Greetings from Moscow

[Raspoutin Mernx]

Hello,

My name is Raspoutin Mernx Warzhawa, and though I may originate from a powerful super-nation with it's roots deep in socialism and corruption, I believe in the words of our lord - Well, At least I do now. I feel like I was somewhat chosen for a certain task by the almighty, for he saved my life yesterday.

I was walking down the street a lonesome night, when someone called out to me. A man cried out my name, and I turned. There was no one there. As I turned around, I was almost clipped by a car. Had I not ceased to turn before I crossed the street, I would most likely have died. There was no one walking nearby. The entire street was empty.

I haven't read much of the bible (mostly because the government has made religious items of certain factors illegal), and I must admit that I have been a former socialist myself, but please forgive me. I know the errors of my ways now, and I wish to redeem myself.

So, yeah.

Greetings.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Greetings from Moscow

Hello,

I was walking down the street a lonesome night, when someone called out to me. A man cried out my name, and I turned. There was no one there.

Welcome. Good start on your road to redemption.

Might I ask, have you heard the voices of anyone else besides God?

[Father Maurice Lester]

Re: Greetings from Moscow

Hello,

My name is Raspoutin Mernx Warzhawa... I feel like I was somewhat chosen for a certain task by the almighty, for he saved my life yesterday.

I haven't read much of the bible... and I wish to redeem myself.

Hello Raspoutin, for a moment there I was confusing you with the Jamaican/Canadian DJ from Montreal Ras Poutine but having read your post I realise my mistake.

Anyhow... if it is the Almighty you wish to serve I highly recommend you avoid this place like crotch-bulge on a hooker... in both cases you are in for a hard lesson in life.

You have as much chance of finding the true spirit of Holy scripture here as you do walking on the moon while spitting chewing tobacco. If you truly want to learn about proper and distinguished Christian worship of our Lord and Heavenly Father your only choice is the Church of Rome.

We have numerous outreach programmes to help young men like yourself in finding the path to Jesus and nobody reaches out to young men like we do. One of the many advantages to being a Catholic is that we have hundreds of thousands of Churches across the world where you can simply walk in, ask for Priest and in no time find yourself in the warm embrace of true Christian love and understanding.

I remind you that cults like The Landrover Baptwit church are usually nothing more than con operations being run from abandoned corn silos in places that make Somalia look well governed. Any money you give these thieves goes directly to their own pockets and if it doesn't fall out from the usual baling knife holes ends up being spent on spurious bling and breast implants for the Pastors favourite strumpets.

A commitment to the Catholic Church means you are not only on the one, only and correct path to eternal salvation but that any monies you give to Mother Church will be spent directly on items that enrich the existence of the poor across the world.


Please take a moment to visit us online or in person at any Parish. Just tell them Father Mo sent you and ready yourself for warm love from above.






Bless you, my unsaved Untermensch,
Father Mo

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Greetings from Moscow

Welcome to our friendly forum!

How much vodka did you drink today?

[True Disciple]

Re: Greetings from Moscow

Hello,

My name is Raspoutin Mernx Warzhawa, and though I may originate from a powerful super-nation with it's roots deep in socialism and corruption, I believe in the words of our lord - Well, At least I do now. I feel like I was somewhat chosen for a certain task by the almighty, for he saved my life yesterday.

I was walking down the street a lonesome night, when someone called out to me. A man cried out my name, and I turned. There was no one there. As I turned around, I was almost clipped by a car. Had I not ceased to turn before I crossed the street, I would most likely have died. There was no one walking nearby. The entire street was empty.

I haven't read much of the bible (mostly because the government has made religious items of certain factors illegal), and I must admit that I have been a former socialist myself, but please forgive me. I know the errors of my ways now, and I wish to redeem myself.

So, yeah.

Greetings.

Welcome friend! It is always great to hear of God's loving care for our lives! And Salvation(tm) is, in fact, achieved very simply. Read this for more information.

And about the papist pedophile:

you can simply walk in, ask for Priest and in no time find yourself in the warm embrace of true Christian love and understanding.

I think this quote tells you all you need to know about this man.

Anyway, do you have a favorite Bible verse? Have you already found a Baptist church?