[Larry Lee]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

Oh great. As if things weren't messed up enough. I mean if my pastor had shown me pictures of people taking it up the butt and getting fisted and sh*t, I think I would have walked out calling, "I'll be back after the homo is done!"

uhmmm, while I cannot endorse your foul language, I have to admit your attitude is very nearly True Christian(tm). Have you accepted Jesus as your personal Savior? Are you as shocked by Sylvia Saint's licentious films as we are?

[Teen Abo]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

You're barkin' up the wrong three there buddy. I'm a baptized Catholic (seeing as I rejected that though at the age of 12, as I didn't want to be baptized in the first place), I say yes, Jesus is my savior, no I'm not a crazy child molester, no I'm not an ex-Nazi who probably paid off the cardinals to put me at the papacy, no I don't take the Bible literally, more of a guideline on how to act morally.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

You're barkin' up the wrong three there buddy. I'm a baptized Catholic

That's bad.

I say yes, Jesus is my savior, no I'm not a crazy child molester, no I'm not an ex-Nazi who probably paid off the cardinals to put me at the papacy

That's good.

no I don't take the Bible literally, more of a guideline on how to act morally.

That's bad again.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

Reverend Jim,

Have you and your Pastors made a decision on my idea to do the same thing, but with exclusively homosexual content? I believe that queer pornography is at least as big of a problem as heterosexual pornography.

Well, when we have G.A.P.E. sessions, we tend to focus mostly on standard heterosexual pornography, since that is the greatest percentage of the market and therefore the biggest threat. I do know however that Pastor Ezekiel and Bob4God regularily screen gay porn (God bless them for sacrificing themselves for that disgusting task). Perhaps you could go over and join in and help? I'm sure they'd love a third man there.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

Amen, Rev. Jim. I doubt that poor girl will ever have a normal bowel movement again. Still, if screening these films is the cross my Lord asks me to bear, then I have no choice but to pick it up. I can only hope that this week's screening DOES NOT include another one of Sylvia Saint's cinematic epics, such as "Silvia Saint's Leg Sex Friends", "Three Girl Bodystocking", "Blondes Deluxxxe", or -- what I assume to be her ultimate travesty against God and all that is procreative -- "Saints And Sinners".

I tell you that that Silvia is no Saint! What I wouldn't give to turn that lustful harlot over to Jesus Christ. Just get me alone in a room with her with a KJV Bible and a jar of Vaseline (for helping turn the pages of the Bible, since my fingers will have callouses from furious page-turning) and with a commanding tongue, I would preach to her like she's never been preached before. I know I could get that woman to open up and accept Christ. You have no idea how badly I want to minister to her.

[Professor Bessemer]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

Professor Bessemer,

Are you not afraid that you may "backslide" from such a vulgar display of heathenism?

-ND

No sir! I am as cured as an easter ham Brother! Why, I would wager I could watch hours and hours of the most vile gay pornography in existence and not be tempted to engage in any homosinual behavior.

If anyone here has hours and hours of gay pornography in their possession, I would be willing to watch it, just to prove my point of course.

Well, when we have G.A.P.E. sessions, we tend to focus mostly on standard heterosexual pornography, since that is the greatest percentage of the market and therefore the biggest threat. I do know however that Pastor Ezekiel and Bob4God regularily screen gay porn (God bless them for sacrificing themselves for that disgusting task). Perhaps you could go over and join in and help? I'm sure they'd love a third man there.

Oh, I have already joined the Pastor and Brother Fore in those viewing sessions. But as the "new kid on the block", I don't get the best viewing position. And of course, I was hoping for more Christian men to watch these vile and offensive films with. The more the merrier I always say.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

I'm thinking about showing a couple of hours of hardcore gay porn this coming Sunday on the megatron screen in church instead of my usual sermon. It'll be good for the congregation, and I can take a Sunday off for a change.

[Professor Bessemer]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

I'm thinking about showing a couple of hours of hardcore gay porn this coming Sunday on the megatron screen in church instead of my usual sermon. It'll be good for the congregation, and I can take a Sunday off for a change.

I will be in the front row Pastor, thinking about how much Jesus hates that sort of thing and what we can do to bring down the entire homosexual agenda! Praise!

[Larry Lee]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

I tell you that that Silvia is no Saint! What I wouldn't give to turn that lustful harlot over to Jesus Christ. Just get me alone in a room with her with a KJV Bible and a jar of Vaseline (for helping turn the pages of the Bible, since my fingers will have callouses from furious page-turning) and with a commanding tongue, I would preach to her like she's never been preached before. I know I could get that woman to open up and accept Christ. You have no idea how badly I want to minister to her.

Brother! Go to your prayer closet, and get a grip on yourself. That Silvia Saint woman hasn't experienced the slightest twinge of Godly sensation -- in her soul or nether regions -- since 1996. Even your expert ministrations can't revive what the Lord Himself has cast aside.

It's far better for you to direct your considerable energies towards a harlot who is still semi-fresh and ready for harvesting. Such as the Jenna Haze girl. I'm sure you know her. I advise you to contact her immediately and schedule some time for the one-on-one counselling that she so desperately wants from a Man of God.

[Professor Bessemer]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

Brother! Go to your prayer closet, and get a grip on yourself. That [COLOR="rgb(139, 0, 0)"]Silvia Saint[/COLOR] woman hasn't experienced the slightest twinge of Godly sensation -- in her soul or nether regions -- since 1996. Even your expert ministrations can't revive what the Lord Himself has cast aside.

It's far better for you to direct your considerable energies towards a harlot who is still semi-fresh and ready for harvesting. Such as the Jenna Haze girl. I'm sure you know her. I advise you to contact her immediately and schedule some time for the one-on-one counselling that she so desperately wants from a Man of God.

WARNING--------WARNING---------WARNING

To any Ladies of Landover, younger members, or sensitive True Christian™ men, DO NOT do a googler search of either Silvia Saint OR Jenna Haze!

Some of the images you may encounter are EXTREMELY disturbing! I just made the mistake myself and I would hate for it to happen to anyone else. I have to go lie down now, after I clean myself up. I vomited all over my lab coat.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

I'm thinking about showing a couple of hours of hardcore gay porn this coming Sunday on the megatron screen in church instead of my usual sermon. It'll be good for the congregation, and I can take a Sunday off for a change.

Will we be allowed to bring popcorn to this blessed event Pastor ?

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

I'm a baptized Catholic

Some dress-wearing priest sprinkling water over a baby isn't baptism! No, a true baptism is only when one is old enough to know better and your whole body is submerged!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Pastor shows graphic gay sex to audience

I had always thought if the negroidals would just concentrate on killing the CORRECT miscreants in their midst, they would enjoy the Blessings from Heaven as promised in the Bible.

This bill is certainly a much needed step in that direction.

If they killed the miscreants, who'd be left to enjoy the Blessings? Well, besides . . . er, and . . . um . . . You know, Michael Steele!

Some dress-wearing priest sprinkling water over a baby isn't baptism! No, a true baptism is only when one is old enough to know better and your whole body is submerged!

Sister, you might wish to remind him that the time his mommy tried to drown him in the bathtub does NOT count.