[Faith_Machine]

Re: Goodbye

I vote that we all start imagining what sort of punishment God has in store for me. The more creative, the better.

Sweetheart, there is no imagination or creativity required. We know what God has in store for you, because He already told us:

2 Thessalonians 1:9

9Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power;

Here in the mortal realm, destruction is a temporary thing: Something gets destroyed, and then it's gone.

In Hell, on the other hand, you will experience the excruciating process of your own destruction FOREVER.

Maybe that looks different for different people; perhaps if you were an Irishman, for example, you would be forced to spend eternity not drinking whiskey. If you're a Frenchman, maybe your personal Hell will be eternally taking showers until you don't even have a hint of odor. If you're a nubile, seventeen year old girl who comes on here sexing it up for Satan, maybe your eternal destruction is to spend the rest of eternity being sodomized and orally copulated by an endless precession of swarthy complexioned, well hung sailors?

I don't know what your eternal destruction in Hell will look like, and I don't care. The bottom line is that it will be very unpleasant, and it behooves you to avoid it at all costs. By accepting Jesus Christ as your personal savior. Right now.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Goodbye

The man who wrote the Crucible did his research beforehand.

The Crucible is about a gay English pastime called "snooker", where you hide your balls, and the commentator goes:

"That's not quite what he meant though."

Some of the folks looked like this:



That's what old gay people need to "pot".

Did you think we were born yesterday?

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Goodbye

I changed my mind

Lovely.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: Goodbye

I changed my mind, the conversation here is quite engaging and I couldn't bear the thought of leaving you all behind.
Pastor, allow me to add onto what you have said, then. The Bible was written by forty people, huh? When? A very long time ago, in a language you do not even speak, yet you believe that you know exactly what it means? You must be a master of Hebrew, then.
And it has been altered so many times over the years... how do we know what was changed, added, removed, or left alone?

**"Noobs" please read this before posting.** SERIOUSLY!

This answers all the things you have ever asked.

[WrongGwendolyn]

Re: Goodbye

I thought you were leaving . . .

I changed my mind, the conversation here is quite engaging and I couldn't bear the thought of leaving you all behind.
Pastor, allow me to add onto what you have said, then. The Bible was written by forty people, huh? When? A very long time ago, in a language you do not even speak, yet you believe that you know exactly what it means? You must be a master of Hebrew, then.
And it has been altered so many times over the years... how do we know what was changed, added, removed, or left alone?

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Goodbye

FIVE WHOLE PAGES OF BLAH BLAH BLAH . . .

I thought you were leaving . . .

[Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson]

Re: Goodbye

I guess you just aren't doing a good job of convincing me. Your only reasoning comes from the Bible. And your only argument of the Bible being true comes from... none other than the Bible itself. Not very convincing to me.
Say I were to write a book. A book that explains in full detail how the Earth was created and what the creator has in mind for the things there, and then sets very precise laws and morals for them. And multiple times, this book says that those that believe in it will be saved, and those who do not will be condemned, from some eternal punishment after death.
My book says it's true, right? I guess that would make it true, by your logic.

The Bible has 40 different authors written over the course of thousands of years. Your metaphor fails.

[WrongGwendolyn]

Re: Goodbye

The only thing I'm disappointed about is the fact that you've been a member of this forum since February 19, yet still haven't accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.

What is the holdup? I would have thought you'd have been saved by now.

I guess you just aren't doing a good job of convincing me. Your only reasoning comes from the Bible. And your only argument of the Bible being true comes from... none other than the Bible itself. Not very convincing to me.
Say I were to write a book. A book that explains in full detail how the Earth was created and what the creator has in mind for the things there, and then sets very precise laws and morals for them. And multiple times, this book says that those that believe in it will be saved, and those who do not will be condemned, from some eternal punishment after death.
My book says it's true, right? I guess that would make it true, by your logic.
What exactly is in the Bible that convinces you it's true? Not trying to flat-out say you're wrong, but I just want to know why you follow it. There may be hope for me yet, it may be good for you to test out all your best converting techniques.

Oh, and Bill... I dunno, it's just that you all seem to love talking about the tortures waiting for people, and I wanted to keep conversation flowing. Very well, I will revel in my future. Hmm... I see a nice ranchette with plenty of space, a decent income, and a pasture with a horse in it. Okay, I'm done, moving on, it shall never be mentioned again.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: Goodbye

I went and researched it as well, or did you not read that part? I didn't rely just on the book. I love history, it is really fascinating. We should all learn from our past mistakes.
While we're on the subject of history, does anyone have any interesting tidbits they'd like to share, or shall we just move on to something else now? I vote that we all start imagining what sort of punishment God has in store for me. The more creative, the better.
I think it'll have something to do with a really sharp pitchfork... some shackles... and an endless loop of Rick Astley singing 'Never Gonna Give You Up' while I beg for it to end.
Ideas?

You're trying to be funny about something that is deeply horrifying. The vast majority of people alive today or that have ever lived are burning/going to burn in Hell. How is this a laughing matter?

This atheist brainwashing leads people to be very nasty indeed!

That's quite sick.

[Bill R. Briscoe]

Re: Goodbye

I think it'll have something to do with a really sharp pitchfork... some shackles... and an endless loop of Rick Astley singing 'Never Gonna Give You Up' while I beg for it to end.
Ideas?

Why would we want to indulge your lurid fantasies about eternal damnation if we're the ones trying to avoid it? Revel in your own future on your own time.

Also, the Salem Witch Trials were just that ...trials. I'm not sure why you seem to be convinced they were innocent. This was before the constitution was even written, so innocent until proven guilty doesn't even apply (not that it does anyway, since it's nowhere in the constitution). A moot point at this juncture, but one I felt needed to be made nonetheless.

[WrongGwendolyn]

Re: Goodbye

Right... so you have faith in this fiction book as a reliable witness to past events? That's the oddest thing I ever heard.

I went and researched it as well, or did you not read that part? I didn't rely just on the book. I love history, it is really fascinating. We should all learn from our past mistakes.
While we're on the subject of history, does anyone have any interesting tidbits they'd like to share, or shall we just move on to something else now? I vote that we all start imagining what sort of punishment God has in store for me. The more creative, the better.
I think it'll have something to do with a really sharp pitchfork... some shackles... and an endless loop of Rick Astley singing 'Never Gonna Give You Up' while I beg for it to end.
Ideas?

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Goodbye

This must be terribly disappointing for you all...

The only thing I'm disappointed about is the fact that you've been a member of this forum since February 19, yet still haven't accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.

What is the holdup? I would have thought you'd have been saved by now.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Goodbye

they were hung on an 'I'm pretty sure they're witches'.

That is more than enough. The Bible says "Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live." That means if you cannot prove that they are not a witch, then you have to execute them, as you cannot allow even a single witch to slip past you.

Exodus 22:18

King James Version (KJV)

18Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.

It does NOT say, "when in doubt, let the witch go, because it is better to let a guilty witch go than to execute an innocent person." It says "thou shalt not suffer A witch to live." That means not even one witch can survive.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: Goodbye

The man who wrote the Crucible did his research beforehand. Really, look it up... He exaggerated a bit, made an entertaining story out of it, but 19 people were hung and there was no evidence they were ever witches.
As for the part with the girls... I'm pretty sir that's historically true too, but it was only two of them. Their names were Betty and Mary, two cousins.
Hold on, let me make sure... Since the Bible was written way before the witchhunt happened, I'm afraid I can't cite it. This must be terribly disappointing for you all, but I would if I could.
Okay, yes. It was two girls who started throwing huge, unexplainable fits that were beyond anything doctors of the time had seen. Coincidentally, other women of the village start doing the same. It just devolved into total madness... but that's religion for you.
There, I went and researched it instead of relying just on what I read in the book and saw in the movie. But from what I can gather... they were hung on an 'I'm pretty sure they're witches'.
Fun fact, the first three accused were a female begger, a black woman, and a woman who rarely attended church. I love theocracies and their sexism.

Right... so you have faith in this fiction book as a reliable witness to past events? That's the oddest thing I ever heard.

[WrongGwendolyn]

Re: Goodbye

The man who wrote the Crucible did his research beforehand. Really, look it up... He exaggerated a bit, made an entertaining story out of it, but 19 people were hung and there was no evidence they were ever witches.
As for the part with the girls... I'm pretty sir that's historically true too, but it was only two of them. Their names were Betty and Mary, two cousins.
Hold on, let me make sure... Since the Bible was written way before the witchhunt happened, I'm afraid I can't cite it. This must be terribly disappointing for you all, but I would if I could.
Okay, yes. It was two girls who started throwing huge, unexplainable fits that were beyond anything doctors of the time had seen. Coincidentally, other women of the village start doing the same. It just devolved into total madness... but that's religion for you.
There, I went and researched it instead of relying just on what I read in the book and saw in the movie. But from what I can gather... they were hung on an 'I'm pretty sure they're witches'.
Fun fact, the first three accused were a female begger, a black woman, and a woman who rarely attended church. I love theocracies and their sexism.