Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Brothers and Sisters, we here at GOD's Favorite Church™ are very eager to stomp out sin before it begins.

The following are pictures on how to tell if your baby is going to be gay.

If you see any of these signs I recommend you have him neutered (as GOD commands) before it has a chance to grow up and sodomize other people.

We all know that GOD finds homers an abomination.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

(this baby is Hellbound anyway for being a homer, Godless chink)

What's the betting it was also born out of wedlock?

[bonzo2 (On Moderation)]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

Brothers and Sisters, we here at GOD's Favorite Church™ are very eager to stomp out sin before it begins.

The following are pictures on how to tell if your baby is going to be gay.

If you see any of these signs I recommend you stone it to death (as GOD commands) before it has a chance to grow up and sodomize other people.

We all know that GOD finds homers an abomination.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper

(this baby is Hellbound anyway for being a homer, Godless chink)

The child is obviously teething and thats we he is biting on the door stop If he is showing signs of homosexuality at this age its nature and not nurture = genteics perhaps?

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

The child is obviously teething and thats we he is biting on the door stop If he is showing signs of homosexuality at this age its nature and not nurture = genteics perhaps?

No friend, the child is making a choice to be a homer. This is not surprising because the child also chose not to be born white so there is no end to the evil of this demon possessed baby.

[M.D. (Quarantined)]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

Brothers and Sisters, we here at GOD's Favorite Church™ are very eager to stomp out sin before it begins.

The following are pictures on how to tell if your baby is going to be gay.

If you see any of these signs I recommend you stone it to death (as GOD commands) before it has a chance to grow up and sodomize other people.

We all know that GOD finds homers an abomination.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper

(this baby is Hellbound anyway for being a homer, Godless chink)

Or said baby is teething and and chewing on the door stop in an attempt to relieve the pain... There are no signs for homosexuality at that early of an age. The child's brain has not fully developed and is not particularly interested in sex anyway.

[Wash O'Hanley]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

I am afraid to know what that little homo's room looks like but I have a sinking suspicion that the drapes are "fabulous".

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

Or said baby is teething and and chewing on the door stop in an attempt to relieve the pain... There are no signs for homosexuality at that early of an age. The child's brain has not fully developed and is not particularly interested in sex anyway.

When you wish to post information about human development (or anything else) that is supposedly based in your "science", please include references.

All you've done so far is make things up, decide they must be true, and present them as fact. I'm sorry, but some person making things up isn't "science" and it isn't "fact". It's FICTION!

Whenever we tell you what God does or thinks or wants, we can give you a reference. Why can't you give references for your "science"? Is it because you haven't got any?

[M.D. (Quarantined)]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

When you wish to post information about human development (or anything else) that is supposedly based in your "science", please include references.

All you've done so far is make things up, decide they must be true, and present them as fact. I'm sorry, but some person making things up isn't "science" and it isn't "fact". It's FICTION!

Whenever we tell you what God does or thinks or wants, we can give you a reference. Why can't you give references for your "science"? Is it because you haven't got any?

Look it up. Try wikipedia, you'll probably find it. Do you know why a baby's head is so soft and fragile? The plates in the skull haven't finished growing. They are slightly seperated to allow the brain to grow.

[M.D. (Quarantined)]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

When you wish to post information about human development (or anything else) that is supposedly based in your "science", please include references.

All you've done so far is make things up, decide they must be true, and present them as fact. I'm sorry, but some person making things up isn't "science" and it isn't "fact". It's FICTION!

Whenever we tell you what God does or thinks or wants, we can give you a reference. Why can't you give references for your "science"? Is it because you haven't got any?

If you really want to know...

“More than 50 percent of brain
growth occurs in the first year of
life, so when one or more sutures prematurely
close, the brain cannot expand
in that area and therefore must
expand in another direction,” explained
Bruce Kaufman, MD, a pediatric
neurosurgeon and member of the
American Association of Neurological
Surgeons. “Such growth can result in
pressure on the brain and disfigurement
of the skull. A pediatric neurosurgeon
can confirm the presence of
craniosynostosis using diagnostic tests
like x-rays and computed tomography
scans.”

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

Look it up. Try wikipedia, you'll probably find it. Do you know why a baby's head is so soft and fragile? The plates in the skull haven't finished growing. They are slightly seperated to allow the brain to grow.

You think babies have plates in their heads?

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

If you really want to know...

“More than 50 percent of brain
growth occurs in the first year of
life, so when one or more sutures prematurely
close, the brain cannot expand
in that area and therefore must
expand in another direction,” explained
Bruce Kaufman, MD, a pediatric
neurosurgeon and member of the
American Association of Neurological
Surgeons. “Such growth can result in
pressure on the brain and disfigurement
of the skull. A pediatric neurosurgeon
can confirm the presence of
craniosynostosis using diagnostic tests
like x-rays and computed tomography
scans.”

That's lovely. I meant the part about how homer babies aren't interested in sexuality -- or babies in general. You know, the part you made up.

I thought you said it was genetically or biologically determined; now you say that they have no "feelings about sexuality" until they're adults? That doesn't make sense.

http://net-burst.net/hope/infant_sex.htm <-- here's the first thing that came up when I Googled "infant sexuality".

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

Instead of wasting your time with any one of the countless anonymous "experts" on homerism who are openly darwinists, I'd like to draw you doubter's attention to the most successful True Christian*#153; research AND CURE for child homerism.

As we all know, people CHOOSE to be gay. And what is so surprising is the tender ages at which some of our most outlandish gay tykes chose to embrace this immoral lifestyle! While a one year old may not know that a round peg does not fit in a square hole - this doesn't stop many of them from using round pegs as their ungodly role-models to choose a lifestyle that will keep them from fitting into your Christian Family. I can't tell you how many mothers and fathers of children younger than 10, whom they used to be proud of, have come to me and said, "Mrs. Bowers, I have noticed that my son seems to like to do swishy, girly things. What should I do?" Well, let me tell you!

Noted lush and dear Sister in Christ Mrs. Dora Denkins came to me because when her 4 year old boy played "house" he insisted on method-acting the role of an immaculately groomed wife who wore silk cocktail dresses dawn-to-dusk and obeyed her drunken husband in every respect (even behind the closed doors of their Christian marital bedroom). While I applauded the Biblical authenticity of such a role, I pointed out to Mrs. Denkins that her son was obviously a submissive drag-queen in the making and, if left to his own devices, would likely turn into a prepubescent Barbara Billingsly right under her horrified nose!

So many foolish parents throw up their hands saying, "But, Betty, there is nothing we can do!"

Naturally, I want to grab them by their shoulders and shake the Holy Spirit into their wishy-washy beings, and scream: "Children are not born gay! That is a lie broadcast by Satan himself from the very pit of Hell itself! It is a well known fact that homosexuals CHOOSE to be gay! And if your toddler can choose to embrace an immoral, ungodly lifestyle, they can darn-well choose TO CHANGE THEIR DAMNED LITTLE TWO-YEAR OLD MINDS!"

Has Your Toddler Impetuously Chosen to Embrace an Ungodly Lifestyle And Act Like A Damned Homo?

Take BASH KIDS' simple True or False test to find out if your child is a candidate for heterosexual rehabilitation!

• When you take your 5 year old son to look at the action figures at Toys R Us, does he gaze longingly at the "Special Edition Jean-Paul Gaultier Fabulous Manhattan Hostess Barbie," but scoffs, "How outré for evening, Mommy! And that cut is so 'Friends' two seasons ago!"
  
• When your 1 year old boy first stands up, is it to perform a perfectly executed plié?
  
• Does 3 year old Barbara convert her pink Barbie Townhouse into a Meineke Muffler franchise?
  
• Does 2 year old little Bobby crawl out of his Baby Gap denim overalls, only to show up for feeding wearing a smart cashmere sweater set and a simple strand of pearls?
  
• Does your 4 year old little girl eschew dainty lace for corduroy and rewire the electrical outlets on your porch?
  
• When you have dinner guests, does your 8 year old boy climb out of his bunk-bed, slip into something sequined, and slink down the staircase regaling your guests with a heart-rending, coquettish version of "The Man Who Got Away" like a 4 foot, liquored-up Judy Garland?
  
• Does Daddy's Little Princess pass up tulle for tools?
  
• Does your 6 year old son shriek in ghastly apoplexy until you agree to wear Prada to the parent/teacher meeting?
  
• Does your little boy keep throwing out all your silk floral arrangements while you are sleeping and calling reputable florists to have everything replaced with impeccably chosen exotic blooms that are new to you, but he knows by name and scent?
  
• When your little daughter utters her first word, does she talk like a sailor?
• Does your 8 year old boy complain that your pumps are sporting "last season's heel," that you look "too off-the-rack" or sneer that "not even housefraus in Nebraska are wearing that tired Ralph Lauren fragrance"?
  
• When cleaning out from under your little girl's bed, do you invariably find long-neck beer bottles and blue chalk for pool cues?
  
• When you walk into the room wearing a new dress, does your husband barely notice, but your 7 year old son breathlessly exclaims: "Cerise and aubergine! To-die-for, Mommy!"
  
• When you take your children to Blockbuster, does your little girl cry if you don't rent "Personal Best" or does your little boy try to shoplift the wide-screen version of "Funny Girl"?

If any answer is Yes: Your willful child has made the choice to embrace an ungodly homosexual lifestyle and is going straight to Hell. Your only hope is BASH for Toddlers $4,000 Righteous Intervention. Sign up NOW!

If all answers are No: Your child is very crafty in hiding their decision to embrace an ungodly homosexual lifestyle, but is probably going straight to Hell anyway as our Blessed Lord sees behind every closet door! Your only hope is BASH for Toddlers $4,000 Righteous Intervention. Sign up NOW!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

Have you noticed that, from what you just posted there, Zekey, it implies that all toddlers are, in fact, homosexual.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

Have you noticed that, from what you just posted there, Zekey, it implies that all toddlers are, in fact, homosexual.

Leave it to Mrs. Van Headlice not to understand a clear example of Christian love and compassion. We True Christians™ understand that we are talking about the eternal destinies of our precious children, so we choose to err on the side of caution and bring as many as possible to Salvation™.

You, on the other hand, seem perfectly content to run the risk that they will make the homosexual deathstyle choice and slide off into eternal damnation. Why do you hate them with such a passion? What did they ever do to you, that you should wish such a fate on them?

[Daniel]

Re: Signs your Baby is Going to be Gay

Brothers and Sisters, we here at GOD's Favorite Church™ are very eager to stomp out sin before it begins.

The following are pictures on how to tell if your baby is going to be gay.

If you see any of these signs I recommend you have it neutered (as GOD commands) before it has a chance to grow up and sodomize other people.

We all know that GOD finds homers an abomination.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper

(this baby is Hellbound anyway for being a homer, Godless chink)

Has this baby participated in the Bible crawl?