[WWJDnow]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

The Bible says "thou shalt not kill," yet this guy tried to kill himself. Under Biblical law, he should be stoned to death.

[Pastor Ed Lowman]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

Brethren, there have been so many good posts in this thread. I just got done reading every one of them. But we have to remember that Satan sending homer zombies is one thing while Christ our Lord is quite another.

I say this for all our readers out there who may not fully understand that we serve a deceased and resurrected Zombie, the God-man Jesus Christ, who himself returned from the grave after dying temporarily for us. We don't want to accidentally bring God's wrath by insulting his nature.

This Zombie we worship and praise, as he siphoned out his very own life-blood for us on the cross. Glory!

Pastor Ed

[Christianzionist]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

All of the canibals were either coloreds and or homers.

Could this be the work of a black voodoo cult?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

Brethren, there have been so many good posts in this thread. I just got done reading every one of them. But we have to remember that Satan sending homer zombies is one thing while Christ our Lord is quite another.

I say this for all our readers out there who may not fully understand that we serve a deceased and resurrected Zombie, the God-man Jesus Christ, who himself returned from the grave after dying temporarily for us. We don't want to accidentally bring God's wrath by insulting his nature.

This Zombie we worship and praise, as he siphoned out his very own life-blood for us on the cross. Glory!

Pastor Ed

Ed, you may wish to rephrase this.

Being self-resurrected to life is not the same as being "living dead".

I don't pray to this, and I don't think it's funny:

[Pastor Ed Lowman]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

Ed, you may wish to rephrase this.

Nope.

I don't pray to this. Being self-resurrected to life is not the same as being "living dead".

Sure you do. We both do.

Semantics, brother. Semantics.

Pastor Ed

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

More Florida cannibal zombie attacks!

Yesterday:

Florida man on drugs got naked, barged into his girlfriend's house, bit a chunk out of a man's arm and ate it, then powered through several cop-deployed Taser probes before getting tackled and arrested.

Those are just some of the allegations against Charles Baker of Palmetto, who is already being likened to the Miami man shot and killed after he got naked and chewed 75-percent of a homeless man's face off.


Baker, 26, was visiting his children at his girlfriend's house on Wednesday night, WPTV reported. He was allegedly high on an unknown substance when he started yelling, throwing furniture around the home, and taking off his clothes.


Jeffrey Blake, 48, who lives at the home, tried to stop the madness, but Baker reportedly chewed a slab of flesh from Blake's arm. Somehow Blake was able to restrain him until cops arrived.


But the violence didn't end there.


Baker was allegedly going wild, tensing his body and screaming at police, ABC News reported.


An officer deployed a Taser on Baker and he fell, but got back up and pulled out the probes. Then the officer used a handheld stun gun -- twice -- before he was able to subdue an apparently crazed Baker and arrest him.

And earlier this week:

Just across the Dade County line, a Naples man reportedly bit and spit blood at hospital staff, threatening to rape their wives and eat their faces off "like that Miami guy."


Giovanni Martinez, 21, was pulled over in routine speeding traffic stop on Saturday when Collier County Sheriff's Office deputies noticed a strong alcohol smell, blood shot eyes, and spilled beer, according to the arrest report.


After failing the sobriety test, Martinez was transferred to Naples jail where he became unconscious.


When he woke up at NCH Downtown Naples hospital, he became "irate and enraged," as noted on the report, and started screaming that he was going to "f*cking kill everyone."


Martinez allegedly sank his teeth into the arm of one nurse and spit the blood into the man's face. He also kicked another hospital employee in the stomach and a deputy in the head.


While lashing out, Martinez was yelling that he was going to rape their

wives and eat their faces off "like that guy in Miami."


. . . there's no indication that Martinez was under the influence of anything but alcohol.

It's not drugs, folks. It's Satan.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

You could cross out the word Zombie in this attack and replace it with the word Atheist and it would amply describe what a book reading party of Richard Dawkins The Selfish Gene is like. Throwing their own entrails at the peoples is about typical to be expected of a group that spends most of its time devoted to mocking our Savior.

Add in some squid rape and you have a typical day with the infamous PZ Myers. The man whose blog single handily made it impossible for Theists to coexist with Darwnists.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

You could cross out the word Zombie in this attack and replace it with the word Atheist

I always thought they were synonyms.

Atheists are just mindless drones who want to eat Christian babies, right?

Zombies are just fundamentalist atheists.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Satan Commanding Zombies to Attack!

I always thought they were synonyms.

Atheists are just mindless drones who want to eat Christian babies, right?

Zombies are just fundamentalist atheists.

EXACTLY!

Atheists are like zombies, they go around spreading their insane doctrine from person to person until the world is nothing more than a mindless mob of rotting flesh. Any Christians that would be left are then persecuted without mercy.