X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
  • Brother Barnabus
    True Christian™
    True Christian™
    • Apr 2010
    • 388
    #1

    A Belated Proper Reintroduction

    I apologize to Cranky Old Man for not being more timely with a response.

    I'm a member of the 27th Baptist Church of Forney TX. My Pastor, the Reverend Josiah Upwoody saw there were already 26 1st Baptist Churches in Forney and said just because the others can't count didn't mean that his Church would be the 27th 1st ... so it's the 1st 27th!

    I have 2 grown sons. One (Erik) is married, an upright Christian and the father of my 2 grandsons. The other is a Godless, heathen, just out of the Navy, fornicating backslider (Brian)

    My favorite scriptures are:
    Leviticus 19-6 It shall be eaten the same day ye offer it, and on the morrow; and if ought remains the third day, it shall be burnt in the fire.

    I love that verse because I don't love leftovers.

    I also like Leviticus 19-14 Thou shalt not curse the deaf, nor put a stumblingblock before the blind, but shall fear God, I am the Lord.

    I love that verse because it is God's way of telling us to not be a dumbass or an asshole. Who but a dumbass would curse someone who can't hear you anyway??? and only an asshole would trip a blind person .. or Maybe some heathen atheist like my disowned son Brian.
    Nahum 1:2

    God is jealous, and the LORD revengeth; the LORD revengeth, and is furious; the LORD will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.


    If God is Love ... Who created Hell??!!
    Tags: None
    • Purge the Unfaithful
      Confirmed Enemy of God
      BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
      • Apr 2010
      • 176
      #2
      Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

      I am not sure how you talk in your Baptist church but we certainly do not use such vile and demonic language in our church...EVER!!

      Matthew 15:11 "Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man"

      You are new here so we understand that this sort of hardcore bible preaching will be new to you but this ain't Texas. This is Jesus' Chosen Church!!

      I pray in Jesus' name!!

        Comment

        • Brother Barnabus
          True Christian™
          True Christian™
          • Apr 2010
          • 388
          #3
          Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

          Originally posted by Purge the Unfaithful View Post
          I am not sure how you talk in your Baptist church but we certainly do not use such vile and demonic language in our church...EVER!!

          Matthew 15:11 "Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man"

          You are new here so we understand that this sort of hardcore bible preaching will be new to you but this ain't Texas. This is Jesus' Chosen Church!!

          I pray in Jesus' name!!
          I humbly apologize, perhaps my thoughts of my backsliding son made me intemperate...rest assured the bar of Irish Spring is in my mouth as I type and I'll not let that happen again .... Forgive me sweet Jesus
          Nahum 1:2

          God is jealous, and the LORD revengeth; the LORD revengeth, and is furious; the LORD will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.


          If God is Love ... Who created Hell??!!

            Comment

            • True Disciple
              True Christian™ Creation Scientist
              Landover Baptist University Associate Professor
              Smashing atheist science one fact at a time
              True Christian™
              • Nov 2009
              • 2445
              #4
              Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

              Welcome, Brother!

              You are right about the "don't be stupid" commandment of God. After all, one cannot know anything without being a Christian:

              Proverbs 2:6:
              For the LORD giveth wisdom: out of his mouth cometh knowledge and understanding.

              Proverbs 9:10:
              The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.

              Which is why atheists are stupid:

              Proverbs 1:7:
              The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

              As all "rational arguments" against God are wrong by definition:

              Proverbs 21:30:
              There is no wisdom nor understanding nor counsel against the LORD.
              Sweet Lord Jesus,
              I want to pray for those who persecute me, my Lord.
              Please, treat their children as you treated those of Egypt, when they upset you! (Psalm 135:8-9)
              Dash their little children against the stones for their fathers iniquity! (Psalm 137:8-9)
              Hit them on the cheek, and smash out their teeth! (Psalm 3:7)
              Make their death and descent into Hell swift and terrible! (Psalm 55:15)
              Scatter their broken bodies over the streets of their evil cities, like Benghazi, Amsterdam, Tokyo and Mecca! (Psalm 110:6)
              Praised be Your Glorious Name™.

              Amen.

                Comment

                • Cranky Old Man
                  Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
                  You kids get off his lawn!
                   
                  • Jan 2010
                  • 22380
                  #5
                  Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

                  Originally posted by Brother Barnabus View Post
                  I apologize to Cranky Old Man for not being more timely with a response.
                  Apology accepted.
                  5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
                  To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
                  James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

                    Comment

                    • Nathan B. Forrest
                      True Christian™
                      True Christian™
                      • Mar 2010
                      • 394
                      #6
                      Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

                      Originally posted by Brother Barnabus View Post
                      I humbly apologize, perhaps my thoughts of my backsliding son made me intemperate...rest assured the bar of Irish Spring is in my mouth as I type and I'll not let that happen again .... Forgive me sweet Jesus
                      I find sometimes that Zest! soap is somewhat superior to Irish Spring. Well, I just don't like the Irish, so that's the real reason.

                        Comment

                        • Brother Barnabus
                          True Christian™
                          True Christian™
                          • Apr 2010
                          • 388
                          #7
                          Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

                          Originally posted by Nathan B. Forrest View Post
                          I find sometimes that Zest! soap is somewhat superior to Irish Spring. Well, I just don't like the Irish, so that's the real reason.
                          I understand Brother Forrest ... anything Irish carries that Papist stain associated with it .... but I think Irish Spring soap is proudly made right here in the US by undocumented illegals.
                          Nahum 1:2

                          God is jealous, and the LORD revengeth; the LORD revengeth, and is furious; the LORD will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.


                          If God is Love ... Who created Hell??!!

                            Comment

                            • Brother Barnabus
                              True Christian™
                              True Christian™
                              • Apr 2010
                              • 388
                              #8
                              Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

                              Originally posted by True Disciple View Post
                              Welcome, Brother!

                              You are right about the "don't be stupid" commandment of God. After all, one cannot know anything without being a Christian:

                              Proverbs 2:6:
                              For the LORD giveth wisdom: out of his mouth cometh knowledge and understanding.

                              Proverbs 9:10:
                              The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.

                              Which is why atheists are stupid:

                              Proverbs 1:7:
                              The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

                              As all "rational arguments" against God are wrong by definition:

                              Proverbs 21:30:
                              There is no wisdom nor understanding nor counsel against the LORD.

                              Thank You True Disciple for honoring my introduction page with a visit and a post. Even though I've only been here a short time, I've learned the finger from you only spews forth the TRUE WORD OF GOD. Your mastery of Holy Scripture is truly awe inspiring..... Praise Jesus, Amen
                              Nahum 1:2

                              God is jealous, and the LORD revengeth; the LORD revengeth, and is furious; the LORD will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.


                              If God is Love ... Who created Hell??!!

                                Comment

                                • Levi Jones
                                  Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
                                  Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
                                  Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
                                   
                                  • Jul 2009
                                  • 13930
                                  #9
                                  Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

                                  Originally posted by Brother Barnabus View Post
                                  Thank You True Disciple for honoring my introduction page with a visit and a post. Even though I've only been here a short time, I've learned the finger from you only spews forth the TRUE WORD OF GOD. Your mastery of Holy Scripture is truly awe inspiring..... Praise Jesus, Amen
                                  Indeed, TD knows the Word! Welcome, friend.
                                  Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

                                    Comment

                                    • Brother Barnabus
                                      True Christian™
                                      True Christian™
                                      • Apr 2010
                                      • 388
                                      #10
                                      Re: A Belated Proper Reintroduction

                                      Originally posted by Levi Jones View Post
                                      Indeed, TD knows the Word! Welcome, friend.
                                      Thank You Pastor Levi ...... and good luck with that pie

                                      Amen
                                      Nahum 1:2

                                      God is jealous, and the LORD revengeth; the LORD revengeth, and is furious; the LORD will take vengeance on his adversaries, and he reserveth wrath for his enemies.


                                      If God is Love ... Who created Hell??!!

                                        Comment

                                        Previous template Next
                                        Working...