[Gabriel Reproba]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

I, too, wish to offer a welcoming hand. I am a brother in arms. I once considered joining the Coast Guard for three long hours. Jesus told me not to, even though I begged him to let me. He said it would be better for everyone if I just stayed in school. I feel as if you and I are kin! Everyone here will welcome you with open arms...once you have had your full-body examination, of course. Anyone who leaves God's Favorite Country™ and comes back, especially those who go to islamaville, have to have a full body cavity search. I assume you know why.

Now please do tell us a few of your favorite Bible verses!

[Jerakk]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

Well I came to find Jesus when I was out in the woods hunting some deer in Pennsylvania. After my first case I happened to wander by some amish farm and I couldn't understand how they could be living like that. Then I heard Jesus tell me that they are non-believers, that they refuse the gifts of technology that were given to them and that I should help protect others against their influence. I shot one of their cows n' brought that home, figured steak was just as good as deer and I signed up for the army the next day to do the Lord's bidding.

As for my church, there isn't any good one around here, I found one Baptist church here but it was a fake.. they were methodists in disguise (thank Jesus for giving me the skills in the military to spy an enemy when I see one) so I came online to find a church where I could live a true Christian life and worship with other true Christians. Thank Jesus that he lead me to Landover Baptist!

As for my favorite Bible verse it would have to be 2 Thessalonians 1:8-9

"In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ: Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power;"

[SUV]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

Well I came to find Jesus when I was out in the woods hunting some deer in Pennsylvania.

Oh.my.GOD. Did He offer you a Cookie, too, as He did to Televangelist Kenneth Copeland and (possibly) our very own Pastor Ezekiel?

[Jerakk]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

No he offered me something better! Eternal salvation in His name! (Praise Jesus!!)

[SUV]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

No he offered me something better! Eternal salvation in His name! (Praise Jesus!!)

PRAISE!!!

It's even better when it comes with one of His nice, warm, Home-Baked (Heavenly!) Chocolate Chips, tho

[Jerakk]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

Perhaps he was out of them after Pastor Ezekiel received his. But at least he graced me with that cow. Those steaks were heavenly!

[SUV]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

Perhaps he was out of them after Pastor Ezekiel received his. But at least he graced me with that cow. Those steaks were heavenly!

My GOD, yes they are, Brother! When you Eat one extra-rare, it's even better than when the catlicks drink "The Blood of Jesus"

[Nobar King]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

I'm still a little unclear about your user name. It's quite unusual, and I'd like an explanation about it.

[Jerakk]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

I explained in my very first post on this thread.

[Nobar King]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

I read you explanation and all you wrote was that it's your given name. Does it have some kind of meaning? Are you from the planet Krypton?

[Jerakk]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

No.. worse. They were hipsters.

[Nobar King]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

How do you pronounce it? Is it Jer-ache or Jer-rack?

[Jerakk]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

Jair (sorta like chair) awk. It isn't a normal one that's for sure. Just like any other unusual hippy name like Moonblossom or what have you. Most people that know me just refer to me as Jerry. I would have made a name like that but I didn't want to start off with a false impression. For me that would be lying and everyone knows...Numbers 32:23 But if ye will not do so, behold, ye have sinned against the LORD: and be sure your sin will find you out.

[Nobar King]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

Most people that know me just refer to me as Jerry.

I bet that pleases your deadhead parents to no end.

[Jerakk]

Re: Greetings Brothers and Sisters

I bet that pleases your deadhead parents to no end.

If it would have, I doubt it would do them any good now seeing as they're spending an eternity in satan's swimming pool (the good old lake of fire). They died years ago while smoking weed. Apparently their water bong "mysteriously" exploded. I say it was god bringing down his judgement.