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My wife Hildegard Abendroth-Bond was called home about 15 years ago and since then I have been faced with many godless liberals telling me I should get married again. I give them a stern rebuking, wack them on the head with my large-print Bible, and send them on their way. We're not Mormons here! We know that Jesus hates it when men marry more than one woman enough to send you to Hell for eternity for it! For future reference, can a Pastor please outline what the Bible says about marrying more than once? Thank you.
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Re: Marrying twice
Brother Otto, I am no Pastor but I take Matthew as my guide:Originally posted by Dr. Otto Bond Sr. View Post
M't:22:23: The same day came to him the Sadducees, which say that there is no resurrection, and asked him,
M't:22:24: Saying, Master, Moses said, If a man die, having no children, his brother shall marry his wife, and raise up seed unto his brother.
M't:22:25: Now there were with us seven brethren: and the first, when he had married a wife, deceased, and, having no issue, left his wife unto his brother:
M't:22:26: Likewise the second also, and the third, unto the seventh.
M't:22:27: And last of all the woman died also.
M't:22:28: Therefore in the resurrection whose wife shall she be of the seven? for they all had her.
M't:22:29: Jesus answered and said unto them, Ye do err, not knowing the scriptures, nor the power of God.
M't:22:30: For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven.
M't:22:31: But as touching the resurrection of the dead, have ye not read that which was spoken unto you by God, saying,
M't:22:32: I am the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob? God is not the God of the dead, but of the living.
M't:22:33: And when the multitude heard this, they were astonished at his doctrine.
Added to this we must be sure that the 2nd (or subsequent) wife or wives are not divorced:
M't:19:3: The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?
M't:19:7: They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away?
M't:19:8: He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.
M't:19:9: And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
I assume that, as angels, wives will not be as picky as they are on earth and understand that you liked the first so much that you got another one just like her.sigpic
Author of such illuminating essays as,
“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs. -
Re: Marrying twice
I think I've found the perfect future wife for you. She's a fine southern belle and was a Miss Teen 2007 contestant (can't remember if she won, but I think she's related to the Bush family, and if that's true then she did.)
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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Re: Marrying twice
Perfect wife? Dude that blondie has like NO brains!Originally posted by Jeb Thurmond View Post
Its a shame for women to see such specimens get in public!
She's probably halfway between an Apistogramma macmasteri and an Alocodon in IQ! Not to forget the DNA of paco salamander! 
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Re: Marrying twice
I think you are being a little harsh. She looks like she would be a wonderful wife. She was probably home schooled.Originally posted by Orelia View PostPerfect wife? Dude that blondie has like NO brains!
Its a shame for women to see such specimens get in public!
She's probably halfway between an Apistogramma macmasteri and an Alocodon in IQ! Not to forget the DNA of paco salamander!
All she needs to know is her place.Comment
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Re: Marrying twice
besides, if she married a Landover True Christian(tm) gentleman, she'd have a driver and thus no need of maps.www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
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Re: Marrying twice
You mean all of the True Christian men arent already taken?Originally posted by JennyD View Post
Does that mean there is hope for me?!?!?!?!
For though I be free from all men, yet have I made myself servant unto all, that I might gain the more.--- 1 Corinthians 9:19Comment
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Re: Marrying twice
I've done some more research, and it turns out that Miss South Carolina's virgnity can only be confirmed at %66.6. (2 of her orifaces are confirmed virgin, but one is currently unconfirmed).
Here's a good plan B:
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
Did I use a new word you've never heard? Definitions here. | Vote! Everything you need to vote here!Comment
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Re: Marrying twice
Yes and no.Originally posted by Jesussaysslipnotsucks View Post
Just kidding. Remember what Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7:8-9:
I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
Admittedly, I know a few couples who would debate the point.
Most of us get around to the uncontaining point eventually, but we do try to be celibate.
Pour out thy fury upon the heathen that know thee not, and upon the families that call not on thy name.... Jeremiah 10:25Comment
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Re: Marrying twice
What would a wife need brains for?Originally posted by Orelia View Post
For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. 2 Timothy 3:6-7, describing the End of Times.
Many is the time I have spent hours watching DVDs of the Miss Teen USA pageant, noting for the Landover Baptist Sin Catalog all of the harlotries on display, such as these nubile, underaged girls parading their lithe and succulent bodies around in bikinis no larger than a postage stamp. Disgusting!Its a shame for women to see such specimens get in public!
She's almost as stupid as someone who would use scientific names of fishes and dinosaurs and noms de plume of artists in the place of simple words to pretend that he wasn't an ignoramus, yet would prove that he was nevertheless both an idiot and a dips**t by ending nearly every sentence with an exclamation point and a smiley!She's probably halfway between an Apistogramma macmasteri and an Alocodon in IQ! Not to forget the DNA of paco salamander!
Pour out thy fury upon the heathen that know thee not, and upon the families that call not on thy name.... Jeremiah 10:25Comment
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Re: Marrying twice
Sounds perfect to me! Can she cook?Originally posted by Orelia View PostPerfect wife? Dude that blondie has like NO brains!
Its a shame for women to see such specimens get in public!
She's probably halfway between an Apistogramma macmasteri and an Alocodon in IQ! Not to forget the DNA of paco salamander! Comment
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Re: Marrying twice
Um, if that avatar is the real you, I think not, kneesocks honey!Originally posted by Jesussaysslipnotsucks View Post
You mean all of the True Christian men arent already taken?
Does that mean there is hope for me?!?!?!?!
1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...
1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...
Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...Comment
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