil uses -- the slang that has been adopted about them, their association with the wicked witches, the evil slitted eyes, etc. Just LOOKING at them, one can feel the evil (just like when one gazes at two people in love who would give their lives for each other, then finding out that they are GAY).

[Brother Phil (Quarantined)]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

To the best of my knowledge (and it is extensive indeed ), kitties cannot go to heaven. I mean, just look at all of their evil uses -- the slang that has been adopted about them, their association with the wicked witches, the evil slitted eyes, etc. Just LOOKING at them, one can feel the evil (just like when one gazes at two people in love who would give their lives for each other, then finding out that they are GAY).

Wait but if you believe that God Speciffically created Cats they why wouldnt they go to heaven. THey cannot choose between Christianity or any other religion. THe bible says that When the rapture happens all children under a certian age will be raptured regardless of religion because they have not had enough time to Accept Jesus, and because God is a merciful god he takes them to heaven too. Why wouldnt he take cats... he created them and they do not have the capability to choose Jesus or not

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

Wait but if you believe that God Speciffically created Cats they why wouldnt they go to heaven. THey cannot choose between Christianity or any other religion. THe bible says that When the rapture happens all children under a certian age will be raptured regardless of religion because they have not had enough time to Accept Jesus, and because God is a merciful god he takes them to heaven too. Why wouldnt he take cats... he created them and they do not have the capability to choose Jesus or not

Animals don't have souls so they don't go to heaven. It's still an open question about whether women have souls and go to heaven.

[Brother Phil (Quarantined)]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

Animals don't have souls so they don't go to heaven. It's still an open question about whether women have souls and go to heaven.

Why do animals not have souls? Ok Women have Souls and go to heaven just as frequently as men do! You are a sexist pig! If women were so unnecessary why are there women on earth? Females of any species are necessary for the survival of that species. If anything women are a more integral part of offspring than men are. Especially if you believe in this creationism bullshit, why didn't God make it so that men could reproduce by themselves (bees can do it its called parthenogenesis)

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

Why do animals not have souls? Ok Women have Souls and go to heaven just as frequently as men do! You are a sexist pig! If women were so unnecessary why are there women on earth? Females of any species are necessary for the survival of that species. If anything women are a more integral part of offspring than men are. Especially if you believe in this creationism bullshit, why didn't God make it so that men could reproduce by themselves (bees can do it its called parthenogenesis)

You must be a girl, "brother".

[Brother Phil (Quarantined)]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

You must be a girl, "brother".

Wow more creationist bullshit! Great! Y’all really did your research. Did you not know that the Bible was altered to remove women of equal status from it?

Of course you chauvinist bastards think that Women don’t have should that feeds your superiority complex.

[SUV]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

...Women don’t have should that feeds your superiority complex.

I'm not sure just what this means, but I sure Hope that whatever it is we Ladies need to "feed" isn't hungrier than Pastor Pistle when he comes back from an all-weekend Promise Weepers meeting

[Brother Phil (Quarantined)]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

I'm not sure just what this means, but I sure Hope that whatever it is we Ladies need to "feed" isn't hungrier than Pastor Pistle when he comes back from an all-weekend Promise Weepers meeting

No that is not what I meant. I was saying that they were such chauvinist bastards that they want to think that women are inferior and that they have no souls. That idea feeds their chauvinist superiority complex.

How is it that God can love everyone in the world reguardless of religion and yet he cannot love women?

[SUV]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

How is it that God can love everyone in the world reguardless of religion and yet he cannot love women?

Oh my, Brother, God does not Love everyone in the world! He only Loves we True Christian ™ Congeregants here at Landover Baptist Church - where JESUS says our Sermons are "finger-lickin'" Good!

[Brother Phil (Quarantined)]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

Oh my, Brother, God does not Love everyone in the world! He only Loves we True Christian ™ Congeregants here at Landover Baptist Church - where JESUS says our Sermons are "finger-lickin'" Good!

Yeah ok... you keep believing the lies that your screwed up church is telling you... and keep to that KJV1611! Good for you!

But unfortunately most Christians are severely deterred by putting a TM after the name of their faith. It seems, with the way that your church is run, it should be "Truly Screwed Up (TM)"

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

No that is not what I meant. I was saying that they were such chauvinist bastards that they want to think that women are inferior and that they have no souls. That idea feeds their chauvinist superiority complex.

How is it that God can love everyone in the world reguardless of religion and yet he cannot love women?

GOD created women, but He didn't really want to. First he had Adam look over all the animals to see if one would be OK as a pal, but Adam didn't like any of them. Of course, if Adam had realized what a bunch of lying, deceiving, yappity-yap-yap-yapping nags they would turn out to be, he would have picked a woodchuck or something. Anyway, GOD created Eve and she immediately began cavorting with SATAN and got them both kicked out of the Garden of Eden, the bitch! So God hates women and only tolerates them if they understand their place, which is to cook, clean and have babies, and keep their mouths shut.

Genesis 3:16
Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. Isiah 3:12As for my people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them.

1 Corinthians 11:3
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

1 Corinthians 14:34-36
Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law. And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.

Ephesians 5:22-24
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Colossians 3:18Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.

1 Timothy 2:11-15
Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing.

1 Peter 3:1
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands.

[Brother Phil (Quarantined)]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

GOD created women, but He didn't really want to. First he had Adam look over all the animals to see if one would be OK as a pal, but Adam didn't like any of them. Of course, if Adam had realized what a bunch of lying, deceiving, yappity-yap-yap-yapping nags they would turn out to be, he would have picked a woodchuck or something. Anyway, GOD created Eve and she immediately began cavorting with SATAN and got them both kicked out of the Garden of Eden, the bitch! So God hates women and only tolerates them if they understand their place, which is to cook, clean and have babies, and keep their mouths shut.

Genesis 3:16
Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. Isiah 3:12As for my people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them.

1 Corinthians 11:3
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

1 Corinthians 14:34-36
Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law. And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.

Ephesians 5:22-24
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Colossians 3:18Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.

1 Timothy 2:11-15
Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing.

1 Peter 3:1
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands.

Again this information is extremely biased because of the Alterations to the bible that happened WAY before The KJV1611 was TRANSLATED... so your argument is effectivly null.

Take Mary Magdalene for example. The church altered the Bible to take her importance away. They called her a Whore, which was not true. She Was actually the desendant of about half of the Tribes of Israel. THat makes her of Royal Blood. But the church Slandered her and called her a whore to hide her importance. Jesus may have even been married to Mary.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

Again this information is extremely biased because of the Alterations to the bible that happened WAY before The KJV1611 was TRANSLATED... so your argument is effectivly null.

Take Mary Magdalene for example. The church altered the Bible to take her importance away. They called her a Whore, which was not true. She Was actually the desendant of about half of the Tribes of Israel. THat makes her of Royal Blood. But the church Slandered her and called her a whore to hide her importance. Jesus may have even been married to Mary.

You are confusing the ANTICHRIST CATLICKS with Christians. It is a common mistake, but I must rebuke you for heresy. God dictated the KJV1611 in ENGLISH. It is literally correct in all respects and there are no mistakes in it, only traps for the unwary and unsaved(TM).

[Brother Phil (Quarantined)]

Re: Am I Going To Burn In Hell?

You are confusing the ANTICHRIST CATLICKS with Christians. It is a common mistake, but I must rebuke you for heresy. God dictated the KJV1611 in ENGLISH. It is literally correct in all respects and there are no mistakes in it, only traps for the unwary and unsaved(TM).

NO! You are an ignorant fool. God NEVER dictated the Bible... even to Moses. You should learn about history before you fabricate bullshit to support your screwed up theories! The Bible was written by men! And King James did nothing to help the KJV other than remove the death penalty to those who translate it! Get your facts strait. You are lying to your congregation Pastor... and God will hold you personally responsible for it!