[sinner]

Re: Pregnant

Did you ever consider cleaning up your act a little and preaching on TV? These guys take money from little only ladies, too. Put the most attractive wife on with you. Make sure she has big fake boobs, is heavily made up and can shed tears without hesitation. Within a couple months you will be able to purchase a Lear or a Gulfstream so you can witness to the unsaved in exotic global locations.

Sister Roberta, you mean to say that she should look like this?




_______________________

"I take Him shopping with me. I say, "OK, Jesus, help me find a bargain." Tammy Faye Bakker

[Roberta]

Re: Pregnant

That looks like the poor drag queen Tammy Faye Bakkdor. She was a mistress at the type of behavior I was alluding to and bilked thousands of true Christians by selling fairy wheel rides in perpetuity in South Carolina. God saw fit to punish Ms. Bakkdor and Tammy died an agonizing death from cancer that was caused by frequent colonic prodding.

Back to you BJ. Yeah, "turning screws". That's even worse than talking dirty. I do not turn any kind of "tricks", thank you. . Please lay off me.

[Tammy]

Re: Pregnant

That looks like the poor drag queen Tammy Faye Bakkdor. She was a mistress at the type of behavior I was alluding to and bilked thousands of true Christians by selling fairy wheel rides in perpetuity in South Carolina. God saw fit to punish Ms. Bakkdor and Tammy died an agonizing death from cancer that was caused by frequent colonic prodding.

Back to you BJ. Yeah, "turning screws". That's even worse than talking dirty. I do not turn any kind of "tricks", thank you. . Please lay off me.

You hairy, fake breasted pig. How dare you speak to me that way.

Colonic probing?? Honey, I ain't gonna lie; I've played the back nine before. But unlike you it was in servitude to my husband; not some kind of gratuitous sexual fling with six bikers in a bar. I bet your colon's so loose you have to tie it in a knot to keep it from hanging out under your dress.

[Roberta]

Re: Pregnant

Yeah, your husband and Ron Jeremy, Vanilla Ice, and Erik Estrada all at the same time. We are all PTL for your demise.

Oh, and mine are real and so are my eyebrows. What's wrong with bikers?

[Joshua Brooks]

Re: Pregnant

Dear BJ,

I appreciate your kindness but it's not a sinecure that I am after. I want a SOULmate, not someone who leads an orgiastic life.

I require a great deal of carnal attention. Why would I ever consider an unconsumated relationship? And furthermore, I look better in black (leather or latex) than blue!

You own leather and latex outfits? Does splattered milk bead off of such material? I take it it can get pretty messy in the dairy industry, correct?

[Roberta]

Re: Pregnant

Dear Josh,

What the girls in the Liebfraumilch program do is not messy at all. In fact, most days I work from home.

When I do go to the "barn", it is simply to enjoy the conviviality of other kindred ladies and participate in the fitness programs. The outfits I referred to are not worn on a daily basis; they are for very special occasions.

Robbie

[Joshua Brooks]

Re: Pregnant

Dear Josh,

What the girls in the Liebfraumilch program do is not messy at all. In fact, most days I work from home.

When I do go to the "barn", it is simply to enjoy the conviviality of other kindred ladies and participate in the fitness programs. The outfits I referred to are not worn on a daily basis; they are for very special occasions.

Robbie

The diary profession must be far more complex and exciting than I would have imagined. I would have never thought you had galas and balls and other such partying events. But leather and latex? They must be themed events like holloween partys(but with celebrating Satan's birthday), right? Sounds like fun.

[Roberta]

Re: Pregnant

You're taking this all out of context, Dear Josh. Please do not confuse my working life with my social life. Sure we have the occasional party in VT just like everywhere else but the last gala I attended was my graduation cotillion at Farmington.

I am a simple girl living in God's majestic Green Mountains. I do have another life behind closed doors and that is something we could have perhaps shared. It's not something I will discuss in these forums.

I have been rebuked, infracted, called harlot and further subjected to insults because of my appearance. It hurts and I sometimes respond in an unkindly and off the wall manner.

Some people like to play with my "aviator", alter my signature and just plain make fun of me. I pray for them; they need it the most.

I came here looking for a True Chrisitian mate because there are very few eligible men in VT. The only men who corresponded with me were the skat loving yellow mongrol Hiroshi, the oedipal Mr. Godwin and Pastor BJ who runs some kind of "lines" in IA. I invited Mr. Cross from Texas to apply for a lacrosse coaching position and was immediately branded a lesbian? As recently as yesterday I was accused of being a carpet muncher and car fornicator because I enjoy driving my Volvo up into the hills.

I have only been a member for a week or so but I want to have children so that I can share my love of God with them. I am a special person and I know He has a plan for me.

YIC,

Robbie

[Joshua Brooks]

Re: Pregnant

You're taking this all out of context, Dear Josh. Please do not confuse my working life with my social life. Sure we have the occasional party in VT just like everywhere else but the last gala I attended was my graduation cotillion at Farmington.

I am a simple girl living in God's majestic Green Mountains. I do have another life behind closed doors and that is something we could have perhaps shared. It's not something I will discuss in these forums.

I apologize if my curiousity has stumbled unto some Anglican ritual involving uncommon clothing practices that you can't share with the general public.

I'm just a simple boy from the Missouri countryside so I have no reckoning of the social usage of leather or spandex other than expensive jackets and American women's (and european men) sports attire. I was merely 12 years old when my single mother moved us to Freehold, Iowa to take up a lucrative job offering so please excuse me for my naivity and ignorance when it comes to the world outside of Freehold. I only know what I've been taught by Freehold educators.

I have been rebuked, infracted, called harlot and further subjected to insults because of my appearance. It hurts and I sometimes respond in an unkindly and off the wall manner.

The members of Landoverbaptist Church are merely trying to help you form a closer relationship with Jesus. In the eyes of God's chosen people it is imparitive that they save as many souls as possible by any means necessary and many members take it to levels that I personally don't have to stomach or upbringing for. When I was caught listening to the nigra group Outkast on the radio some years back I was sternly rebuked by the Sunday School teacher. Afterwards she explained to me that I was heading face first into the pits of Hell and that when she sees a person willingly running toward that blazing fire she feels it was her christian duty to save me, even if it hurt my feelings. I got an even worse scolding by the menfolk for laughing at their wee-wee sizes in the swimming pool changing room when I was 14. I'll never make that mistake again. But now I have a thick skin and feel confident in my salvation.

Some people like to play with my "aviator", alter my signature and just plain make fun of me. I pray for them; they need it the most.

Yes, I recall reading something where you mentioned church members finding your flicker pictures. What is this "flicker"? I don't have the same access to DOF files as full members of the church do. It amazes me how they are able to find information on people. So what is your real avatar? I just assumed you changed you photo because you were bored with the previous one.

I sincerely believe that the congregation here have done what they felt needed to be done in the name of True Christian Love. I think the members are just trying to thicken your skin. It's a very dangerous and satanic world out there. So I'm told. And with atheist and liberals trying to destroy everything that Christ stands for it is especially dangerous for christians. We have to have a thick skin in order to face the challenges and harsh words the Allied Atheist Agenda throws at us.

I came here looking for a True Chrisitian mate because there are very few eligible men in VT. The only men who corresponded with me were the skat loving yellow mongrol Hiroshi, the oedipal Mr. Godwin and Pastor BJ who runs some kind of "lines" in IA. I invited Mr. Cross from Texas to apply for a lacrosse coaching position and was immediately branded a lesbian? As recently as yesterday I was accused of being a carpet muncher and car fornicator because I enjoy driving my Volvo up into the hills.

Have you consider purchasing a Ford SUV? I would surmise that a Volvo is quite common where you are from. One can hardly hold it against you seeing that you were raised in Vermont of all places.

I have only been a member for a week or so but I want to have children so that I can share my love of God with them. I am a special person and I know He has a plan for me.

There is no doubt in my mind that our Lord has a plan for you. Why else would He lead you here to His favorite forum. You are here to be Saved and we are here to help you in that endeaver. PRAISE, JESUS!!!

[Roberta]

Re: Pregnant

Joshua sweetie,

You have asked some very personal questions and volunteered a wee bit too much information about yourself. If you want to continue communicating with me I suggest we use email. I do not want any more trouble on these boards.

Robbie

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Pregnant

Joshua sweetie,

You have asked some very personal questions and volunteered a wee bit too much information about yourself. If you want to continue communicating with me I suggest we use email. I do not want any more trouble on these boards.

Robbie

And the point of that would be what Roberta? This isn't the People's Republic of Vermont Roberta, all of Joshua's e-mail is screened at the server level so your pathetic attempts to lure poor Joshua into depravity with your unsaved body will not work.

Attempting to seduce young men, typical behavior of a lesbian. You've earned yourself more warning points harlot.

[Joshua Brooks]

Re: Pregnant

Joshua sweetie,

You have asked some very personal questions and volunteered a wee bit too much information about yourself. If you want to continue communicating with me I suggest we use email. I do not want any more trouble on these boards.

Robbie

There can be no trouble when one is sincerely thriving to receive the Love of Jesus Christ. It is a joyous occasion indeed. But for some it is a more harrowing feat than must. I can completely understand the need to take small baby steps because the glory of Jesus can be too much for some to handle all at once. PRAISE!!! If you are not prepared to face the entire congregation feel free to PM me.

And the point of that would be what Roberta? This isn't the People's Republic of Vermont Roberta, all of Joshua's e-mail is screened at the server level so your pathetic attempts to lure poor Joshua into depravity with your unsaved body will not work.

Attempting to seduce young men, typical behavior of a lesbian. You've earned yourself more warning points harlot.

Brother BJ,

If we simply shunned everyone away we wouldn't have such wonderful residents as Sister Noddy, a former sass mouthed Episcopalian.

This woman has come here seeking the Light of Jesus. She has even admitted that she has felt the hand of Jesus guide her to this, God's Favorite Forum, which is more than I can say for the majority of unsaved trash who come here merely to mock our Lord and Savior. I cannot in good conscience turn away a soul seeking the call of Jesus. I am merely following in the footsteps our own dear Pastor Ezekiel who selflessly witnesses in private to many longing souls who aren't ready to bear their souls to all. I've seen plenty of people enter his office after service and even into the late night hours when it was my turn to lock up the church doors.

I do not believe she is some lesbian temptress trying to seduce young men. Her body does not wish to lead me or anyone into depravity, but rather her body has a burning desire to be filled with the Love of Jesus. Praise His holy name! AMEN!!

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Pregnant

Attempting to seduce young men, typical behavior of a lesbian.

Since when do lesbians attempt to seduce men? If she's interested in Joshua, she's obviously not a lesbian. If she were a lesbian, she'd be looking for a liasion with a woman.

[Deaner]

Re: Pregnant

Since when do lesbians attempt to seduce men? If she's interested in Joshua, she's obviously not a lesbian. If she were a lesbian, she'd be looking for a liasion with a woman.

Oh boy; you're back. You've been gone for awhile. Just get outta jail?

[Roberta]

Re: Pregnant

Dear Josh,

I have the feeling that Big Brother BJ would be reading our communications. You know he has been after me since day one and I think he feels rejected because I have been talking to you.

Two weeks ago he offered to send a private jet to VT to fly me back to Iowa. Now all of a sudden I have become a harlot lesbian. Believe me, I am the same girl who he proposed to.

Robbie