[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Yes I do.

Excellent...

[Miss Cassandra]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Those are excellent questions Miss Cassandra. Let everyone see if Johny Joe Hold will give an honest answer to your questions.

Well, I expected him to dodge my questions in a political, underhanded way, but apparently mr. Hold is even too stupid for that:

Miss Cassandra--My worthy opponent wisely has deferred your questions to me. I am only too happy to provide clear and concise answers to your questions.

Nice to hear at least you're happy, mr. Hold. Now the rest of the population of Freehold.

When I am elected Mayor, I plan to advance the True Christian™ beliefs of the Landover Baptiat Church. In addition, I will investigate the unseemly links between certain individuals in our community and the government of Iceland. By working tirelessly to advance these goals, I believe we can look forward to a bright future in Freehold.

Why are you obsessed with eskimoes? And who are those "Baptiats?"

I hope my answer addresses directly your concerns.

Well, what do you think yourself, smart guy...

I think an issue close to your heart is this: What is the role of women in Freehold?

It's still not the Rapture, but at least it's something more concrete.

While I follow the scripture closely on this issue, I do not want anyone to think I am from the "old school" that looks down on women. To the contrary.

So you differ in opinion with all Landover Baptist Pastors? Do they realize that themselves?

That is why I encourage you to read, and read some more, your KJV 1610. Girls like yourself make me proud when I see them with their Bibles.

2010? Do you know what these "true christians" think of people who use other bible versions than the 2011?

Mr. Hold, you're a fraud. And you're not deceiving me, you're deceiving your own "true christian" followers. This is proven by the following facts about you:

1. You're unable to address the "rapture" question your true christian "brothers" talk so much about.
2. You follow heretic bible versions
3. Your views on the role of women aren't "true christian."

[James Dewitt]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Maybe I should start calling you Crunky .

Someone owes Cranky an apology. He is a venerated member of Landover and an upstanding citizen of Freehold and a really old dude.

[C. Reconstruction]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Slutty drivel deleted

Why do you dress like a Whore of Babylon ?

[Miss Cassandra]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Why do you dress like a Whore of Babylon ?

Excuse me? At what point did you convince yourself that I dress like this:

Revelation 17:4
And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:

I dislike reddish tints. I prefer green. And abominations make you obese, so I don't drink them.

You are somewhat confused, mr. Reconstruction. And you want to lead Freehold?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Excuse me? At what point did you convince yourself that I dress like this:

Revelation 17:4
And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:

I dislike reddish tints. I prefer green. And abominations make you obese, so I don't drink them.

You are somewhat confused, mr. Reconstruction. And you want to lead Freehold?

Watch your sassy mouth miss cassie. That's why I used to advise your father to lay on the Christian beatings. Obviously he didn't follow my advice often enough.

Proverbs 22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.

[Miss Cassandra]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Watch your sassy mouth miss cassie. That's why I used to advise your father to lay on the Christian beatings. Obviously he didn't follow my advice often enough.

Obviously. He certainly would have killed me years ago if he had listened to you, so this would have made me unable to give you the following answer now:

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Obviously. He certainly would have killed me years ago if he had listened to you, so this would have made me unable to give you the following answer now:

That's very flattering, but a simple "thank you pastor" would do.

[C. Reconstruction]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Excuse me? At what point did you convince yourself that I dress like this:

Revelation 17:4
And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:

I dislike reddish tints. I prefer green. And abominations make you obese, so I don't drink them.

You are somewhat confused, mr. Reconstruction. And you want to lead Freehold?

My dear you are obviously in your monthly unclean time, I forgive you.

[Miss Cassandra]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

My dear you are obviously in your monthly unclean time, I forgive you.

Forgive me? You are disappointed I do not dress like the Whore of Babylon? Why is that, mr. Reconstruction? Do you have a fetish for such a thing? I'm sure your christian followers would like you to be open about that!

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

Mr. Hold, you're a fraud.

I am convinced, Miss Cassandra, that if you understood the important role I see for girls in the Freehold of the future, you would support my candidacy. Somehow, you and I got off on the wrong foot, so to speak, and are not communicating well.

I would enjoy hearing your views on motherhood and homemaking. I'd like to learn about your vision of the "New Freehold"

God bless you.

John Joe Hold, Candidate for Mayor
Freehold is goin' forward, Hold on.

[Miss Cassandra]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

I am convinced, Miss Cassandra, that if you understood the important role I see for girls in the Freehold of the future, you would support my candidacy. Somehow, you and I got off on the wrong foot, so to speak, and are not communicating well.

I think we are not communicating at all. Are you a politician, or are you a robot that automatically spouts conservative slogans as answer to any question, no matter what the question is?

I would enjoy hearing your views on motherhood and homemaking. I'd like to learn about your vision of the "New Freehold"

This is very easy. In New Freehold, there is no religious discrimination, no endorsement of law-breaking by christians, no domestic abuse etc.

As for the role of the woman as a Mother or Homemaker, this is dependant on the personal preferences of the woman, and men should stop thinking with their tallywhackers and respecting women in the choices they make.

The position of Mother is a Divine One, as every wiccan knows. Homemaker can be so as well. But again, both should be the result of a woman's own choice. The man doesn't have any authority to decide this for the woman. Is that clear?

And now back to business. I have proven that you do not support the same ideals and do not hold the same beliefs as your fellow "true christians" do. Why are you deceiving and betraying them? Are you an atheist mole?

Please answer with your views about the Rapture that happens next Thursday.

[Alfred King]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

no religious discrimination, no endorsement of law-breaking by christians, no domestic abuse

I completely agree with you on these issues.

Please answer with your views about the Rapture that happens next Thursday.

I think Johny Joe Hold is going to avoid this question at all costs. I on the other hand have not been avoiding questions. I have already clearly stated that I do not believe the world is going to end March 4 2010. It will be very interesting to see what all those who claim it will have to say for themselves March 5 2010.

[Miss Cassandra]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

I think Johny Joe Hold is going to avoid this question at all costs. I on the other hand have not been avoiding questions. I have already clearly stated that I do not believe the world is going to end March 4 2010.

That's because you're a honorable and honest man. JJ Mould does not answer these questions because he knows his position is untenable in these issues.

It will be very interesting to see what all those who claim it will have to say for themselves March 5 2010.

I hope I won't laugh so much that it prevents me from typing replies to these forums anymore!

Of course, it is very well possible that the entire rapture story is a part of some plan of the Pastors, maybe to have an excuse to have people sell all their belongings to shady businessmen, like that Free Market Fred guy. When you have become mayor, will you investigate his businesses as well?

[Alfred King]

Re: Candidate Hold: Press Conference

When you have become mayor, will you investigate his businesses as well?

As far as Freehold is concerned I most certainly will.