[Joshua Brooks]

Re: Cousin Hazel Is Ripe

First, I didn't say that we employed one

So you employ two? That would be the more sanitary option. Although I do not feel your use of such tools is morally acceptable I can rest assured that you aren't using his feces stained leftovers. You would be practically begging for Jesus to create a new STD in your honor.

- the real thing works just fine.

I'm sure the "real thing" works fine on a biological level, which is all that you need for procreational purposes. My advice would be to stop using the "fake things" for non-procreational purposes.

Second, he's not Asian - he's German and Irish.

Right, you're a nazi so you wouldn't marry a non-"aryan". My mistake. I do seem to recall a story heading of off the Yahoo homepage once about German men having the smallest tallywhackers in Europe.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Cousin Hazel Is Ripe

So you employ two? That would be the more sanitary option. Although I do not feel your use of such tools is morally acceptable I can rest assured that you aren't using his feces stained leftovers. You would be practically begging for Jesus to create a new STD in your honor.

Let me put this as clearly as I can.
We do not use any - we do not need them.

I'm sure the "real thing" works fine on a biological level, which is all that you need for procreational purposes. My advice would be to stop using the "fake things" for non-procreational purposes.

IThe real thing works fine for recreational purposes as well. We're both past procreating - we just do it for fun.



Right, you're a nazi so you wouldn't marry a non-"aryan". My mistake. I do seem to recall a story heading of off the Yahoo homepage once about German men having the smallest tallywhackers in Europe.

I have dated white men, black men, middle Eastern men, and Hispanic men. I didn't see the article you refer to, but I can tell you his parts fit mine just fine.

[Joshua Brooks]

Re: Cousin Hazel Is Ripe

Let me put this as clearly as I can.

We do not use any - we do not need them.

No one chooses to use an STD and most sinners wouldn't say that they need them, but they do exist to punish the wicked nonetheless.

IThe real thing works fine for recreational purposes as well. We're both past procreating - we just do it for fun.

Wait a minute... you're BOTH past procreating? Stop the presses! You're married to some post menupause plaid wearing German bulldyke? NOW I get it. Sorry for my past confusion, but I understand now.

You should know that that make you a lesbian. Just because your "husband" has a square cut mullet, facial hair, and bigger arms than most men doesn't make her a him.

I have dated white men, black men, middle Eastern men, and Hispanic men.

Did many of these "dates" end with a rope, a tree, and a burning cross?

I didn't see the article you refer to, but I can tell you his parts fit mine just fine.

I'm sure his choo-choo would fit where your choo-choo is positioned seeing as you both have the same genitalia. You might even say they are interchangeable if that kind of thing were possible. But we are human beings, not Mrs Potatoe Heads.

This is what I don't understand. You lesbians claim you don't want or need a man yet the first tihng you do after choosing the lesbian lifestyle is acquire a substitute tallywhacker.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Cousin Hazel Is Ripe

[color=black]No one chooses to use an STD and most sinners wouldn't say that they need them, but they do exist to punish the wicked nonetheless.

I was referring to dildoes, not STD's.

Wait a minute... you're BOTH past procreating? Stop the presses! You're married to some post menupause plaid wearing German bulldyke? NOW I get it. Sorry for my past confusion, but I understand now.

You should know that that make you a lesbian. Just because your "husband" has a square cut mullet, chest hair, and bigger arms than most men doesn't make her a him, right?

I'm a she - born with two X chromosomes. He's a he - born with an x and a Y chromosome.

Did many of these "dates" end with a rope, a tree, and a burning cross?

No way. Some ended with a kiss goodnight, some ended with a sleepover.


I'm sure his choo-choo would fit where your choo-choo is positioned seeing as you both have the same genitalia. You might even say they are interchangeable if that kind of thing were possible. But we are human beings, not Mrs Potatoe Heads.

This is what I don't understand. You lesbians claim you don't want or need a man yet the first tihng you do after choosing the lesbian lifestyle is acquire a substitute tallywhacker.

See above - I'm a she, he's a he.

You're showing the misinterpretation prowess of a true Landovite.