[Nobar King]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

Yeah, it's in the Book of Sexual Acts Chapter 69, Verse 69:

"Vaginas are really cool."

You're a riot. Do you have any more good ones?

[TheLegitMan]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

You're a riot. Do you have any more good ones?

Yes, I do: "The Book of Butt-Sex, Chapter 6, Verse 9"
"Girls with big butts are kinda sexy."

[Mrs. Rogers]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

Yeah, it's in the Book of Sexual Acts Chapter 69, Verse 69:

"Vaginas are really cool."

Is that the Amplified version? We don't allow quoting from false bibles here, son.

[MarkHenry]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

if you have a wife faithfull to you, the chastity belt will be a waste of money.

Shouldn't men also be wearing chastity belts? There are male versions of it. It would save you from an extra sin in emergency situations... just saying.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

if you have a wife faithfull to you, the chastity belt will be a waste of money.

Agreed. I never used one on my wife, no need for it. I don't let her meet any men or any people for that matter anyway. I used to go with here whenever she left the house but now that we have online shopping there is no need for her to leave the house at all for that.

[MarkHenry]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

Agreed. I never used one on my wife, no need for it.

That's my point. If you can't trust your wife on such a simple thing, you propably have the wrong one. Just stay in a nice, tidy environment and keep your wife bussy with making her cook clean and teach the kids.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

My wife and none of my girls have to wear one. Not only do I trust them but the closest real person who is not family is over forty miles away. When my oldest two girls go on a date, it is chaperoned by at least two adults.

The nigras and messican women folk, who knows what they do, they are are all worthless heathens anyways. They know I charge by the person to stay in the coop so a baby costs the same as an adult. No discrimination on my farm!

[Virgin93]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

Yeah, it's in the Book of Sexual Acts Chapter 69, Verse 69:

"Vaginas are really cool."

I am not sure if that is really true, Sir, my vagina behind my chastity belt is usually more warm or even hot than cool.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

I am not sure if that is really true, Sir, my vagina behind my chastity belt is usually more warm or even hot than cool.

Just ignore him Sister. He is just a sexually frustrated gay retard. There is little hope for him.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

My wife Delores is so ugly, her face is her chastity belt.

Delores is so ugly, she could turn Rachel Maddow into a grateful, enthusiastic heterosexual.

Delores is so ugly, when she looks out the window she gets arrested for indecent exposure.

Even after a 20-minute shower, Delores smells like an overflowing dumpster behind a meat packing plant. In the hot sun. During a garbage strike.

Delores can't put on makeup because when she looks in the mirror the reflection shakes its head.

Delores' face is so ugly, she makes the county medical examiner nauseous.

When we moved to Freehold, she caused a curtain shortage.

When Delores was born, her parents almost named her "Damn!"

Delores gets horrified stares in a burn unit.

In 2006, looking at Delores was the third leading cause of suicide in the state of Iowa.

When Delores goes out in public, the Red Cross runs extra public service announcements.

Delores looks like she's played a few too many games of "Bobbing for French Fries."

In any beauty pageant, Delores would finish last. However, if the ebola virus can not fulfill her duties....

[Callisto]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

Does the "H." stand for "Henny"?

[Rev Jeffrey Lebowski]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

My spousal womerns ~Sister Verna, don't need me to keep her in a chastity belt. She wears her own every day, and does it joyously.
We dipped a little deep into the Churches' tithe box, and went all-out on outfitting Sister Verna with a de-lux custom handmade ba-da-ka-donk chastity belt from Leroy's Bait and Taxidermy shop (Route 141 and 5th Street, tell-um Rev. Jeffie sent ya)

It is extra wide (cause all the Dill girls have wide hips) and is a mossy-oak camo, and has VERNA embroidered in pink lettering. The sides are lined with the softest baby seal fur, and the lock is digital. Best part is, the belt is Kevlar lined and has side ammo loops for hollow-point rounds, WITH a detachable clip mount for her Glock 9mm (she holsters it in the butt-crack part of the belt). Front has a tiny velcro pocket for her bear mace spray.

When she spots a negroe buck lusting after her Whiteness, she kinda twitches her hips knowing that belt will protect her from jigaboo jungle rape.

She has taken to customizing it even further by putting her cell phone up front, then setting it in vibrate mode. Whenever I call, she is known to let out a screaming giggle of joy.

Rev Jeffrey Lebowski
Sister Verna Too { she wants vibrating rabbit toy to go under the belt ... what the heck is an adult rabbit toy?}

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

When she spots a negroe buck lusting after her Whiteness

Yes those can be very dangerous. I am glad there are almost none of them around here.

[Virgin93]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

Just ignore him Sister. He is just a sexually frustrated gay retard. There is little hope for him.

Thank you Sir, I will follow your advice.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Who here keeps their woman in a chastity belt?

Thank you Sir, I will follow your advice.

You're most welcome Sister. You are a great example to all the sinners who visit us here.