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  • GloryEverlasting
    Unsaved trash
    Under Investigation
    • Dec 2009
    • 2
    #1

    Hello Brethren & Sistren

    Hello,

    Thank you for allowing me to join your community, i can only hope that i can contribute my passion for the Lord into each of your lives, and vice versa.

    I am not an American as i was born and grew up in England, however the spirit of the Lord is not felt as strongly amongst people here. That is why i am forced to look further afield to find true believers in the Glory of the Lord.

    Glory Be.
    Tags: None
    • Gabriel Reproba
      Head Attorney of Landover's Legal Team
      The Most Honest Lawyer in America
      True Christian™
      • Nov 2009
      • 2479
      #2
      Re: Hello Brethren & Sistren

      Originally posted by GloryEverlasting View Post
      Thank you for allowing me to join your community...
      Not so fast! You just came in and said hello. Our community is for the Saved only. Let us get to know you first.

      ..., i can only hope that i can contribute my passion for the Lord into each of your lives, and vice versa.

      I am not an American as i was born and grew up in England, however the spirit of the Lord is not felt as strongly amongst people here. That is why i am forced to look further afield to find true believers in the Glory of the Lord.

      Glory Be.
      Welcome! I feel your pain. I can not imagine how I would survive being stuck on that rock with a bunch of communists with bad teeth! What church do you go to? What is your favorite Bible verse? How many people have you saved?

      TIP: As far as finding salvation, you can start by using proper grammar. When referring to yourself, you should type "I" and not "i."
      Yours In Christ,

      Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

      Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

      Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
      Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
      The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
      Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
      How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
      20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
      God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
      Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
      Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
      Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
      There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
      Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

      Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.

        Comment

        • Pastor Isaac Peters
          Senior Pastor
          Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
          Always Biblically correct
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 10639
          #3
          Re: Hello Brethren & Sistren

          Dear friend:

          I welcome you in Christ's abundant love. What's your favorite verse from the Bible?
          This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

          Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance

          sigpic

            Comment

            • James Hutchins
              True Christian™
              Just a Regular Nice Guy
               
              • Jun 2009
              • 29453
              #4
              Re: Hello Brethren & Sistren

              What is a 'sistern'? Did you make a derogatory typo when you attempted to spell 'cistern'?

              I also suggest you look up the proper usage of the word 'Brethren'.

              You will go far in the eyes of our Lord.
              Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
              Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
              Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
              Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
              Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
              Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                Comment

                • Hank
                  Forum Member
                  Forum Member
                  • Oct 2009
                  • 405
                  #5
                  Re: Hello Brethren & Sistren

                  Originally posted by GloryEverlasting View Post
                  Hello,

                  Thank you for allowing me to join your community, i can only hope that i can contribute my passion for the Lord into each of your lives, and vice versa.

                  I am not an American as i was born and grew up in England, however the spirit of the Lord is not felt as strongly amongst people here. That is why i am forced to look further afield to find true believers in the Glory of the Lord.

                  Glory Be.
                  Welcome to the only forums Jesus himself bothers to read.

                  So your english? You seem to have a good grasp of the American language, were you learned in school?
                  Upon the wicked he shall rain snares, fire and brimstone, and an horrible tempest: this shall be the portion of their cup. (Psalm 11:6)

                  GOD HATES FAGS
                  Romans 1:18-32, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, 1 Timothy 1:8-11, Jude 7, etc
                  DEATH PENALTY FOR FAGS

                   WHITE AND PROUD

                    Comment

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