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I was going over a few records (don't think you're not in them) and I was shocked at how many folks are stealing from Jesus! It might be too kind to say a prayer for the stingy, but trust me, it won't be for forgiveness, rather, it will be our Lord to dispatch his vengeance!
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Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief. -
Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
Amen! I know a certain couple in particular who, though I ain't gonna say they names*, have been robbin' the Lord fo' almost a month now. I'mma pray that they get what be comin' to them!
*Though I had said that I wasn't gonna say no names, I WILL type them! Henry and Penelope Tubman, y'all have not gave a single thang to the LORD fo' the past three weeks! Even a hundred dollah bill woulda been better than nothin'! And havin' newborn septuplets be no excuse. If anythang, y'all should be tithin' even MO' to the Lord to thank Him fo' the blessin' He have gave you. I know whatchoo did, the Lord know whatchoo did, and now the entire congregation gonna know. You gots some serious double tithin' ta do fo' the next few weeks if you wanna repent of yo robbin' Him!!sigpic"He went on CNN and he laughed at us, and he said, 'They'll never get me because Allah will protect me. Allah will protect me.' Well, you know what? I knew that my God was bigger than his. I knew that my God was a real God and his was an idol." - Lt. General William G. Boykin -
Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
How dare a disturbing element like you poke fun at one of our (contrast challenged) members! Any more talk like that and I will assign 42 warning points to your account.Originally posted by Joo View PostJesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.Comment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
Add a zero to that number and I might notice.Originally posted by Glendora Christianson View PostComment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
Ha ha! Zeke actually gave me 420 points, I love it.Originally posted by Joo View Post
And to answer your question Pastor, yes I do have more ridiculous wishes. Would you like them in volume?Comment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
I saw this teenage snot (I wont say any names either but her name rhymes with Handra) steal some money from the offering plate 2 Sundays ago.
I mean, steal from JESUS? Thats just wrong. And immoral. And, I mean, I can hardly fathom how WRONG that is.
One time I took a pamphlet about Charles Darwin from the secular school I went to, but that wasnt stealing. Stealing is Satanlike. I was SAVING my school from the sinnination that the lying pamphlet would have brought to it! Just the week before, the boys locker room had caught on fire. Once I removed that pamphlet - no more fires have since happened in the boy's locker room. I think that Darwin pamphlet was certainly encouraging homosexuality in the boys locker room.
I SAVED THE SCHOOL.
So
stealing from tithing collection plate: WRONG.
ridding schools of Darwin filth: RIGHT.
I will definitely pray for Sandra, I mean, the girl who I saw stealing money from the offering plate. I will pray that she may see the wrongdoings of her ways ... and I will pray that whatever she buys with that stolen money will look absolutely atrocious on her.
And I will pray for others who steal from the Lord.
Mal 3:8
Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.Premarital sex is only a roadblock to holiness. You don't need to touch another person's body–or your own–to have a rockin' good time!
Abstinence: it's not easy but neither are you!Comment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
Sooooo you are actually trying to get as many infraction points as you can?Originally posted by Joo View Post
1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...
1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...
Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...Comment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
Joo,Originally posted by Joo View Post
We could just cut to the chase and ban you. Would you prefer that?
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
Now where's the fun in that? You know you'd miss me, after all you can only rebuke the others so many times before it gets boring, but you know you have a chance to rebuke me in pretty much every thread.Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View PostComment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
It is indeed, but of course people who take money directly from the collection plate aren't the only ones who're stealing from Jesus. God is very clear on the fact that, if you're not tithing enough, you're robbing Him indirectly:Originally posted by nikilds View Post
Malachi 3:8 Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
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God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.Comment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
You'd be surprised. Before he was locked away in his little white room in quarantine, every infraction point he got, I'd hear about it. What was it... 1000 or something he was up to? I'm really surprised he didn't get locked in the kookoo box sooner.Originally posted by minister noddy View PostSooooo you are actually trying to get as many infraction points as you can?Hai guiz wuts goin on in dis internet?
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
That's because we, as loving True Christians, try to tolerate your stupid beliefs and opinons in the longest.Originally posted by Unsaved and Loving It View Post
We rather speak to you, and show you the error of your ways than simply ban or moderate you.
Because we're not online to have a laugh and browse porn like you depraved pre-teen atheists, but to spread the good news of JESUS!
You on the other hand.. Well, I've tried to spread the Good News at various sickular websites, and that's only resulted in pretty much instant ban.
You're not interested in serious debate, nor to hear the Word of God, and obviously very scared that we'd lead a few souls away from satan and into Jesus loving arms.
Last edited by SalvationSeeker; 08-05-2007, 03:26 PM.If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13Comment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
What makes you think I'm scared of that? People choose to believe what they choose to believe. Not even a "True Christian" can dispute that. If people choose to follow Jesus, then good for them. I might not agree with it, but it's their choice to follow their beliefs. In fact, it's a similar idea as to what the "True Christians" use, except you choose to steer people towards believing in this creature known as God. You preach to those who want to hear it, and if they choose not to listen, then so be it.Originally posted by SalvationSeeker View PostYou're not interested in serious debate, nor to hear the Word of God, and obviously very scared that we'd lead a few souls away from satan and into Jesus loving arms.
Same coin, different sides. It's called perspectives, friend.Hai guiz wuts goin on in dis internet?Comment
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Re: Pray for Non-Tithers!
Indeed it is.Originally posted by Unsaved and Loving It View Post
If you truly think so however, then WHY are you here, actively persecuting us, mocking us, and backtalking us?
Why do you try to make fun of our Holy beliefs, and even stoop to mocking the Lord Jesus Christ Himself?
So this only proves that you're a damned, unsaved liar, who hates Christianity and probably America too.
Last edited by SalvationSeeker; 08-06-2007, 06:03 PM.If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13Comment
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